Discover the story behind Hastings Traditional Jack in the Green in this imaginative Podcast. Written by Patrick J. A. Knight with respect for the history and folklore of and around Jack in the Green. Supplemented with the beautiful music of Gravity Noir. During the 13 episodes story we are introduced to all kinds of mystical, magical and, above all colorful, imaginative individuals. In this way, the chimney sweeps, the green men, the milkmaids and the red drummer boy also get their own story told in a playful way.

Jack in the Green Spotify Podcast

Jack in the Green Album (Spotify)

Jack in the Green Feature film:

YouTube World Premiere May 1, 2025 at 5:30 AM (Sunrise)

GRAVITY NOIR HOMEPAGE

HASTINGS TRADITIONAL JACK IN THE GREEN HOME PAGE

Patrick J. A. Knight© 2025 A Gravity ProductionUPC/EAN 195999044095ISAN: 0000-0007-64EF-0000-4-0000-0000-P

Part 13 of Jack in the Green,

Once the parade made it to the top of the hill, Jack was lifted upon the stage by the bogies. “What shall we do with Jack in the green? “, the bogies asked the excited crowd. “Slay him, Slay him!”, the crowd chanted. The bogies started to strike Jack in the green with large sticks. Thousands of ivy leaves started to fly up in the air and over the cheerful crowd. Every single person got hold of precisely one leaf. Spring made her appearance and told the good folk of Hastings, “This single leaf you are holding will protect you and bring you luck”. She added “Those who were greedy and have kept more than one leaf, will get the same as Jack and will turn into a walking talking bush until next year and have to wait to be slain”. Luckily no-one had grabbed more than one leaf and if they did, they would pass it on to someone else who hadn’t caught one. Giving them even more luck for the year. So spring was very happy indeed and kept her promise. Jack was left unharmed and again he was the young man his parents were so proud of. His mother said “You might not have noticed Jack, but you are still completely naked. Good job I brought one of your pants”. The crowd all laughed and Jack just giggled shyly. Spring made sure Jack’s mum wonfirst prize with this year’s garland contest. After all, the crown she had made was the most beautiful one she had ever seen. And Jack’s dad started receiving loads and loads of orders to sweep people’s chimneys. Their business was booming again and it never been so busy. They made so much money that year, including the prize money they had won. They could finally afford to get everything fixed in their cottage, including Jack’s bedroom curtains! And now that this story is coming to an end... The good people of Hastings traditionally celebrate their Jack in the green at the beginning of May each year. Keeping the story alive.

Note: The song and video 'Jack in the Green' has been refused to be used in this podcast episode by Spotify policy (Too much music). But don't worry, the full feature film and audio album of 'Jack in the Green' will soon be available via all official channels. (Click link below or here)

YouTube World Premiere May 1, 2025 at 5:30 AM (Sunrise)

Sing-a-long with song 'Get in your pants, Jack old boy':

(Verse 1)

Jack in the green, feeling giggly and shy,

Standing nude in front of the crowd, oh my!

The villagers cheer, with laughter and glee,

As Jack tries to hide, behind a big tree.

(Chorus)

Get in your pants, Jack old boy,

Hide that bottom for everyone to see.

Get in your pants, Jack old boy,

Oh, what a funny sight, you must agree.

(Verse 2)

His mum brought him pants, but they were too tight,

Jack struggled and wriggled with all his might.

He tried to pull them up, but they wouldn't go,

His cheeky bottom made it quite a show.

(Chorus)

Get in your pants, Jack old boy,

Hide that bottom for everyone to see.

Get in your pants, Jack old boy,

Oh, what a funny sight, you must agree.

(Bridge)

Joyce his girlfriend, with a giggle and a grin,

Watching Jack's antics, as he tried to fit in.

She cheered him on, with a playful shout,

"Come on, Jack, you can figure it out!"

(Repeat Chorus)

(Verse 3)

He tried to use a rope, to pull them up high,

But the pants got stuck, oh what a try!

He even tried butter, to slide them on,

But Jack's cheeky bottom just wouldn't be gone.

(Chorus)

Get in your pants, Jack old boy,

Hide that bottom for everyone to see.

Get in your pants, Jack old boy,

Oh, what a funny sight, you must agree.

(Outro)

So Jack in the green, with a laugh and a cheer,

Finally got his pants on, and the crowd did cheer.

With Joyce by his side, and a smile so bright,

Jack in the green, was a funny sight.

(Repeat Chorus)

Story, music andlyrics by Patrick J. A. Knight PatrickJ. A. Knight©2025 A Gravity Production

UPC/EAN195999044095

ISAN: 0000-0007-64EF-0000-4-0000-0000-P

Part 12 of Jack in the Green,

Also just outside of Hastings, there lived a little boy named Tommy. He was very poor and didn't have much, but he did have a little drum that he loved dearly. Every day, he would play his drum as he searched for leftovers in garbage cans and animal troughs to fill his hungry tummy. On the day of the parade, as Tommy was wandering through the village, he spotted a large barrel filled with ripe, juicy tomatoes. His curiosity got the best of him, and he just had to take a closer look. The barrel was so big that Tommy had to climb on top to see inside. As he peered into the barrel, Tommy lost his balance and slipped! With a loud splash, he fell right into the barrel of tomatoes. When he finally managed to climb out, he was completely covered in tomato juice, turning him bright red from head to toe. Tommy couldn't help but laugh at himself. He picked up his drum and started playing a cheerful tune as he walked back to the village. The villagers were still cheering on the parade when they saw Tommy, the little red drummer, marching through the streets. The sight of Tommy, all red and playing his drum, was so funny that the villagers couldn't stop laughing. They gathered around him, clapping and cheering. Some of them even started throwing coins to the little red drummer, finding his performance delightful. Tommy was overjoyed! He had never seen so much money in his life. With the coins he collected, he was able to buy himself some decent food and even shared some with other children in the village. From that day on, Tommy became known as the little red drummer who brought laughter and joy to the village. And every time he played his drum, the villagers would remember the funny sight of Tommy covered in tomatoes and smile.

Sing-a-long with the 'The Little Red Drummer Song':

(Verse 1)

Just outside of Hastings, lived a boy named Tommy,

He was very poor, but his drum made him jolly.

Every day he'd play, searching high and low,

For leftovers in garbage cans, to help his tummy grow.

(Chorus)

Little red drummer boy, marching through the town,

Covered in tomatoes, never wearing a frown.

Little red drummer boy, playing with delight,

Bringing joy and laughter, always looking bright.

(Verse 2)

On the day of the parade, Tommy wandered near,

He saw a barrel of tomatoes, juicy and clear.

Curiosity got him, he climbed up to peek,

But he slipped and fell in, with a splash and a squeak!

(Chorus)

Little red drummer boy, marching through the town,

Covered in tomatoes, never wearing a frown.

Little red drummer boy, playing with delight,

Bringing joy and laughter, such a funny sight.

(Bridge)

Tommy climbed out, all red from head to toe,

He laughed at himself, and started to go.

Playing his drum, with a cheerful tune,

The villagers saw him, and laughed all afternoon.

(Chorus)

Little red drummer boy, marching through the town,

Covered in tomatoes, never wearing a frown.

Little red drummer boy, playing with delight,

Bringing joy and laughter, always looking bright.

(Verse 3)

The villagers gathered, clapping with glee,

Throwing coins to Tommy, what a sight to see.

With the money he earned, he bought food to share,

With other children in the village, showing he cared.

(Chorus)

Little red drummer boy, marching through the town,

Covered in tomatoes, never wearing a frown.

Little red drummer boy, playing with delight,

Bringing joy and laughter, such a funny sight.

(Outro)

From that day on, Tommy was known,

As the little red drummer, who brought joy alone.

Every time he played, the villagers would smile,

Remembering the funny sight, that lasted for a while.

(Chorus)

Little red drummer boy, marching through the town,

Covered in tomatoes, never wearing a frown.

Little red drummer boy, playing with delight,

Bringing joy and laughter, such a funny sight

Story, music and lyrics by Patrick J. A. Knight PatrickJ. A. Knight©2025 A Gravity Production

UPC/EAN 195999044095

ISAN: 0000-0007-64EF-0000-4-0000-0000-P

Part 11 of Jack in the Green,

In the charming village of Hastings, there lived a group of cheerful milkmaids. These milkmaids were known for their delicious milk and their joyful singing as they went about their daily chores. Every morning, they would gather in the village square, ready to deliver fresh milk to the villagers. During the parade, as the milkmaids were preparing their milk cans, they noticed something strange. The cows in the pasture were acting very peculiar. Instead of grazing peacefully, they were dancing around in circles and mooing in a funny tune. The milkmaids couldn't help but giggle at the sight. "What's gotten into the cows today?" asked Daisy, the youngest milkmaid. "I don't know," replied Bessie, the oldest milkmaid. "But it looks like they're having a lot of fun!" As the milkmaids approached the cows, they discovered the source of the commotion. A mischievous little fairy named Tilly had sprinkled some magical fairy dust on the cows, making them dance and sing. Tilly was known for her playful tricks, and she loved to bring laughter to the village. "Hello, milkmaids!" Tilly giggled as she fluttered around. "I thought the cows could use a little bit of fun today!" The milkmaids laughed and thanked Tilly for the delightful surprise. They decided to join in the fun and started dancing and singing along with the cows in the parade. The villagers around, clapping and cheering at the hilarious sight of dancing cows and milkmaids. From that day on, the milkmaids and the villagers of Hastings always looked forward to Tilly's playful visits. They knew that whenever Tilly was around, there would be plenty of laughter and joy. And so, the milkmaids of Hastings continued to spread happiness with their delicious milk and their cheerful spirits, always ready for the next magical surprise.

Sing-a-long with 'The Milkmaids Song':

(Verse 1)

In the village of Hastings, where the milkmaids sing,

They deliver fresh milk, and joy they bring.

One sunny morning, as they gathered 'round,

They noticed the cows, dancing on the ground.

(Chorus)

Oh, the milkmaids laughed, what a funny sight,

Cows dancing in circles, mooing with delight.

Thanks to Tilly's magic, the village had fun,

With dancing cows and milkmaids, under the sun.

(Verse 2)

Daisy asked Bessie, "What's going on today?"

The cows are having fun, in a magical way.

Tilly the fairy, with her playful tricks,

Sprinkled fairy dust, and the cows did kicks.

(Chorus)

Oh, the milkmaids laughed, what a funny sight,

Cows dancing in circles, mooing with delight.

Thanks to Tilly's magic, the village had fun,

With dancing cows and milkmaids, under the sun.

(Bridge)

The villagers gathered, clapping with cheer,

At the sight of the cows, dancing so near.

The milkmaids joined in, singing a tune,

Dancing with the cows, from morning till noon.

(Chorus)

Oh, the milkmaids laughed, what a funny sight,

Cows dancing in circles, mooing with delight.

Thanks to Tilly's magic, the village had fun,

With dancing cows and milkmaids, under the sun.

(Verse 3)

On May Day processions, the milkmaids would go,

With milk pails decorated, in a beautiful show.

Over time, the pails turned to headdresses so bright,

As they danced through the village, in the morning light.

(Chorus)

Oh, the milkmaids laughed, what a funny sight,

Cows dancing in circles, mooing with delight.

Thanks to Tilly's magic, the village had fun,

With dancing cows and milkmaids, under the sun.

(Outro)

So in Hastings, they wait for Tilly's next trick,

For laughter and joy, that always comes quick.

The milkmaids spread happiness, with every chore,

In the charming village, forevermore.

(Chorus)

Oh, the milkmaids laughed, what a funny sight,

Cows dancing in circles, mooing with delight.

Thanks to Tilly's magic, the village had fun,

With dancing cows and milkmaids, under the sun.

Story, music and lyrics by Patrick J. A. Knight PatrickJ. A. Knight©2025 A Gravity Production

UPC/EAN 195999044095

ISAN: 0000-0007-64EF-0000-4-0000-0000-P

Part 10 of Jack in the Green,

When Jack made his appearance, the people cheered out loud “Hooray for spring, hooray for spring’s surprise, hooray for our Jack in the green!”. Music was played, Morris dancers waved their handkerchiefs in the air and the parade made its way dancing through the beautifully decorated streets of Hastings heading towards the top of the hill. And all the way up front was Jack, not frightened at all for what was to come. After all, spring had promised him that he would not beharmed. He was also protected by these green men. So he laughed and danced along with all the people he knew so well. The sun tickled his nose and made Jack sneeze. “Haatchoo!”. The sneeze caused some of his ivy leaves to touch a couple more people and by magic, they turned green. “Oh look”, Jack said laughing, “That’s so funny, they came from my nose. So I will call all of the green men, my bogies!”. The bogies continued to protect Jack in the green on his way to the top of the hill. And whoever tried to hurt Jack in the slightest way would be touched on the nose by one of the bogies, turning them completely green.

Sing-a-long with 'The Bogie Song':

(Verse 1)

In the streets of Hastings, the Morris dancers prance,

Waving handkerchiefs in the air, joining in the dance.

The town is decorated, with flowers all around,

And Jack in the green leads the parade, with a crown so profound.

(Chorus)

The bogie song and we're all bogies,

Dancing through the streets, like a bunch of yogis.

When Jack sneezes, watch out, my friend,

His green leaves turn you into bogies, till the very end.

Bogies, bogies, bogies we are.

(Verse 2)

The villagers are cheering, as the parade goes by,

With Jack in the front, reaching for the sky.

But when he sneezes, oh what a sight,

Spectators turn green, in the morning light.

(Chorus)

The bogie song and we're all bogies,

Dancing through the streets, like a bunch of yogis.

When Jack sneezes, watch out, my friend,

His green leaves turn you into bogies, till the very end.

Bogies, bogies, bogies we are.

(Bridge)

They try to guide Jack, to the top of the hill,

But he's so big, it's quite a thrill.

They push and they pull, with all their might,

To get Jack through the door, it's a funny sight.

(Chorus)

The bogie song and we're all bogies,

Dancing through the streets, like a bunch of yogis.

When Jack sneezes, watch out, my friend,

His green leaves turn you into bogies, till the very end.

Bogies, bogies, bogies we are.

(Verse 3)

The green men are laughing, as they march along,

Singing and dancing, to the bogie song.

With Jack in the lead, they make their way,

To the top of the hill, on this special day.

(Chorus)

The bogie song and we're all bogies,

Dancing through the streets, like a bunch of yogis.

When Jack sneezes, watch out, my friend,

His green leaves turn you into bogies, till the very end.

Bogies, bogies, bogies we are.

(Outro)

So if you visit Hastings, on the 1st of May,

Join the parade, and dance away.

With Jack in the green, milkmaid's, chimney sweeps

and bogies toooooooooo,

It's a funny celebration, just for you.

(Chorus)

The bogie song and we're all bogies,

Dancing through the streets, like a bunch of yogis.

When Jack sneezes, watch out, my friend,

His green leaves turn you into bogies, till the very end.

Bogies, bogies, bogies we are.

Story, music and lyrics by Patrick J. A. Knight PatrickJ. A. Knight©2025 A Gravity Production

UPC/EAN 195999044095

ISAN: 0000-0007-64EF-0000-4-0000-0000-P

Part 9 of Jack in the Green,

In the early morning of the 1st of May, way before the break of dawn, everyone in the village got themselves ready for the big festivities. They put on their finest clothes and wore the most beautiful garlands they had made. They remembered what spring had told them and gathered near the seafront. They stood and watched with anticipation, to find out where exactly the first ray of sunshine would fall. It was a very special moment when they all saw one particular cottage light up in the first ray of sunlight. They ran as fast as they could towards the cottage and knocked on the front door. Jack’s mother opened the door and said “We know what you have come looking for. You will find springs surprise in Jack’s room”. Some of the neighbours went inside while the other villagers waited outside. They just couldn’t believe their eyes and were left speechless. Before them, stood this massive walking talking Jack in the green. On top of this large cone-shaped bush rested the most beautiful crown made of flowers, which Jack’s mother had made. They couldn’t wait to touch the mysterious living bush, but before Jack could warn his neighbours, they had become covered with ivy, turning them completely green. Jack explained and said, “You all will be ok, just make sure you get me safe on top of the hill. Once you have slain me, the spirit of summer will be released and the curse lifted”. Mother replied, “Go on son, make us all proud!”. The green men guided Jack outside, but because he was so big, he hardly managed to fit through the front door.

Sing-a-long with the song 'Get Jack through the door':

(Verse 1)

Jack was turned by Spring, into a walking, talking bush,

With a crown of flowers, he was quite the lush.

Whoever touched Jack, turned green from head to toe,

Now the green men had a problem, how to make him go.

(Chorus)

Get Jack through the door, oh what a sight,

Trying every trick, from morning till night.

With laughter and cheer, they gave it their best,

Getting Jack outside was quite the quest.

(Verse 2)

They tried to push and pull, but Jack was just too wide,

He barely fit the doorway, no matter how they tried.

They thought of using butter, to slide him through the gap,

But Jack just laughed and said, "I don't need a nap!"

(Chorus)

Get Jack through the door, oh what a sight,

Trying every trick, from morning till night.

With laughter and cheer, they gave it their best,

Getting Jack outside was quite the quest.

(Bridge)

They tried to tilt him sideways, but he got stuck halfway,

They even tried a trampoline, to bounce him out that day.

They thought of using ropes, to pull him like a sled,

But Jack just shook his branches, and laughed instead.

(Chorus)

Get Jack through the door, oh what a sight,

Trying every trick, from morning till night.

With laughter and cheer, they gave it their best,

Getting Jack outside was quite the quest.

(Verse 3)

They tried to use a saw, but the branches grew back fast,

They even tried a cannon, but that was quite a blast.

Finally, they decided, to widen the front door,

And Jack walked out with ease, like never before.

(Chorus)

Get Jack through the door, oh what a sight,

Trying every trick, from morning till night.

With laughter and cheer, they gave it their best,

Getting Jack outside was quite the quest.

(Outro)

So Jack and the green men, laughed and had some fun,

They learned that sometimes, teamwork gets things done.

With a crown of flowers, and a smile so bright,

Jack in the green, was a funny sight.

(Chorus)

Get Jack through the door, oh what a sight,

Trying every trick, from morning till night.

With laughter and cheer, they gave it their best,

Getting Jack outside was quite the quest.

Story, music and lyrics by Patrick J. A. Knight PatrickJ. A. Knight©2025 A Gravity Production

UPC/EAN 195999044095

ISAN: 0000-0007-64EF-0000-4-0000-0000-P

Part 8 of Jack in the Green,

Meanwhile, Jack’s parents still couldn’t believe what had happened. Their son Jack was no longer a young man, but a walking talking bush. Spring had also warned them they could not touch Jack with their bare hands. If they would, they would also change into green men. They tried everything. They even tried cutting down the branches, but they would only grow back in a split of a second. So all they could do was to carefully water their Jack in the green with a watering can daily. This way they kept Jack nice and fresh to keep him alive.

Note: The song and video 'Water Jack!' has been refused to be used in this podcast episode by Spotify policy (Too much music). But don't worry, the full feature film and audio album of 'Jack in the Green' will soon be available via all official channels.

Story, music and lyrics by Patrick J. A. Knight PatrickJ. A. Knight©2025 A Gravity Production

UPC/EAN 195999044095

ISAN: 0000-0007-64EF-0000-4-0000-0000-P

Part 7 of Jack in the Green,

It was just a few weeks away from the 1st of May and spring made sure she had grown enough extra flowers and ivy. So the rest of the villagers had the chance of making their own beautiful garland. Spring left the good people of Hastings a message that she had prepared a surprise for them this year. On the 1st of May, they would find her surprise inside a cottage. The one that would catch the first ray of sunshine that very morning.

Note: The song and video 'Spring has got a surprise' has been refused to be used in this podcast episode by Spotify policy (Too much music). But don't worry, the full feature film and audio album of 'Jack in the Green' will soon be available via all official channels.

Story, music and lyrics by Patrick J. A. Knight PatrickJ. A. Knight©2025 A Gravity Production

UPC/EAN 195999044095

ISAN: 0000-0007-64EF-0000-4-0000-0000-P