How can we maintain a compassionate heart in a world defined by conflict?

Sean Feit Oakes shows us how we can use the Brahma Viharas—the "immeasurable" states of love, compassion, joy, and equanimity— to provide an internal sanctuary from the "poisons" of greed and hatred.

He explains that the Buddha taught these practices as the essential foundation for wisdom, inviting us to radiate a boundless friendliness that offers an escape from suffering within our own hearts.

Using the story of the "wounded king" Ajata Satu, Sean illustrates how even those burdened by terrible past actions can find solace through ethical living and metta (friendliness). He suggests transforming our "inheritance of toxicity" by leading with warmth in all areas of life:

• Universal Friendliness: Bringing a "benevolent" heart to every mundane interaction.
• Compassion: Allowing the heart to "quiver" or shatter in response to suffering rather than turning away.
• The Difficult Person: Wishing ease even for those who cause harm, acknowledging their basic desire for happiness.
• Self-Kindness: Shifting one's internal dialogue to be tender and supportive—even calling oneself "sweetheart"—during difficult inner work.

By invoking this "boundless" friendliness, Sean argues that we can heal our own internal karma and ripple that change out into the community.

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Sean Feit Oakes, PhD (he/him, queer, Puerto Rican & English ancestry, living on unceded Pomo land in NorCal), teaches Buddhism and somatic practice focusing on the integration of meditation, trauma resolution, and social justice. He received teaching authorization from Jack Kornfield, and wrote his dissertation on extraordinary states in Buddhist meditation and experimental dance. He teaches at Spirit Rock Meditation Center, East Bay Meditation Center, Insight Timer, and locally. See SeanFeitOakes.com

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CREDITS
Audio Production: George Hubbard
Producer: Tom Bruein
Music/Logo/Artwork: Derek Lassiter

Daigan Gaither helps us examine how we can remain deeply engaged with a suffering world without losing our sanity, despite the "fire hose" of constant information and activism.

He explores the phrase "it's okay to not be okay" as a living practice rather than a mere platitude. Drawing on his experience as a Zen priest and long-time activist, Daigan explains that the Buddhist commitment to "not turning away" from suffering can sometimes lead to a state of being "overpowered" by the sheer volume of global crises. He argues that practitioners must learn to differentiate between the information they truly need and the noise that causes unnecessary overwhelm, while also paying close attention to "internal consumption"—the rigid thoughts, judgments, and expectations we impose upon ourselves.

Daigan emphasizes that being "okay" is not a static state achieved through knowledge or following rules, but a continuous process of returning to the present moment. He suggests that the heart of practice is the ability to sit still amidst whatever is happening and connect with the raw reality of one’s own body and mind, rather than the stories we tell about them. To cultivate this resilience, he highlights several key approaches:

• Mindful Consumption: Recognizing that thoughts, media, and opinions are forms of consumption that can create a cycle of anxiety if not monitored.
• The Pursuit of Joy: Actively seeking out "pockets of safety" and small moments of delight—such as videos of babies laughing or the support of a community—to avoid falling into hopelessness.
• Investigating the Body: Viewing mind and body as inseparable and investigating where emotions live physically (such as shallow breath or tightness) to transform abstract "big feelings" into manageable sensations.
• The Power of the "Return": Accepting that 90% of practice is simply the act of settling back into awareness whenever the mind wanders into "not being okay".

By viewing this internal struggle as a koan to be investigated, Daigan invites listeners to find a sense of liberation that doesn't require the world—or themselves—to be perfect.

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Rev. Daigan Gaither (he/him) began Buddhist practice in 1995 in the Vipassana (Insight) tradition, then began studying Zen in 2003. He received Lay Ordination in 2006 where he was given the name Daigan or “Great Vow,” and received Priest Ordination in July 2011.

Daigan speaks internationally on a variety of topics particularly around gender, sexuality, social justice, and their intersections with the Dharma. He also sits or has sat on a number of boards and committees that serve community needs and further social justice causes.

Daigan has a BA in Philosophy and Religion from San Francisco State University, and an MA in Buddhist Studies (with a chaplaincy certificate and a certificate in Soto Zen Buddhism) from the Graduate Theological Union and the Institute of Buddhist Studies. He lives in San Francisco, CA and identifies as a disabled, queer, white, cis male. Learn more at https://queerdharma.net

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To support our efforts to share these talks with LGBTQIA audiences worldwide, please visit https://gaybuddhist.org/
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CREDITS
Audio Production: George Hubbard
Producer: Tom Bruein
Music/Logo/Artwork: Derek Lassiter

How can we maintain a steady heart and a sense of purpose when the world around us is in conflict?

Victoria Austin introduces us to the concept of a "posture of peace," which she defines not merely as a physical sitting position but as an enduring internal state. Drawing on stories of individuals facing extreme challenges—from the early days of the HIV/AIDS crisis to recovery from traumatic accidents—Victoria suggests that while feelings of love may fluctuate, an internal posture of peace allows us to remain grounded in our "vulnerable humanity." This posture serves as a cornerstone for action in the world, enabling practitioners to meet their "inmost request" and fulfill their unique work without being overwhelmed by external circumstances.

To build this foundation, she provides a framework for understanding and transforming internal reactions, particularly those related to conflict and "unwholesome" impulses. She argues that peace is not passive but requires an active engagement with our emotions and the ethical consequences of our choices, such as avoiding the "three ways to be evil": acting directly, colluding, or condoning.

Victoria categorizes the messages behind our primary struggles and the paths to meaning as follows:

• Anger: Acts as a signal for unmet needs or violated boundaries; when safely held, its energy becomes a resource for change.
• Fear: A call for support and allies, often requiring the courage to ask for help.
• Sadness and Grief: States that require time and the nurturing care of others—symbolized by "soup"—to be fully processed.
• Three Ways to Live: she describes existence through the ultimate (the big picture), the relative (historical and familial connections), and the skillful (the ability to move between the two for meaning).

By recognizing that "all experiences come from the mind," she concludes that an internal posture of love is contagious, impacting everyone we meet and offering a stable way to manifest love in an unsettled world.

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Shōsan Victoria Austin started practicing Zen in 1971, and is a Dharma heir of Sōjun Mel Weitsman. To help increase the accessibility of Zen practice in the West, she became an Iyengar yoga teacher in 1988. She has served in many roles at San Francisco Zen Center’s urban temples and Tassajara Monastery, including President, Head Cook, and Tanto (Head of Practice). Victoria currently teaches meditation and yoga in diverse settings throughout California and serves as an International Teacher (Kokusaifukyōshi) of the Sōtō School.

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To support our efforts to share these talks with LGBTQIA audiences worldwide, please visit https://gaybuddhist.org/
There you can:

• Donate
• Learn how to participate live
• Find our schedule of upcoming speakers
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• Enjoy over 900 recorded talks dating back to 1995

CREDITS
Audio Production: George Hubbard
Producer: Tom Bruein
Music/Logo/Artwork: Derek Lassiter