If you're really concerned about saving money in your divorce, then you need The Divorce Crash Course- it will save you THOUSANDS. Get it here.

If your ex or the other side is telling you that your divorce lawyer “isn’t doing their job”… don’t panic just yet.

In this episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, Andrea Rappaport and Morgan Stogsdill break down one of the most common—and manipulative—tactics used during divorce: making you doubt your own attorney.

You’ll learn why the other side often blames your lawyer when they’re feeling pressure, how this tactic is used to gain leverage, and how to tell the difference between strategy and an actual problem with your legal representation.

Because while it can happen… most of the time, it’s not what you think.

• Why your ex says your lawyer isn’t doing their job
• How “splitting” is used to create doubt and gain leverage
• When this happens most (mediation, proposals, pressure moments)
• Why lack of response can actually be a legal strategy
• How to avoid spiraling and wasting money reacting emotionally
• The real signs your divorce lawyer might actually be the problem
• When to trust the process vs. when to question it

Just because the other side says your lawyer is the problem…

👉 doesn’t make it true.

In fact, it may mean:

👉 your lawyer is doing something right—and they’re feeling the pressure.

• Your lawyer consistently misses deadlines
• You’re not getting responses within a reasonable timeframe
• Opposing counsel repeatedly calls out real deficiencies
• Judges or mediators are pushing back on your attorney’s position

👉 One comment = noise

👉 A pattern = something to evaluate

Want to stop second-guessing everything and start making smarter decisions?

👉 Get the Divorce Crash Course:

https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course

👉 Listen to more episodes:

https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/podcast

Our Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck

Friends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.

Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorce

Follow Andrea: @theandrearappaport

Follow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago

Mentioned in this episode:

Natural Cycles

When your body feels unpredictable, your decisions shouldn’t have to be. Get insight and clarity with NC° Perimenopause. Visit Naturalcycles.app/divorce to learn more and save on a subscription and wearable.

Natural Cycles

Get the Divorce Crash Course and grab your Balance Sheet Template here!

Struggling to get what you want in your divorce? You’re not alone—and the problem may not be what you’re asking for, but how you’re negotiating.

In this mini episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, Andrea Rappaport and Morgan Stogsdill break down one of the most common (and costly) mistakes people make during divorce negotiations—and how to fix it.

Using a real-life example of “Chad and Brenda,” they explain why disorganized settlement proposals, scattered responses, and multiple documents can quickly derail progress, increase stress, and cost you time and money.

You’ll learn how to stay aligned in negotiations, keep proposals clear, and use simple visual tools—like structured documents and balance sheets—to track progress and make smarter decisions.

• How to negotiate effectively in divorce
• Why responding within the same proposal structure matters
• The biggest mistake people make in settlement negotiations
• How to avoid confusion and “losing track” during back-and-forth offers
• Why using one document or balance sheet can simplify the entire process
• How visual organization can reduce stress and improve outcomes

Divorce negotiations aren’t just about what you ask for—they’re about how clearly and strategically you communicate.

When everything is organized in one place, you make better decisions, avoid unnecessary conflict, and move the process forward more efficiently.

Want a simple way to organize your divorce finances and negotiations?

👉 Grab the Divorce Crash Course (includes a balance sheet template designed to help you stay clear and in control):

https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course

Divorce is a marathon, not a sprint. Staying organized, asking the right questions, and using the right tools can make all the difference.

You’ve got this—and we’ve got you.

Our Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck

Friends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.

Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorce

Follow Andrea: @theandrearappaport

Follow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago

Mentioned in this episode:

Natural Cycles

When your body feels unpredictable, your decisions shouldn’t have to be. Get insight and clarity with NC° Perimenopause. Visit Naturalcycles.app/divorce to learn more and save on a subscription and wearable.

Natural Cycles

Get the Divorce Crash Course

You might not want to hear this… but you need to.

If your divorce feels more stressful than it should, you might be part of the problem—and it likely comes down to unrealistic expectations.

In this episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, hosts Andrea Rappaport and Morgan Stogsdill break down the most common ways clients unintentionally make their divorce harder, more expensive, and more emotionally draining.

From expecting your attorney to respond immediately… to assuming you’ll get full custody… to chasing a “forensic accountant fantasy”… this episode is your reality check.

Because divorce is emotional—but the legal system is procedural. And when your expectations don’t match how the system actually works, it creates unnecessary stress, frustration, and costly mistakes.

• Why expecting immediate responses from your attorney is setting you up for frustration
• What actually qualifies as a legal “emergency” (and what doesn’t)
• Why most people don’t need a forensic accountant (and when you actually do)
• The truth about full custody and how courts really make decisions
• Why divorce timelines are not in your control
• How unrealistic expectations increase your anxiety—and your legal bills

Divorce isn’t just hard because of your ex.

It’s hard because of the expectations you bring into it.

When you shift your mindset and understand what you can—and can’t—control, the entire process becomes more manageable.

Want more real, no-BS divorce advice?

👉 Get full episode breakdowns, strategy, and resources here:

https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/advice

Our Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck

Friends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.

Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorce

Follow Andrea: @theandrearappaport

Follow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago

Mentioned in this episode:

Natural Cycles

When your body feels unpredictable, your decisions shouldn’t have to be. Get insight and clarity with NC° Perimenopause. Visit Naturalcycles.app/divorce to learn more and save on a subscription and wearable.

Natural Cycles