Shame spirals: we all know them, we all hate them, and most of us try to outrun them. In this raw, revealing, and hilariously honest conversation, Finn and Dr. Sarah break down what a shame spiral really is, where these intense emotional reactions come from, and why they often have deep roots in childhood patterns. Using Sarah’s real-life moment of “F-bomb shame” as a jumping-off point, the duo explores how old wounds get activated, why our reactions can feel so outsized, and what it takes to recover with compassion, clarity, and grounded truth.Takeaways

• Shame spirals often signal past trauma or early developmental wounds.

• Overreactions usually mean the present moment has touched an old story.

• Self-compassion is the antidote to shame—not self-punishment.“Pull the lens back”: most shame triggers aren’t life-altering in reality

• Healing requires understanding, kindness, and choosing not to re-abuse yourself.

• Key Timestamps

  • [00:00] – Welcome back: what shame spirals feel like

• • [01:00] – Recognizing hidden vs. overt shame

  • [02:00] – The “speaking regret” shame spiral

  • [03:00] – Sarah’s F-bomb video story & activation

  • [06:00] – Childhood memories that amplify present shame

  • [10:00] – Tools: pulling back the lens, practicing self-compassion

  • [12:00] – Finn’s shame around talking too much in groups

  • [15:00] – Trauma origins of shame patterns

• • [18:00] – Healing, compassion, and the parent-you-needed approach

  Notable Resources & Guest Links

  • Dr. Sarah Michaud, PsyD — Author of Co Crazy

• • Leaving CrazyTown YouTube Channel

  • Website: https://drsarahmichaud.com/

  Subscribe, rate, and review Codependency Recovery: Leaving CrazyTown.Share this episode with someone who spirals into shame and needs real-talk tools to get out.

  Codependency Recovery: Leaving CrazyTown is a raw, real-talk podcast hosted by Finn and Dr. Sarah Michaud. With humor, honesty, and a healthy dose of clinical insight, they tackle the chaos of dysfunctional relationships and offer real tools for healing. Subscribe wherever you listen and follow @LeavingCrazyTown on social media for more real-talk recovery content.

  
  

When we don’t know how to ask for what we need, we manipulate, avoid, or overextend. In this powerful and painfully relatable episode, Finn and Dr. Sarah unpack how fear of rejection fuels codependent behaviors—and how to finally break the cycle. From “polite lying” to people-pleasing to emotional seduction, they explore what drives us to control outcomes instead of asking directly for what we want. The truth? Authentic connection only happens when we stop trying to manage other people’s feelings and start telling the truth about our own.

Takeaways

• Fear of rejection is the root of many manipulative and codependent behaviors.

• You can’t build trust when your words and energy don’t match—people feel the fear underneath.

• Saying “no” to a request isn’t rejection of you; it’s just a no to that thing.

• Authentic requests lead to authentic relationships. Manipulation always breeds distance.

• Recovery means tolerating discomfort, setting clear boundaries, and staying in your own hula hoop.

Key Timestamps

• [00:01:00] Childhood patterns that teach us to manipulate instead of ask

• [00:03:00] Fear of rejection and why we avoid hearing “no”

• [00:06:00] How manipulation erodes trust and safety in relationships

• [00:08:00] The energy of fear—why people feel dishonesty before they hear it

• [00:12:00] Taking risks: why direct requests are a practice in courage and recovery

• Notable Resources

  Dr. Sarah Michaud’s book Co Crazy

• Follow Finn and Sarah on YouTube: @LeavingCrazyTown

• Additional tools and resources: www.drsarahmichaud.com
  

• If you loved this episode, subscribe and leave a review—it helps others find the show. And share it with that friend who always says “I’m fine” but clearly isn’t.
  

  Codependency Recovery: Leaving CrazyTown is a raw, real-talk podcast hosted by Finn and Dr. Sarah Michaud, two recovering addicts turned relatable guides on the wild ride of codependency healing. This isn’t your average recovery show—it’s part laughter, part therapy, and all truth. Subscribe wherever you listen and join us as we break out of CrazyTown—one honest conversation at a time.
  

In this powerful and deeply human episode, Dr. Sarah sits down with Jamie H from Tennessee — a recovering alcoholic who turned his pain into purpose by helping women rebuild their lives through sober living. From childhood trauma and abuse to relapse, surrender, and radical forgiveness, Jamie shares how accepting responsibility for his healing set him free. His story is raw, redemptive, and full of hope — proof that no matter how dark it gets, recovery offers a way through.

Takeaways

• Forgiveness isn’t weakness — it’s freedom.

• “As long as I don’t drink or drug, I have a chance to get to the other side.”

• Recovery begins with accepting the truth of who we are

• The hardest words in healing: “It’s me, not them.”

• Pain from the past can be transformed through surrender and service.

Key Timestamps

[00:00] Welcome from Dr. Sarah — setting up today’s conversation

[02:00] Jamie’s first surrender and relapse story

[05:00] Accepting addiction as a mental illness

[09:00] The cost of denial — relapse and loss

[11:00] Jamie’s childhood trauma and family history

[16:00] Betrayal, forgiveness, and seeing through new “spiritual glasses”

[20:00] Letting go of resentment and reclaiming power [27:00] Jamie’s top tips for staying sober — no matter what

Notable Resources or Guest Links

• Dr. Sarah Michaud, Author of Co Crazy

• Jamie H’s Women’s Sober Living Community (Tennessee)

• Follow @LeavingCrazyTown on YouTube

CTA If this story moved you, share it with someone who’s ready to let go of resentment and find freedom in forgiveness. Subscribe, rate, and review — your support helps others discover hope beyond codependency.

Codependency Recovery: Leaving CrazyTown is the raw, real-talk podcast hosted by Finn and Dr. Sarah Michaud — two recovering addicts turned relatable guides on the wild ride of codependency healing. Come for the truth bombs, stay for the laughter, and leave with a renewed sense of agency.