In this episode of Mindfully Masculine, Charles and Dan unpack Chapters 14 and 15 of The Let Them Theory—and the uncomfortable truth that you can’t force anyone to change.

We dive into why pressure backfires, why rescuing keeps people stuck, and how the most powerful form of influence comes from backing off. From partners and kids to friends and coworkers, if you’ve ever tried to “fix” someone, this one will sting a little.

Highlights include:

• The real reason people only change when they’re ready
• How rescuing prevents rock-bottom moments that spark growth
• Why the urge to fix others says more about you than them
• The ABC Loop: Apologize, Back Off, Celebrate
• Deciding if it’s time to accept… or walk away

If you’re tired of banging your head against the wall trying to “save” someone, listen in. This conversation might be the reset you didn’t know you needed.

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Friendship in adulthood isn’t what it used to be — and in this conversation, we get into why that’s not always a bad thing. Charles and Dan dig into the myths we carry from childhood about how friends “should” work, and how those expectations crash into reality once proximity, free time, and shared schedules disappear.

We break down Mel Robbins’ “three pillars” of friendship — proximity, timing, and energy — and give our unfiltered takes on which ones actually matter. There’s plenty of pushback on the idea that making friends requires constant effort, plus a lively debate over whether walking up to strangers is brave… or just weird.

Along the way: the “friendship market” nobody talks about, why some relationships naturally run their course, and how to stop taking it personally when they do. If you’ve ever wondered whether to fight for a friendship or let it fade, this episode has opinions.

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In this episode of Mindfully Masculine, Charles and Dan continue their exploration of The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins, turning a critical eye toward two major ideas: fairness and comparison.

First, they take on the statement “life isn’t fair”—not to reject it outright, but to unpack its usefulness. Is declaring unfairness a helpful truth, or a dead-end framing? The conversation pushes beyond the cliché to explore what men are actually supposed to do with that idea.

Then, they dive into the difference between comparison that inspires and comparison that corrodes. Drawing from their own experiences, Charles and Dan discuss how jealousy can reveal what you value—and how to use that information for growth, not shame.

Listeners will walk away with a clearer sense of how to redirect energy from external frustration to internal clarity—while staying grounded in reality, not just motivational slogans.

If you’ve ever struggled with feeling behind, envious, or like effort doesn’t matter because “life’s just unfair,” this episode offers a more honest, masculine path forward.

Find all episodes and more at mindfullymasculine.com.

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