There’s a particular kind of fall that happens after we’ve tried to be the perfect parent - not just good, but better than what we had growing up; more conscious, more patient, more healed. And when we inevitably hit our edge, it doesn’t just feel like a bad moment… it feels like a collapse of identity. This episode unpacks how that spiral is not a sign you’re failing, but a direct consequence of the pedestal you’ve placed on who you think you need to be…and how softening the fantasy is what actually frees you from the shame loop.

In this episode we discuss:
- how you didn’t just become a parent… you stepped into a version of yourself you’d been rehearsing for years
the “perfect parent” as a fantasy built from everything you didn’t get, and everything you swore you’d be
- why the higher the pedestal, the harder the fall: pride into guilt, control into collapse
- the moment you hear your parent come out of your mouth… and the shame lands hard and fast
- how the spiral isn’t because you’re failing…it’s because the standard was never human to begin with
- the quiet compensation of “I’ll be perfect somewhere else” when you can’t feel it here
- why trying to pull yourself out of the spiral keeps you stuck… instead of questioning the fantasy that created it
- what it actually looks like to equalise the high: bringing the “perfect parent” back into something real, messy, and sustainable

Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclub


Reach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life

In this episode, we’re joined by family therapist and author Lisa Taylor (The Perfect Parent Trap) for a deeply honest conversation about what’s really happening underneath our parenting. Lisa brings over 25 years of clinical experience into this discussion as we unpack the difference between reacting to our children versus truly responding to them — and how often we’re unknowingly parenting from our own unresolved “heartprints” rather than the child in front of us. We explore the pull toward control, the moments that hijack us, and what it actually looks like to pause, repair, and reconnect in real time. This is a conversation about letting go of perfection, understanding behaviour as communication, and learning how to hold boundaries from a place of love — not fear.

Connect with Lisa:

Book - https://www.amazon.com.au/Perfect-Parent-Trap-Therapists-Traditional/dp/1923403583/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2E8VQDPV2U8TU&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9._ao0PRbW0zBY3kS7KnQ3DUz7-q2qOlhvDeJZgzHdOUwgmDudrVGboz5JAjB-ltXPadqtvGtmzN2J9WgpHPWK1cPmbTJkpf_D23VGctUQbYNLUzFVy3e57ktSLo1wYBWPMZB_nuODGg4lk47n8ew6fA12lwI43ckJ2Rois18URTa7Ed8eAni5WdUbulUUOOEc94irCe3QynwqKXkMTw3bTKfAyRmwQ3uqqGYM9aXr6jLfuubxtJfnBca2pYIgj7PrJGRFhAm_n2VAUkQDX4tJ7mQydWQB0jjErppf6tziYp8.vJ0s9YwswYLjAts_LtqLsFT7n8Vyu_UYsnG3WPKmZBA&dib_tag=se&keywords=the+perfect+parent+trap&qid=1775017583&sprefix=The+perfect+par%2Caps%2C260&sr=8-1

https://www.facebook.com/SFACounsellingService

https://strengtheningfamiliesaustralia.com.au/

https://www.instagram.com/lisataylor.au/


Book recommendation:

Virginia Satir https://www.booktopia.com.au/virginia-satir-steve-andreas/book/9780911226386.html?source=pla&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21618274688&gbraid=0AAAAA-Ia9hP8VfN-cfNAAaQ7omSeUbDuX

Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love.

Reach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life

This one goes right to the heart of what so many long-term couples quietly sit in but rarely say out loud; the moments where you question everything, where disinterest creeps in, and where part of you starts scanning for the exit.

Julie and Bridget unpack the truth that these seasons don’t mean your relationship is broken, but they do ask something deeper of you.

They explore the concept of the “exit girl” - the part of you that wants out - not as something to suppress, but something to understand, honour, and get honest with. Because when you know what that part of you actually needs, you stop making reactive decisions and start making powerful ones. This is a conversation about choice, clarity, and taking responsibility for the relationship you’re in; whether that means staying, leaving, or completely redefining how you show up inside it.

In this episode we discuss:
• the normalisation of disinterest, distance and “co-existing” seasons in long-term love
• why questioning your relationship doesn’t mean it’s failing…it often means you’re waking up
• meeting your inner “exit girl” and understanding what she’s really trying to communicate
• the difference between reactive “I want out” energy vs grounded, self-led choice
• how over-functioning, motherhood, perimenopause and mental load shift relationship dynamics
• the moment women realise “I don’t actually need this” and what sits underneath that
• why stress strips capacity, lowers emotional intelligence, and impacts connection and desire
• the danger of making relationship decisions from burnout, resentment or nervous system overwhelm
• creating an “exit strategy” as empowerment, not as a threat, ultimatum or escape plan
• getting radically clear on what you do want instead of circling what you don’t
• how economic power, self-trust and support systems shape your choices in love
• the importance of clean, honest communication that invites growth instead of blame
• the truth about long-term love: that it requires ongoing attention, not autopilot
• the role of AI in support spaces and why human-to-human connection still matters deeply
• choosing your relationship consciously, again and again, rather than staying by default

Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclub


Reach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life