“He used to try... and now he just sits there.”

Maybe you've said those words to yourself—or out loud to a friend. It’s one of the hardest parts of life after stroke, especially with aphasia. You're watching someone you love shrink. They used to fight. They used to care. Now they won’t even try. But what if what looks like apathy is actually something else?

This episode unpacks a hidden truth: most stroke survivors haven’t given up. They’re just surviving. They’re stuck in the moment, unable to see how today’s effort connects to anything that still matters. Especially with aphasia, there’s no clear line between the task and the “why.” That’s where learned helplessness sneaks in. And that’s why your role as a care partner becomes so important—not to force effort, but to rebuild relevance.

Key Takeaways:

• What learned helplessness really is—and why it’s not laziness • Why survivors need us to draw the connection between “effort” and “outcome” • How trauma and disorientation hide behind silence or compliance • The power of identity, relevance, and one person who believes in you • A better way to respond when you feel stuck, tired, or unheard

If this hits home—there’s a guide I want you to have. TAKE IT BACK: A Survivor’s Guide to Reclaiming Strength, Dignity, and Confidence After Stroke

More Resources: Two aphasia caregivers and two different paths. Are you Lisa or Elena? https://lifeaphasiaacademy.co/lisa-or-elena

Feel stuck in your recovery? This guide will remind you why progress is still possible: 3 Keys to LIFE Beyond Aphasia

Aphasia spouses and caregivers, we have resources for you. https://lifeaphasiaacademy.co/care-partner-resources

Explore speech pathology communication coaching options: https://www.dolifespeechpathology.com/treatment-for-aphasia-and-neurologic-conditions

Join our private support community for aphasia care partners: LIFE Aphasia Collective

Subscribe for new YouTube episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@LIFESpeechPathology/videos

Listen to Listen for LIFE Aphasia podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/listen-for-life-aphasia-podcast/id1621948384

🌱 You’re not failing. You’re adapting.

“He remembers every detail when talking to strangers, but with me—it feels like we’re speaking different languages.”

That’s the silent frustration so many couples face after aphasia. It’s not that you don’t care or aren’t trying—it’s that the same old ways of talking don’t work anymore. Better Conversations for Aphasia helps you spot the hidden barriers and find the small facilitators that change everything.

Why does this matter? Because winging it leads to missed communication and hurt feelings. Barriers like interruptions, timing, and distractions keep you stuck. But even one facilitator—a note, a pause, a quiet space—can shift the whole interaction. I’ll share real stories of couples who found freedom in small, intentional changes.

If this hit home—there’s a guide I want you to have. https://care-partner-compass.lovable.app/

You’re not failing. You’re adapting.

“I thought I was helping. Turns out, I was shutting him down.”

If that feels familiar—you’re not alone. Most care partners want to support, but the way we “help” can end up adding pressure instead of relief. In this episode, I share three evidence-based moves from Supported Conversation for Adults with Aphasia (SCA™) that cut through frustration and bring conversations back to connection. You’ll also hear Joey’s story—how he turned nightly dinner battles into a bridge for closeness.

These strategies aren’t about saying more. They’re about slowing down, supporting what’s already there, and making sure you both feel heard. And when practiced together, they rebuild trust that aphasia often erodes.

Key Takeaways

• Why common “helping” behaviors backfire and increase frustration

• The 3 conversation moves that build trust instead of tension • Joey’s story: how one dinner-table shift changed everything

• Why you need all three moves together—not just one at a time

• How to pick one recurring “big rock” or “little rock” situation to start practicing

If this hits home—there’s a guide I want you to have.https://care-partner-compass.lovable.app/

More Resources:

Speak up for yourself after stroke—Take It Back: https://lifeaphasiaacademy.co/f/take-it-back

Feel stuck? This will remind you why progress is still possible: https://dolifespeechpathology.com/f/neuroplasticity

Care partner resources: https://lifeaphasiaacademy.co/care-partner-resources

Explore therapy options: https://dolifespeechpathology.com

Subscribe for new episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@LIFESpeechPathology/videos

Listen on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/listen-for-life-aphasia-podcast/id1621948384

Start small. Start here. Start with you.