Grief and Sobriety

Episode 1: Grief & Sobriety — Losing My Mom and Finding Myself

In the debut episode of Before I Forget, Lil Xan opens up about the most painful chapter of his life — the sudden loss of his mother — and the fight to stay sober in the aftermath.

For the first time, Xan shares how her passing shattered him, what those first days and weeks really looked like, and how he navigated grief without falling back into addiction. From the memories that haunt him to the moments that gave him strength, this episode goes deeper than anything he’s ever put on the internet.

It’s raw, emotional, vulnerable, and real — a conversation about loss, healing, and the daily work it takes to rebuild your life one sober day at a time.

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