Guest: Elliott Connie — psychotherapist, best-selling author, and global leader in Solution Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT).

In this episode, Elliott breaks down how asking the right questions can create powerful shifts in healing, relationships, and life direction. With over 20 years of experience, he shows why focusing on strengths and desired outcomes leads to transformation faster than traditional models of therapy.

1. The questions you ask shape your future.

2. Change begins by focusing on outcomes, not problems.

3. Lasting relationships thrive on reciprocity, not blame.
   
   

1. The Power of Empowering Questions (04:06 – 08:19)
Instead of asking “Why are you here?” SFBT starts with “What are your best hopes from being here?” This reframes therapy from problem-focused to solution-oriented.

“A conversation about difference will lead towards differences. A conversation about problems will lead towards more problems.”

2. The Three Life-Changing Questions (12:58 – 15:08)
Elliott introduces three essential questions to break free from stuck patterns:

• Who am I really?

• What do I want?

• Who do I need to become to achieve it?
  Writing these down sparks clarity and subconscious action toward change.
  
  

“You can’t stay the same and expect things around you to get different.”

3. Relationships and Reciprocity (24:22 – 28:51)
The biggest mistake couples make is waiting for their partner to change first. Elliott emphasizes showing up differently yourself and trusting reciprocity to build momentum.

“Anytime you want something from your partner, that’s actually an indicator you’re not doing that for them.”

✨ Notable Closing Insight:
When trapped in the “someday” mindset, ask:

“Suppose your partner never changes, how would you notice yourself being your very best even then?”

Connections:

Visit us: MarniBattista.Com
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Take the Quiz: Unlock the shocking truth about how your unique personality type is silently shaping your future
Buy Your Radical Living Challenge: 7 Questions For Living The Meaningful Life
About Elliott Connie
Change Your Question, Change Your Future
Family Therapy
Aha! Moments Podcast with Elliott Connie

In this episode of Life Check Yourself, Marni Battista interviews Steven Miyao, an executive coach and entrepreneur, about navigating midlife career changes and personal reinvention. They discuss the challenges faced by midlife professionals, the importance of aligning careers with personal values, and practical strategies for overcoming fear and taking action. Steven shares insights from his coaching practice, including the eulogy exercise to reflect on one's values and the significance of experimentation in making life changes. The conversation emphasizes the need for intentional living and the journey of self-discovery in midlife.

Takeaways

Midlife professionals often feel the need for a career change.

Grinding it out is not the solution; intentional living is key.

Many people are stuck in a hamster wheel of work demands.

Reinvention can be an opportunity to align with personal values.

Shifting mindsets can lead to better job performance.

Fear of failure, shame, and success can paralyze decision-making.

The eulogy exercise helps clarify what truly matters in life.

Experimentation is crucial for discovering new paths.

Letting go of past identities can facilitate change.

The journey of self-discovery is as important as the destination.

• The Midlife Hamster Wheel (02:56–04:01)
  Many Gen X professionals built their careers by grinding, but never paused to live intentionally. Stopping to question whether the treadmill is serving you opens the door to reinvention
  Steven Miyao
  .
  
  
  “We are not stopping to question the hamster wheel. Is it true reinvention? It doesn’t have to be, but it can be.”
  
  
  

• Letting Go of Proving Energy (07:59–10:19)
  Old patterns of overwork often stem from childhood experiences of needing to prove worth. Identifying and releasing these habits creates space for a new identity and healthier success
  
  “Once you’ve identified this new self, you can rewire your brain to believe you actually are that person.”
  
  
  

• Eulogy Values vs. Resume Values (20:41–22:27)
  True fulfillment comes when you prioritize the legacy you want to leave over titles, money, or status. The “eulogy exercise” helps clarify what really matters and guides midlife pivots
  
  “The second part of your life is all about eulogy values—what do you want to be remembered for?”
  
  

Connections:

Visit Steven's Site

Visit us: MarniBattista.Com
Ready To Create Your Corporate Escape Plan? Book A Call With Me
Take the Quiz: Unlock the shocking truth about how your unique personality type is silently shaping your future
Buy Your Radical Living Challenge: 7 Questions For Living The Meaningful Life

In this episode, we explore the power of integrating body, mind, and subconscious to release long-held emotional knots and reclaim wholeness. Our guest, Esin Pinrali, is a holistic psychotherapist and relationship expert specializing in imago therapy, brain spotting, internal family systems, and somatic practices. With her experiential approach, she helps people move beyond anxiety, trauma, and codependency to become fully alive and connected.

1. Labels don’t heal—untangling the root does.
   
   

2. The body stores unresolved trauma and reveals the knots that block freedom.
   
   

3. Regulation is unique—find practices that soothe your nervous system, not someone else’s.
   
   

“You’re not broken and you’re not here to get fixed. You’re here to sort of untangle some of the roadblocks that are holding you back.”

Labels can provide temporary relief, but they can also trap you in false identity. True change happens when the underlying knots are worked through, not when they’re named. This shift creates space for transformation instead of self-limiting beliefs.

“There’s this emotional knot being held in the body… and you can’t talk your way out of it.”

Unprocessed trauma lives in the nervous system and resurfaces as automatic reactions. Bringing the body into the healing process allows old memories and energy to be completed and released. This frees you from subconscious loops and opens the door to different choices.

“It’s not a one size fits all approach. You are a unique individual. You need to try things on for size and see if it works for you.”

Regulation isn’t about copying routines or forcing “the solution du jour.” It’s about discovering practices that genuinely calm your system. Whether it’s nature, music, movement, or meditation, the right fit fosters resilience, flexibility, and authentic joy.

Connections:

Visit Esin’s Website

Visit us: MarniBattista.Com
Ready To Create Your Corporate Escape Plan? Book A Call With Me
Take the Quiz: Unlock the shocking truth about how your unique personality type is silently shaping your future
Buy Your Radical Living Challenge: 7 Questions For Living The Meaningful Life