Your child knows the rule. You’ve explained it, practiced it, reminded them—and they may even be able to tell you exactly what they’re supposed to do. So why do they keep doing the thing they KNOW they shouldn’t?

It’s easy to assume they’re being defiant, refusing to listen, or deliberately pushing back. But knowing what to do and being able to access that information quickly enough to stop an impulse are two very different skills.

In this episode, Shannon talks about why impulsivity in autistic children can look a lot like opposition, and why the difference matters. She shares a memorable story from Jordan’s childhood, explains how executive functioning, processing, regulation, and impulse control can affect behavior in real time, and gives you practical questions to ask before deciding your child is simply choosing not to listen.

You’ll also hear why understanding what’s driving a behavior does not mean excusing it or removing boundaries and expectations. Instead, it helps you figure out what your child may actually need to learn, practice, or be supported with.

If you’ve ever found yourself saying, “But they KNOW better!” this episode will help you look at those frustrating moments differently—and ask one important question:

They may know better...but can they USE what they know in this moment?

Looking for support beyond a weekly podcast? Join our FREE WEBINAR, Helping Your Autistic Child When Everything Feels Like Too Much —save your spot here.

And whenever you're ready for more:

Explore all the ways we can support you by visiting www.notyouraverageautismmom.com .

Join our FREE FB Group, The Not Your Average Autism Mom MOVEMENT (NOTE: You must answer the questions or you won't be let in) Click HERE

You ask your child a question. You wait a beat. Then you ask again, explain it differently, or add another direction.

But what if your child is still processing the first thing you said?

We’re back with brand-new episodes after our BEST OF Summer series! I’m sharing a quick update on my recovery from hand surgery and basal cell removal on my nose, then getting into a conversation that’s especially useful as school routines begin.

In this episode, we’re talking about slow processing and what happens between your question and your child’s response. As a fast processor raising Jordan, who needs more time, this is something I continue to practice myself.

You’ll hear about:

• Why getting your child’s attention and allowing processing time are different.

• How repeating questions can add more for your child to sort through.

• Making room for spoken responses, gestures, typing, and AAC.

• Practical ways to approach rushed mornings and school conversations.

• What you tell yourself while you’re waiting—and how that affects your response.

You’ll leave with one simple practice to try this week: before you ask again, leave a little room for the answer.

Looking for support beyond this weekly podcast? Join our webinar, Helping Your Autistic Child When Everything Feels Like Too Much—save your spot here. You can also visit NotYourAverageAutismMom.com to explore all the ways we can help. Whether you’re looking for practical guidance, help navigating a challenge, or connection with moms who understand, you deserve support for your part of this parenting journey, too. That’s what we’re here for, and we’d love to help.

Has this podcast helped you feel a little less alone? Leave a rating or review wherever you listen, and share an episode with another mom. Your words could be what encourages her to press play.

YOU, Mama, are doing AMAZING at this MOM thing.

☀️ BEST of Summer Series

This episode is part of our BEST of Summer Series, where I'm revisiting some of the most impactful, most downloaded, and most shared episodes from the Not Your Average Autism Mom podcast.

Originally released as Episode 233, The Back-to-School Parent Pep Talk: What Every Autism Parent Needs to Know couldn't be more timely. School has already started for some of our families, and for others, that first day is right around the corner.

Whether you're listening for the first time or coming back for a refresher, this is one I want every mom raising an autistic child with an IEP to hear as we head into another school year.

Because back-to-school isn't just new backpacks, school supplies, and first-day pictures when your child has an IEP.

It's wondering whether the new teacher has actually read it.

It's hoping accommodations will be followed.

It's worrying about transitions, new expectations, new staff, and whether you're going to have to explain your child all over again.

And it's figuring out when to wait and see... and when it's time to speak up.

In this episode of the Not Your Average Autism Mom podcast, Shannon breaks the beginning of the school year into 5 Big Back-to-School IEP Buckets:

💙 Know What's Actually in the IEP — Don't assume you remember it. Pull it out, read it again, and make sure it still reflects your child.

💙 Prompts Are Not the Plan — Support matters, but so does building independence. What's the plan for fading those prompts?

💙 Communicate in Writing — Carline conversations and phone calls are great, but when it comes to your child's education, documentation matters.

💙 Your Child's IEP Is Not Set in Stone — You do NOT have to wait until the annual meeting if something isn't working.

💙 Evaluation Drives Services — Current, comprehensive data matters when determining what your child actually needs.

Shannon also shares important back-to-school reminders about early IEP changes, accommodations across different environments, updated evaluations, diploma tracks, and some of the most common special education misconceptions parents still hear.

Most importantly, this episode is your reminder:

You don't have to know everything to be a strong advocate for your child.

You can learn.

You can ask questions.

You can request clarification.

And you can speak up when something doesn't feel right.

🎥 This BEST of Summer episode is available on video! Watch on Spotify or listen wherever you normally enjoy the podcast.

🌟 Leave a Review: If this episode helps you feel more prepared for the school year ahead, please consider leaving a review and share it with another autism mom navigating an IEP. Helping another parent find this information matters.

💙 And if you feel like you're constantly holding everything together, but inside you're exhausted, overwhelmed, or stuck in survival mode… I created something specifically for you.

The Stepping Out of Survival Mode RESET Workshop is a coaching experience designed for moms raising autistic children who feel like their nervous system is always "on."

If that sounds familiar, take a few minutes to read about it here:

👉 https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/coachingreset

🎧 And don't forget—with more than 270 episodes of the Not Your Average Autism Mom podcast, there is an entire library waiting for you. Search for the topic you're struggling with right now, revisit an old favorite, or simply scroll until something speaks to where you are today.

Listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music, Audible, iHeart Radio, and wherever you enjoy podcasts.