Dive in with me & Dr. Rebecca Simmons as we delve into the myth of Bluebeard, exploring its profound impact on personal growth, intuition, and the importance of listening to one's inner voice. We discuss the dangers of ignoring intuition, the cost of burying dreams, and the uncertainty that comes with self-discovery.

Download the free Bluebeard myth series study guide here: https://www.quinncurtis.com/oct-2024-free-study-guide

Our conversation emphasizes the distinction between dreams and fantasies, highlighting the vulnerability involved in pursuing true dreams. Ultimately, we encourage everyone listening to reclaim magic from darkness and embrace the richness that comes from facing one's fears and buried aspirations.

Top Takeaways

• Bluebeard is one of the most impactful myths for many.

• Myths and fairy tales shape our understanding of reality.

• The story of Bluebeard is not widely known in American culture.

• Intuition is crucial in navigating relationships and situations.

• Ignoring instincts can lead to dangerous outcomes.

• The myth illustrates the consequences of societal pressures on women.

• Buried dreams can lead to feelings of jealousy and anger.

• There is a distinction between dreams (core needs) and fantasies (unrealistic expectations).

• Pursuing dreams often requires vulnerability and risk.

• Facing darkness can lead to personal growth and magic.

NOTE: This is our final episode for Season 2 of the In Flow + On Fire podcast. Join us in 2025 for Season 3.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Bluebeard and Its Impact
02:53 Cultural Significance of Myths and Fairy Tales
06:05 Personal Connections to the Bluebeard Myth
08:45 Listening to Intuition and Self-Trust
11:46 The Role of Female Relationships
14:46 Historical Context and Cautionary Tales
17:50 The Cost of Ignoring Dreams
20:54 The Bleeding Key: Confronting Hidden Truths
23:49 The Aftermath of Discovery
26:50 Reclaiming Dreams and Facing Vulnerability
29:38 Balancing Physical and Psychological Security
32:32 The Distinction Between Dreams and Fantasies
35:35 The Importance of Vulnerability in Pursuing Dreams
38:26 Finding Time for Creativity
41:19 Final Thoughts on the Bluebeard Myth

Come with me & Kathy on a chilling and empowering exploration of the haunting tale of Bluebeard. We’re delving into themes of intuition, self-worth, and the societal conditioning of women. We discuss the importance of teaching children to trust their instincts, the impact of childhood experiences on self-doubt, and the complexities of identity.

Download the free Bluebeard myth series free study guide: https://www.quinncurtis.com/oct-2024-free-study-guide

Our conversation emphasizes the need for curiosity, the balance of masculine and feminine energies, and the urgency of living fully and authentically. Ultimately, we reflect on the importance of listening to one's intuition and the consequences of ignoring it, encouraging a deeper understanding of self and the courage to pursue dreams.

Top Takeaways

• The Bluebeard story reveals deep societal conditioning.

• Teaching children to trust their intuition is crucial.

• Parents play a significant role in nurturing self-worth.

• Ignoring intuition can lead to negative consequences.

• Friendship dilemmas often reflect deeper issues.

• Self-sabotage is a common struggle for many.

• The inner critic can undermine self-confidence.

• Childhood experiences shape our ability to trust ourselves.

• Shifting from shame to celebration can transform our mindset.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Connection

02:42 Exploring the Bluebeard Story

05:50 The Role of Intuition in Parenting

08:54 The Impact of Societal Conditioning

11:45 The Inner Critic and Self-Sabotage

14:58 Understanding Identity and Growth

17:39 The Importance of Vulnerability

20:35 Managing Perceptions and Safety

23:32 The Consequences of Ignoring Intuition

26:17 The Weight of Expectations

29:36 The Dichotomy of Strength and Weakness

32:21 The Journey of Self-Discovery

35:18 The Complexity of Values

38:04 The Burden of Being 'Good'

41:09 The Dangers of Rigidity

44:06 The Cost of Conformity

46:43 The Bleeding Key and Unacknowledged Truths

49:35 Final Reflections and Takeaways

Dive into the myth of Bluebeard with me & Calli as we explore its relevance to women's experiences and relationships. We discuss the importance of intuition, the impact of childhood trauma, and the complexities of understanding unhealthy dynamics in relationships.

Download the free Bluebeard study guide here: https://www.quinncurtis.com/oct-2024-free-study-guide

Our conversation emphasizes the need for self-discovery, healing the masculine and feminine within, and the power of storytelling in transforming beliefs and experiences. Ultimately, we highlight the journey towards wholeness and the significance of recognizing safe relationships.

Top Takeaways

• Bluebeard is a myth every woman should know.
• Trusting intuition is crucial in relationships.
• Childhood trauma can influence adult relationships.
• Bluebeard can manifest in both genders. - Healing requires understanding the inner Bluebeard.
• Self-compassion is essential for healing.
• The stories we tell ourselves shape our reality.
• Recognizing safe relationships is vital for well-being.
• Healing the masculine and feminine is transformative.
• Vulnerability is key to authentic connections.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Setting the Stage
01:17 The Potency of the Bluebeard Myth
05:15 The Impact of Trauma on Relationships
07:03 Discerning Safe Relationships
09:50 Healing the Bluebeard Within Masculine Energy
13:08 Letting Go of the Belief in Universal Safety
33:32 The Impact of Societal Conditioning
36:47 The Response to Hurting Someone
39:05 The Truth of the Masculine
44:47 The Power of Storytelling

Each month here on the In Flow + On Fire podcast all episodes are centered around a specific myth or fairy tale and how it relates to modern life and challenges.

Download the free Bluebeard myth series study guide here: https://www.quinncurtis.com/oct-2024-free-study-guide

This month we’re focusing on the “Bluebeard” fairy tale, which will help us explore the themes of recognizing and breaking free from the inner critic, predator, and killer of dreams.

Listen in to this episode to hear me reading my favorite version of the fairy tale, “Bluebeard” by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, from her book "Women Who Run with the Wolves."

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In this conversation, Quinn, Kathy, and Heidi discuss the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears and its deeper meaning. They reflect on their childhood experiences with the story and how their perspectives have changed as adults. They explore the concept of finding what's just right for oneself and the importance of self-worth, setting boundaries, and saying no. The conversation also touches on the dangers of perfectionism and black-and-white thinking, and the need to embrace the messy and adventurous aspects of life.

They discuss the Goldilocks Zone as a therapeutic concept to counter black-and-white thinking and find the middle way. They emphasize the importance of trusting oneself, embracing complexity, and letting go of societal expectations. The conversation explores the concept of finding what is 'just right' in life and embracing the middle path. It emphasizes the importance of giving ourselves permission to prioritize what feels right for us and to redefine success based on living by our values.

The discussion also touches on the significance of taking up space, accepting ourselves and others, and allowing our children to find their own path. The conversation encourages an experimental mindset, curiosity, and embracing life as an adventure.

Top Takeaways

Takeaways

• The story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears is more complex than it appears at first glance, with deeper themes of finding what's just right for oneself.

• As adults, the story resonates with the need to embrace the messy and adventurous aspects of life, set boundaries, and prioritize self-worth.

• Perfectionism and black-and-white thinking can hinder the ability to find what's just right and embrace the middle way.

• The Goldilocks Zone is a therapeutic concept that encourages finding the middle ground and embracing complexity.

• Trusting oneself, embracing complexity, and letting go of societal expectations are key to finding what's just right in life. Give yourself permission to prioritize what feels right for you and redefine success based on living by your values.

• Take up space and accept yourself as you are, and extend that acceptance to others.

• Allow your children to find their own path and support them along their journey.

• Embrace an experimental mindset and curiosity to discover what is 'just right' for you.

• View life as an adventure and approach it with excitement and openness.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Initial Thoughts on the Story
02:08 Reflecting on Personal Experiences with the Story
08:31 The Perfectionism Trap and the Rainbow Zone
10:23 Challenges of Finding What's Just Right
19:49 Embracing the Messy and Imperfect
23:01 The Goldilocks Zone and Black and White Thinking
31:53 Trusting Oneself and Feeling Deserving
33:39 Embracing the Middle Path
36:23 Taking Up Space
39:02 Living by Your Values
49:18 Life as an Adventure

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In this soul-filled conversation, Quinn and Calli discuss the themes and lessons from the Goldilocks story. They explore the fear of making wrong choices, the discomfort with experimentation, and the pressure to make the 'just right' choice. They also discuss the importance of feeling good and following what feels right for oneself, rather than chasing external validation or societal expectations. They emphasize the need to create safe spaces for each other to experiment and try things, and to trust our own feelings and intuition. Overall, the conversation highlights the importance of finding what feels good and living in alignment with our true selves.

Top Takeaways:

• The Goldilocks story brings up themes of fear of making wrong choices and discomfort with experimentation.
• There is pressure to make the 'just right' choice and a lack of flexibility to try different things.
• It is important to trust our own feelings and intuition and to create safe spaces for each other to experiment and try things.
• Finding what feels good and living in alignment with our true selves is crucial for personal fulfillment and happiness.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Background
03:25 The Discomfort with Experimentation
10:58 The Difference Between Looks and Feels
18:53 Trusting Your True Nature
27:11 The Importance of Feeling Safe and Connected
33:31 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

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Amber, an inspiring teacher, shares her journey and experiences in education. She emphasizes the importance of adapting and finding what's just right for each student. Amber also discusses her own career path and the challenges she faced in balancing her passion for music and teaching. She highlights the impact of arts programs on students' lives and the need for them to have a sense of belonging. Additionally, Amber opens up about her children's experiences as queer individuals and the support she provides them.

Amber emphasizes the importance of finding one's passion and loving what you do. She encourages adults to create a balance between work and play, and to live life to the fullest. She also highlights the need for adults to create a safe and supportive environment for young people, who often feel unseen and unsupported. Amber shares her approach of creating a welcoming and positive classroom environment, infusing joy into everyday activities, and building strong relationships with her students. She urges adults to keep hope for the younger generation and to provide them with opportunities to thrive.

This episode is part of our Goldilocks & the 3 Bears Fairy Tale series where we're diving deep into issues around the power of choice and finding what's "just right" for us.

Top Takeaways

• Adapting and finding what's just right for each student is crucial in education.

• Arts programs provide a sense of belonging and valuable experiences for students.

• Supporting and embracing children's queer identities is essential.

• Balancing personal passions and professional responsibilities can be challenging.

• The stakes and pressures in education and parenting are higher than ever. Find your passion and love what you do.

• Create a balance between work and play.

• Live life to the fullest and make it memorable.

• Create a safe and supportive environment for young people.

• Infuse joy into everyday activities.

• Build strong relationships with students.

• Keep hope for the younger generation and provide them with opportunities to thrive.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Appreciation
08:03 Finding Balance: The Key to Longevity in Teaching
14:34 Supporting Students on the Queer Spectrum: Love and Acceptance
18:47 Education as a Lifelong Journey: Finding What's Just Right
24:32 Creating a Safe and Supportive Environment
32:34 Finding Joy and Fulfillment in Your Career
35:52 Striving for Work-Life Balance
45:12 Having Hope for the Younger Generation

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In this conversation, Quinn and Rebecca discuss their initial impressions of the story of Goldilocks and how it has evolved over time. They explore themes of boundaries, curiosity, innocence, and the fear of making the wrong choices. They also discuss the impact of societal expectations on women's choices and the struggles women face in terms of contraception and reproductive health. Rebecca shares insights from her work in family planning and highlights the burden and stigma associated with contraceptive use. They emphasize the importance of respecting women's choices and the need for a more supportive and understanding society. Pregnancy is a risky condition, and it's important to understand the high level of risk involved. People who have an unwanted pregnancy are less likely to take good care of themselves, which can lead to negative outcomes. It's crucial to support individuals in making their own choices and to recognize that there is no one right path. The Goldilocks myth represents the struggle of choosing and the impact our choices have on others. Women's reproductive issues and sexual health are significant choices with high consequences and risks. It's important for women to be educated and empowered in these areas.

Top Takeaways

• Initial impressions of stories, like Goldilocks, can shape our understanding of archetypes and morality.

• The story of Goldilocks raises questions about boundaries, curiosity, innocence, and the fear of making the wrong choices.

• Women face societal expectations and judgment when it comes to their choices, particularly in areas like contraception and reproductive health.

• The burden and stigma associated with contraceptive use can have a significant impact on women's lives.

• Respecting women's choices and creating a supportive society is crucial for empowering women and ensuring their well-being. Pregnancy is a high-risk condition, and it's important to understand the level of risk involved.

• People with unwanted pregnancies are less likely to take good care of themselves, leading to negative outcomes.

• Support individuals in making their own choices and recognize that there is no one right path.

• The Goldilocks myth represents the struggle of choosing and the impact our choices have on others.

• Women's reproductive issues and sexual health are significant choices with high consequences and risks.

• It's important for women to be educated and empowered in these areas.

Rebecca Simmons, PhD, MPH is a Research Assistant Professor at the University of Utah in the Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology. Dr. Simmons directs the evaluation for the statewide contraceptive initiative, Family Planning Elevated, and works on other implementation research, including HER Salt Lake. Her research interests and expertise include fertility awareness-based methods, comprehensive contraceptive access, health technology, and implementation science.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Background
03:03 Initial Impressions of Goldilocks
06:19 Boundaries, Curiosity, and the Fear of Making Wrong Choices
09:59 Societal Expectations and Burdens on Girls and Women
12:48 Challenges in Finding the Right Contraception Method
16:42 The Stigma and Judgment Surrounding Women's Choices
21:27 The Negative Impact of Unwanted Pregnancy
26:44 Educating Women and Bringing Compassion
30:16 Embracing the Goldilocks Moment
34:54 Being an Alive Version of Ourselves
37:24 Dealing with Overbearing Perceptions
43:18 The Bears as Guides to Rewilding
46:14 Making Your Own Choices and Embracing Change