Light, Shadow, Darkness

From the episode:"If you ever go into the bookstore and realize Tonia is in this bookstore, there's three sections you will fine me in: One is the notebook section, because I keep buying notebooks. The second section is the main section I'll be in, which is the self help section. I'm obsessed with self-help. The third section is the new age section." - Tonia McIntosh"Tonia doesn't use notebooks. If there is anything I could succeed at, it might be to get Tonia to just write things down in her phone or a notebook, or really anywhere." - Brandy Little"I devour books." - Tonia McIntosh"The heart of it is beautiful and the heart of it is real, and that's really all that matters at the end of the day." - Tonia McIntosh"You have to embrace the parts of yourself that are harder to love. You have to love yourself holistically, like as a whole being. You have to love all the parts of yourself. So, you can't just be like, 'I love this and this about me, but this and this, these parts of myself I hate, or I'm not even going to acknowledge these parts of myself.'" - Tonia McIntosh"There's intent and actual outcome. My intention is best, but is the result also going to match that intention?" - Brandy Little"Everything you do is a trade off - When you say yes to something, you're saying no to something. When you're focusing on something, you're not focusing on something else." - Brandy Little"Everything really just comes down to what you're maximizing, but there's usually some sort of costs involved, and so you have to figure out what matters most to you." - Brandy Little"There's certain places where you can shine the light, but if you're shining the light on these areas, then there's going to be a shadow and in different places, because a light breaks." - Tonia McIntosh"Light and dark are kind of two sides of the same coin." - Tonia McIntosh"The goal is to get to a point where you're just fully loving of all parts of yourself and embrace them as they show up and in whatever manner that they show up." - Tonia McIntosh"Love yourself as a caterpillar - you don't have to wait until you're a butterfly to love yourself." - Brandy Little "It really is about the journey and not the end points." - Brandy Little"Light and darkness is a spectrum." - Tonia McIntosh"We're all capable of casting light and we're all capable of casting a shadow, because that's what it is to be fully human." - Tonia McIntosh"Sometimes you have to make a loving choice for yourself and it ends up hurting people. Sometimes you have to make those kinds of hard decisions." = Tonia McIntosh"Sometimes our actions create shadow." - Tonia McIntosh "It's also worth recognizing not just the shadow within yourself, but the shadow in others, and try to make space for those people. But also, forgive yourself for the space that you can't hold for someone." - Brandy Little "Wow! How interesting this shadow episode got dark?" - Tonia McIntosh"You have to know your own boundaries, what you're capable of, and what kind of space you're capable of holding for someone." - Brandy Little"Knowing your boundaries is really important, because then you know how much you can give and when you have given all that you can." - Brandy Little"Maybe the shadow is everything that is behind us." - Tonia Mcintosh"I think we have like five or six different definitions of the shadow self." - Brandy Little"I know we don't like to talk about dark things that much, but there's value in it. If it were a book, we wouldn't be in that section." - Tonia McIntosh"We can't ignore all the parts." - Brandy Little Books MentionedThe Social Leap: The New Evolutionary Science of Who We Are, Where We Come From, and What Makes Us Happy | https://amzn.to/3sR1myMCrime & Punishment | https://amzn.to/3rqEINpQuotes Mentioned"I cried not so much out of a sense of loss, but from the pain that almost always comes with change, it has a sad kind of freedom." - Dolly PartonConnect MoreWebsite | https://www.listenhearter.com/ *coming soonFacebook | https://www.facebook.com/ListenHearter/instagram | https://www.instagram.com/listenhearter/Twitter | https://twitter.com/ListenHearter/YouTube | https://youtube.com/channel/UCtZ0znK-otguMViLFgb_BpQSupport MorePatreon | https://www.patreon.com/listenhearterSponsorsWe are searching for sponsors. Please contact us through Facebook if you are interested in sponsoring us. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★