Send Gemma a message

This episode is a special one - I’m sharing the audio from a recent live masterclass where I walk you through the deeper psychological patterns that drive attraction, and why insight alone often isn’t enough to change them.

If you’ve ever found yourself drawn to emotionally unavailable, avoidant, or self-absorbed partners - even when you know better - this episode will help you understand why.

I explore what’s happening beneath the surface, and what it actually takes to begin shifting these patterns from the inside out.

What you’ll learn

• Why high chemistry is not always a sign of compatibility
• The “love paradox” - wanting one thing, but being pulled toward something very different
• How your early schemas (core emotional patterns) shape who you’re drawn to
• What schema chemistry is and why attraction can feel so compelling - even when it’s not right for you
• The role of people-pleasing, self-sacrifice, and loss of voice in dating
• Why “just date more” or “choose better” doesn’t solve the problem
• The key stages involved in breaking long-standing relationship patterns
• How to begin rewriting your “love template” so you can move toward emotionally available partners

This episode is for you if…

• You keep finding yourself in similar relationship dynamics
• You’ve dated emotionally unavailable or avoidant men
• You struggle to trust yourself in dating
• You tend to over-give, over-accommodate, or lose yourself in relationships
• You’re ready to understand why this keeps happening - and start doing things differently

These patterns are not random - they are shaped by deeper, often unconscious processes. And once you understand them, you can begin to shift them.

Want to go deeper?

If this episode resonates, I also share more about my Love Wisely group coaching program inside this training.

It’s a 12-week experience designed to help you:

• Understand your patterns clearly
• Work with your schemas
• Build self-trust
• And begin relating in a way that supports the kind of relationship you actually want

Support the show

🩷 Love Wisely - DOORS OPEN NOW🎉🎉

🎁 Dating With Insight - FREE Guide

💛 Elevate You Worth: Self-Worth Healing Bundle

🚩 The Red Flag Project 🚩 Get Instant Access

Connect with Me

📩hello@drgemmagladstone.com 🌐 Website: drgemmagladstone.com
📷 Instagram: @drgemmacoaching

🌻 Support the Podcast 🙏
Love the show? Help us keep going with a monthly contribution: Support here

Send Gemma a message

If dating tends to bring up anxiety, self-doubt, people-pleasing, or the urge to lose yourself in someone else, this episode is for you.

In this practical episode, I’m speaking directly to women who tend to be very giving, very empathic, and very accommodating in relationships, but who often struggle to stay connected to themselves while dating.

If you have a history of subjugation, self-sacrifice, under-entitlement, loose boundaries, or worrying too much about being “too much” or “too needy,” dating can quickly become stressful and confusing. You may find yourself focusing more on whether the other person likes you than on how you actually feel.

In this episode, I walk you through 10 clear dating rules to help you feel calmer, more grounded, and more self-protective in the early stages of dating, without becoming closed off or guarded.

This is about dating in a way that helps you stay connected to your own needs, your own feelings, and your own experience.

In this episode, I cover:

• Why meeting early in real life is better than building a false sense of connection through endless texting
• Why first dates should be short, simple, and low pressure
• The importance of putting a time boundary around early dates
• Why alcohol can make it harder to stay connected to your instincts and boundaries
• Why you do not need to extend a date unless you genuinely want to
• Why it is healthy to directly say you’d like to see someone again if that is true for you
• Why it matters to keep your life running normally when you meet someone new
• Why rushing physical intimacy can create attachment before real compatibility is clear
• How to think about chemistry more wisely, especially if you have a pattern of schema chemistry
• Why the most important question after a date is not “Did they like me?” but “How did I feel?”

Key themes in this episode:

This episode explores how schemas such as subjugation, self-sacrifice, abandonment, emotional deprivation, and under-entitlement can quietly shape the dating process.

It also highlights a more grounded and emotionally healthy approach to dating:

Dating is data.

Rather than treating every date like a test of your worth, this episode encourages you to slow down, gather information, notice how you feel, and assess whether the other person is truly right for you.

If this episode resonated:

If you’ve been enjoying the podcast, I’d be so grateful if you left a quick review on Apple Podcasts. It really does help more women find the show.

And if this episode made you think of someone in your life, feel free to share it with them.

Support the show

🩷 Love Wisely - DOORS OPEN NOW🎉🎉

🎁 Dating With Insight - FREE Guide

💛 Elevate You Worth: Self-Worth Healing Bundle

🚩 The Red Flag Project 🚩 Get Instant Access

Connect with Me

📩hello@drgemmagladstone.com 🌐 Website: drgemmagladstone.com
📷 Instagram: @drgemmacoaching

🌻 Support the Podcast 🙏
Love the show? Help us keep going with a monthly contribution: Support here

Send Gemma a message

In this episode of Healing for Love, I respond to a thoughtful question from a listener who describes a relationship that is supportive and stable - yet something important is missing.

Her partner is kind, affectionate, and easy to live with. But when it comes to emotional conversations, he rarely initiates them. Over time, she has begun to feel emotionally alone in the relationship.

This is a surprisingly common dynamic.

Many people find themselves in relationships where their partner cares deeply but struggles with emotional expression or emotional dialogue. The question then becomes: is this simply a difference in style, or does it signal something deeper about compatibility and emotional needs?

In this episode, I explore how to think about this situation from both perspectives.

We discuss:

• Why emotional intimacy matters in long term relationships
• The difference between low emotional dialogue and true emotional neglect
• How early experiences can shape someone’s emotional style
• The role schemas can play in how we interpret our needs in relationships
• Why feeling like a “burden” when expressing needs is often an important clue
• How to distinguish between lack of skill and lack of motivation in a partner
• Questions you can ask yourself to clarify what you truly need in a relationship
• How to communicate emotional needs in a constructive and specific way

Sometimes the most important shift is moving away from the question:

“How do I change my partner?”

And instead asking:

“What kind of emotional life do I want to live in my relationship?”

If you’ve ever found yourself wondering whether your emotional needs are “too much,” this episode will give you a thoughtful framework for understanding what’s really going on.

Support the show

🩷 Love Wisely - DOORS OPEN NOW🎉🎉

🎁 Dating With Insight - FREE Guide

💛 Elevate You Worth: Self-Worth Healing Bundle

🚩 The Red Flag Project 🚩 Get Instant Access

Connect with Me

📩hello@drgemmagladstone.com 🌐 Website: drgemmagladstone.com
📷 Instagram: @drgemmacoaching

🌻 Support the Podcast 🙏
Love the show? Help us keep going with a monthly contribution: Support here