Hi everyone, Jim Grace here, host of Modern Financial Wellness. In today’s episode, I sit down with a familiar voice for long-time listeners John Donlon of Gold Coast Mortgage in Beverly, Massachusetts. If you’ve been thinking about buying your first home, debating whether to keep renting, or just curious about how today’s housing market is evolving, this episode is packed with practical wisdom.

The big question we're exploring today is one that’s increasingly top-of-mind for many: Is homeownership still attainable and affordable, or is it drifting out of reach? The idea of owning a home has long been central to the American Dream, but with rising prices and higher interest rates, people are rethinking what’s possible. We dig into how market dynamics including the role of private equity are impacting both buying and renting, the personal decision-making process around homeownership, and strategies for making the financial side of buying work.

5 Key Takeaways

1. Homeownership Has Always Been Scary But the Challenges Aren’t Entirely New: The financial commitment of a mortgage is daunting and relentless, but history shows that previous generations faced similar pressures, even if the numbers were smaller. The “scariness” isn’t new it’s just that the specifics have changed.
2. Private Equity Is Changing the Housing Game: Companies like BlackRock and other investment groups have become major players in the rental market, driving up rents and introducing sophisticated pricing algorithms. As a result, both renting and buying are becoming more competitive and expensive.
3. The Aha Moment Matters More Than the Math: Most people move from renting to owning not just because of financial logic, but due to a psychological or lifestyle “aha” moment. Whether it’s wanting more space, escaping a noisy neighbor, or seeking a better environment for a family, the emotional reasons often outweigh the pure financial calculations.
4. Don’t Anchor Your Decision Solely to Interest Rates: Waiting for rates to drop or home prices to cool isn’t a foolproof strategy. Both John and I emphasize that timing the market is impossible and even the experts get it wrong. If you’re ready for homeownership for the right reasons, focus on affordability—not speculation.
5. Affordability Is Personal—and Requires Planning and Sacrifice: What a bank says you can afford and what feels comfortable may differ. Homeownership typically requires sacrifices, whether it’s a tighter budget in the early years or asking loved ones for help with a down payment. Locking in a fixed mortgage shields you from inflation, and building equity makes your home the cornerstone of financial net worth for many.

Homeownership is a journey, not a transaction. It’s about making the right decision for you, at the right time, for the right reasons—and accepting that it will never be perfect. There’s value in getting on the “homeownership train” when your personal clock says it’s time, not just when market conditions might look ideal.

If you want to dig deeper, check out Gold Coast’s Tenants Lounge for more nerdy details on the rent-to-own journey, and be sure to listen to our previous episodes, especially if you want to explore the emotional side of buying a home.

Thanks for joining us for another episode of Modern Financial Wellness. Don’t forget to subscribe to the newsletter at modernfinancialwellness.com, and stay tuned for more insights on making your money work for...

Hey everyone, it’s Jim Grace, your host, and I’m excited to welcome you back to the Modern Financial Wellness podcast. In today’s episode, we’re doing something a little different—instead of our usual deep dive into a specific financial topic or professional’s life story, we’re making a big announcement: Modern Financial Wellness is officially not just a podcast anymore, but now a flat-fee financial planning firm! It’s a milestone for both me personally and for all of you who want approachable, comprehensive, and emotionally intelligent financial guidance.

Joining me is my friend and longtime collaborator, Ashley Quamme. If you’ve listened to past episodes, you may have heard me introduce Ashley as a financial therapist. Today, I’m thrilled to share that Ashley is stepping into the role of our outsourced Chief Behavioral Officer—an integral new resource in our practice, bringing decades of experience in marriage and family therapy and helping connect emotional and behavioral insights with financial planning.

We started with the exciting news about the firm and transitioned into Ashley’s journey from practicing marriage and family therapy to focusing primarily on financial therapy—an emerging field that's still relatively unknown but critically important. Ashley broke down what financial therapy actually is, how it differs from traditional mental health therapy, and what it means to have a behavioral specialist on your financial team. We also got practical, talking through how couples (including both Ashley and myself) do annual planning “life meetings,” reflecting not just on finances but overall values, family stages, and priorities. We closed out with a discussion about how to approach New Year’s resolutions, or better yet, use temporal landmarks (like the start of the year, birthdays, or school semesters) to set meaningful, realistic goals and intentions for the year ahead.

5 Key Takeaways from This Conversation:

1. Financial Therapy Bridges the Emotional Gap
2. Most people aren’t aware that financial therapy exists, but it’s all about understanding why you think, feel, and behave around money the way you do. It’s less about “fixing the numbers,” and more about uncovering mindsets, beliefs, and patterns that shape financial decision-making.
3. Financial Planning Is NOT Financial Therapy
4. There is a clear line between what we offer as financial planners and what Ashley would do as a clinical therapist. Our work focuses on understanding and coaching financial behaviors, not treating diagnoses or healing past trauma. Sometimes, recognizing when someone would benefit from clinical support is vital—and Ashley helps triage and connect clients to those resources when needed.
5. Annual "Life Meetings" Make a Difference
6. Ashley and her husband, as well as my wife and I, both hold yearly planning sessions to look not just at finances, but at vacations, professional goals, time management, and even the developmental stages of our children. Pen-to-paper planning and revisiting these notes is a powerful tool in clarifying priorities and aligning as a couple or family.
7. Use Temporal Landmarks to Refresh Goals
8. New Year’s isn’t the only time for a “fresh start.” Consider using other meaningful dates—birthdays,...

Welcome back to Modern Financial Wellness! In this episode, we tackle one of the biggest pain points for couples everywhere: how to work as a team around money. Managing finances together isn’t just about budgeting and spreadsheets—it’s about trust, fairness, teamwork, and building a life that supports both partners’ dreams. Today’s conversation dives deep into the emotional and practical sides of money and relationships, with plenty of stories and actionable advice for anyone sharing their financial life with someone else.

I’m joined by the dynamic husband-wife team, Douglas Boneparth and Heather Boneparth of Bona Fide Wealth. Douglas, a nationally recognized financial advisor based in New York City, frequently shares his insights in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, and CNBC. Heather, after a decade in law and insurance, now directs business and legal affairs at their firm and writes about money, relationships, and modern family life for outlets like CNBC and The Skimm. They’re also the co-authors of the fantastic new book Money Together, which offers couples a compassionate roadmap for building solid financial foundations as a team.

Episode Overview: In this episode, we talk about:

• Why so many couples have the wrong money conversations—and what to focus on instead
• The roles of fairness, trust, and teamwork in a healthy financial partnership
• Power dynamics, especially when one partner is more financially savvy or earns more
• Real stories from Douglas Boneparth and Heather Boneparth's marriage and experience working with couples (including some of my own as a financial planner!)
• Compromise, contribution, and redefining roles as careers and family life evolve
• Why time is just as valuable as money—and should be part of the financial conversation
• How to start better money conversations with your partner, with helpful questions to guide the way

5 Key Takeaways:

1. Healthy Money Conversations Start With Self-Awareness and Empathy.
2. Heather and Douglas emphasize that it's crucial to understand your own background and beliefs about money before you can communicate effectively with your partner. Knowing each other’s stories—the “why” behind the numbers—builds empathy and prevents misunderstandings.
3. Power Dynamics and Confidence Matter.
4. Often, one partner feels less confident handling finances, especially when the other is a financial expert or higher earner. Heather shares how easy it is for the less-involved partner to lose confidence and why each person still needs ownership and awareness of the family’s finances, regardless of who does the technical work.
5. Contributions Aren’t Just About Income.
6. Douglas admits falling into the trap of measuring his household contribution by money earned, but both learned—and model for clients—that taking on the invisible load (managing schedules, carpool, emotional labor, etc.) is equally valuable. Healthy partnerships recognize time and effort as key currencies.
7. Your Money System Must Evolve With Your Life.
8. What worked for you as a couple at one stage may not work later. Heather shares her story of shifting from a stable corporate job to joining the family firm and how openly renegotiating roles and responsibilities can save a relationship from resentment as circumstances change.
9. Regular, Compassionate Conversations Are a Game-Changer.
10. The value of Money Together is in the questions it prompts, not a one-size-fits-all solution. Start small: discuss values, dreams, and contributions. The book’s questions at the end of each chapter provide a jumping-off point for honest discussions, opening the door to greater fairness, trust, and progress together.

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