This week’s guest is Lulu Kennedy-Cairns, a woman who has spent a lifetime living between two selves, and learning what it costs to keep parts of yourself hidden. Known to the world as Lulu, she grew up as “Marie”, a child shaped by chaos at home, silence, and shame, long before she was told she needed to become someone brighter, cleaner, and easier for the public to love.

In this episode, Lulu speaks with striking honesty about learning to hide at a young age, carrying shame that was never really hers, and the confusion of trying to live up to an identity that didn’t fully fit. She also talks about alcohol, relapse, and the long road to recovery, including the relief of finally understanding addiction as an illness, not a personal failure.

This is a conversation about recovery as connection, not perfection. About finding your tribe, telling the truth out loud, and discovering that vulnerability can be a strength, not a weakness.

Simba mattresses 👉Great recovery starts with great sleep. That’s why On The Mend is powered by Simba. Start your 200-night trial & experience the Simba difference:

https://highpfrmc.com/OTM_Simba_AU

Heights👉 Join Matt in getting your energy back with Vitals. 20% off here: https://highpfrmc.com/OTM

Need Support?

Samaritans: Call 116 123 or visit samaritans.org

Narcotics Anonymous: na.org

Alcoholics Anonymous: alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk

Mental Health Mates: mentalhealthmates.co.uk

Shout: https: giveusashout.org

IAPT: england.nhs.uk/mental-health/adults/nhs-talking-therapies/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week’s guest is Peter “Tubes” Dale, someone who knows how quickly things can unravel when drinking, shame, and identity start feeding off each other. Known publicly as the funny one, the lad who could always carry it, Tubes was privately stuck in a cycle of blackouts, panic, and self-loathing, watching the distance grow between who he was and the person he became when alcohol took over.

In this episode, he pulls the curtain back. Tubes talks candidly about hating the version of himself that drank to excess, the fear of not knowing what he’d done or said, and the moment he realised he was heading towards losing his family if he didn’t stop. He opens up about relapse without excuses, the weight of shame he carried for years, and why choosing to speak honestly was the first step toward change.

This is a grounded, human conversation about addiction, mental health, and recovery, not as a straight line, but as something messy and ongoing.

Simba mattresses 👉Great recovery starts with great sleep. That’s why On The Mend is powered by Simba. Start your 200-night trial & experience the Simba difference:

https://highpfrmc.com/OTM_Simba_AU

Heights👉 Join Matt in getting your energy back with Vitals. 20% off here: https://highpfrmc.com/OTM_heights_au

Need Support?

Samaritans: Call 116 123 or visit samaritans.org

Narcotics Anonymous: na.org

Alcoholics Anonymous: alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk

Mental Health Mates: mentalhealthmates.co.uk

Shout: https: giveusashout.org

IAPT: england.nhs.uk/mental-health/adults/nhs-talking-therapies/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ruby Wax has spent decades making people laugh, but this conversation is about what happens when the jokes stop working.

In this episode, Ruby speaks with rare honesty about living with depression, relapse, and the exhausting work of trying to hold yourself together when your mind won’t cooperate. She talks about coming off antidepressants to explore psilocybin therapy and ending up in a mental health ward, the shame that can creep in when you “should” be better by now, and why mental illness doesn’t care whether you’re on holiday, winning awards, or doing everything “right.”

Ruby also opens up about letting go of old identities, including the version of herself built for attention, validation, and success, and how terrifying it was to walk away from a huge TV career to start again. She describes fame as addictive, relapse as confusing, and recovery as anything but linear.

This isn’t a polished guru’s guide or a neat redemption arc. It’s a conversation with someone still doing the work, falling over, starting again, laughing at herself, and telling the truth about how messy it all can be.

Simba mattresses 👉Great recovery starts with great sleep. That’s why On The Mend is powered by Simba. Start your 200-night trial & experience the Simba difference:

https://highpfrmc.com/OTM_Simba_AU

Heights👉 Join Matt in getting your energy back with Vitals. 20% off here: https://highpfrmc.com/OTM_heights_au

Need Support?

Samaritans: Call 116 123 or visit samaritans.org

Narcotics Anonymous: na.org

Alcoholics Anonymous: alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk

Mental Health Mates: mentalhealthmates.co.uk

Shout: https: giveusashout.org

IAPT: england.nhs.uk/mental-health/adults/nhs-talking-therapies/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.