In this powerful and heart-opening conversation, I sit down with Hilary Crowley — foster-to-adopt mom, holistic health practitioner, energy healer, TEDx speaker, and author of The Power of Energy Medicine. Hilary shares the extraordinary story of how she followed intuition, courage, and connection all the way to her son — and the unexpected lessons she learned along the way.

From discovering the importance of foster-care support groups before certification, to navigating shutdowns, attachment, sibling dynamics, and biological family relationships, Hilary offers deep insight into what it really means to love, advocate, and parent a child who has survived instability and trauma.

We also explore the intersection of intuition and fostering, how to recognize an intuitive “yes,” and why older-child adoption is a powerful — and often overlooked — pathway to building a family.

This episode is full of wisdom, warmth, and practical guidance for anyone considering fostering or adoption, anyone parenting a child with trauma, or anyone wanting to better understand the emotional landscape of the foster-to-adopt journey.

✨ The Power of Support Groups:

Why attending a foster-care support group before certification can completely shift your journey.

How Hilary built trust with resource workers just by showing up.

✨ The Foster-to-Adopt Origin Story

Hilary’s longing for a second child and the friend who unexpectedly opened the door to fostering.

Her first experiences learning the “lingo” and navigating parenting classes.

✨ A Moment of Raw Honesty in Training

Hilary’s emotional fear response during training — and the life-changing validation she received from a social worker.

✨ Navigating the Needs of Two Children

• How fostering disrupted her biological son’s world — and how it ultimately expanded his compassion and resilience.

✨ Understanding Shutdowns / Rock Brain

• What shutdowns looked like in real life, what triggered them, and the remarkable strategy Hilary used to help her son feel safe and reconnected.

Why “parent as if this may never change” became essential guidance.

✨ Biological Family Relationships

• Navigating shifting dynamics and relationships at home.
• How her sons are now building connections as a young adults.

✨ Intuition, Energy, and Adoption

• How Hilary’s work as an energy healer informed her parenting and decision-making.
• What an intuitive “yes” really feels like — and how to differentiate intuition from fear.
• Why fostering aligns deeply with the true meaning of the word foster: to encourage, nourish, and support.

✨ A Powerful Message for Prospective Foster Parents

• Why older-child adoption (6–10+) is filled with beauty, growth, and meaning — and why these children deserve more visibility and love.

• Showing up and becoming known in your foster community can change everything.
• Children with trauma need connection and safety more than perfection.
• Saying no to a placement can be an act of love and alignment.
• Intuition is a real, accessible tool for navigating uncertainty.
• Adoption is deeply transformative for the entire family.

Life's a wild ride, isn't it? Kind of like fostering and adopting, which is the heart and soul of our podcast, From Foster to Forever. We dive into the ups and downs of non-traditional families, sharing heartfelt stories that are anything but ordinary. In this latest episode, I pop in to give a shout-out after a little break from the mic. I know, I know, it’s been a minute, but hey, life (and surgery!) happens. Whether you’re a new listener or a seasoned vet, I’m stoked to have you here with me.

I also take a moment to thank all you lovely folks who’ve been tuning in and leaving those golden five-star reviews. Seriously, they help get our stories out there for others who might need a little hope or support. Plus, I’m super excited to announce that I’ve joined the ranks of columnists at Fostering Families Today, a sweet publication all about foster care. My first piece drops online soon, where I discuss how my CrossFit journey helped me tackle the tough times during fostering. It’s all about that mental toughness, and trust me, it’s a game changer. So, stay tuned, because I’m gearing up for season three and I want to hear from you! Got a story to share or know someone who does? Hit me up. Let’s keep this conversation rolling and make some magic happen!

Takeaways:

• This episode welcomes newcomers and reminds longtime listeners about the journey so far.
• Rachel expresses gratitude for every review, emphasizing their importance in spreading awareness.
• The podcast announces a new column by Rachel in Fostering Families Today Magazine, a must-read for foster care enthusiasts.
• Rachel discusses her first article, which ties her personal story of fostering-to-adopt, with her passion for CrossFit and mental toughness.
• Listeners are encouraged to share their own foster to adopt stories for potential podcast features.
• The episode wraps up with Rachel's summer wishes for health, safety, and joy for all listeners.

Dennis DJ Quinn joins Rachel to share some seriously heartwarming wisdom from his years of mentoring through the Big Brother program. Right off the bat, he dives into the real deal about what it’s like to step into a kid’s life—not as a dad replacement, but as a big brother and a friend. He’s here to remind us that fostering connections can change not just a child’s life, but your own too. Dennis spills the beans on his journey, filled with laughter, challenges, and some unexpected life lessons that hit harder than a speeding train. So, if you're curious about how you can make a difference—whether it’s through fostering, mentoring, or just being there for someone in need—this chat is packed with all the feels and practical tips to get you started.

Dennis DJ Quinn joins Rachel for a heartfelt journey into the world of mentorship and advocacy for youth. His experiences as a Big Brother have shaped not only the lives of the children he has mentored but also his own. Initially stepping into the role with the desire to 'fix' the kids, Dennis quickly learned that his purpose was to be a friend and a supportive figure rather than a parental replacement. Throughout the discussion, he reflects on the profound bond he formed with his first Little Brother, who remained an important part of his life for over four decades. Dennis shares the ups and downs of his mentorship adventures, including the unique challenges faced by kids in the foster system and the emotional weight of navigating their lives amidst uncertainty. He emphasizes the power of consistency and patience in building trust with these children, illustrating how simple activities, like ordering food at a restaurant, can be monumental steps towards personal growth for them.

The conversation also touches on the practicalities of becoming a Big Brother, including the application process, background checks, and the importance of finding the right match between mentor and mentee. Dennis highlights the increasing demand for volunteers in mentorship programs and encourages listeners to consider how they can contribute, even if they feel hesitant about making a long-term commitment. The episode wraps up with some light-hearted anecdotes and reinforces the message that helping others can be as rewarding for the mentor as it is for the mentee, creating lasting memories and lessons along the way.

Takeaways:

• Dennis shared that becoming a Big Brother is less about fixing kids' lives and more about being a supportive friend and mentor.
• The journey of mentorship can be a two-way street where both the mentor and the child learn valuable life lessons from each other.
• It's crucial to understand that you don't replace a child's parent, but you can be a positive influence in their life.
• Volunteering as a Big Brother or in similar programs can offer a fulfilling experience that enriches both the volunteer and the child in need.

Links:

Dennis' Website

Stick Figures (Dennis' book about being a Big Brother)

Big Brothers/Sisters Website

In continuation of our celebration of Autistic voices, we're diving deep into the world of dance and neurodiversity with Amanda Trisdale and Leta Rundell, the dynamic duo behind the Autistic Wings Dance Company. Right off the bat, they tackle how traditional dance environments often fall short for autistic kids, leaving them feeling sidelined and misunderstood. Amanda shares her personal journey, revealing how her own experiences with autism shaped the way they run their dance studio—where inclusivity is not just a buzzword, but the very foundation. With a maximum of four students per class, they’re flipping the script on what dance can be, ensuring each child gets the personalized attention they deserve. So, whether you're a dance enthusiast or just curious about fostering an inclusive space, this episode is packed with insights, stories, and a sprinkle of inspiration that you won't want to miss!

As I chat with Amanda Trisdale and Leta Rundell, the founders of Autistic Wings Dance Company, I’m struck by the sheer determination that went into making their dream a reality. Their journey began with the simple act of dance—specifically, tap dancing—when Amanda's daughter Leta found her groove. Initially, it was a joyous discovery, but soon Amanda faced the harsh reality of a dance world that often overlooks the needs of autistic children. With teachers who didn’t quite understand Leta's behaviors and struggles, it became clear that the traditional studios weren’t cutting it. This led to a pivotal moment that drove them to create an entirely new space dedicated to nurturing autistic talent.

In our conversation, we delve into the philosophy behind Autistic Wings. The focus here is not just on dance, but on creating a community where autistic dancers can express themselves freely. By limiting class sizes to four students, they ensure that every child receives the attention and support they need to flourish. It’s fascinating how Amanda explains that many existing dance classes, even those labeled as “autistic,” often fail to accommodate the full spectrum of needs within the community. Their approach is refreshingly unique, rooted in understanding and compassion, which is the backbone of their teaching methods. We share a few laughs as they recount some of the more humorous challenges of teaching dance to kids who might interpret rules a little differently—like turning a dance move into a personal expression of joy!

Wrapping up, we discuss the future goals of the company, which include expanding their reach and encouraging other dance studios to adopt similar inclusive practices. The conversation leaves listeners feeling inspired and motivated to support such necessary changes in the arts community. I walk away with a heart full of hope, knowing that with leaders like Amanda and Leta, the dance world is slowly becoming a place where every child can find their rhythm and shine.

Takeaways:

• Creating a dance studio specifically for autistic kids allows for a tailored approach that traditional studios often overlook, making dance accessible and enjoyable.
• The journey of building Autistic Wings Dance Company highlights the importance of understanding neurodiversity through a community-driven lens, rather than a 'one-size-fits-all' method.
• Having classes with a maximum of four students ensures that each child receives individualized attention, promoting a supportive environment that nurtures their unique talents.
• The founders' determination to create a safe space for autistic dancers stems from personal experiences, demonstrating how advocacy can transform lives and foster community.
• It's vital to eliminate misconceptions about autism in dance education; understanding that each autistic individual has different needs can create a more inclusive atmosphere.
• The response from the community has been overwhelmingly positive, proving that...

Today’s chat dives deep into the nitty-gritty of parenting while navigating the complexities of autism and ADHD. Our guest, Christopher Wyatt, shares his personal journey of becoming a foster parent, which took a serious turn when his wife was diagnosed with cancer shortly after they welcomed their daughters into their lives. Instead of throwing in the towel, he emphasizes the importance of commitment, stating, “We signed up to be the best parents we could be, whether it was for a year or for a lifetime.” We get real about the emotional toll of foster care, the challenges of navigating medical decisions, and the struggle to advocate for kids who often come with a suitcase full of trauma. It's a heartfelt conversation about how neurodiversity can actually bring unique strengths to parenting, proving that love and support can thrive even amidst chaos.

Takeaways:

• Navigating the foster care system is not just paperwork; it's an emotional rollercoaster that demands a solid support network.
• Autism and ADHD can actually complement parenting styles, especially in structured environments where routines are key.
• The impact of trauma on children in foster care is profound, often leading to complex emotional and developmental challenges.
• Awareness of autism has dramatically increased, yet many still underestimate the importance of tailored support for children with special needs.

Sharon Dunleavy joins Rachel in this enlightening episode to shed some serious light on the critical role of educational advocacy for kids in foster care. With around 20,000 youth aging out of the system each year, Sharon dives deep into the staggering statistics that reveal a troubling reality—many of these kids face challenges like homelessness and incarceration. We chat about the importance of understanding trauma and how it affects learning, plus the laws that can help foster kids get the educational support they need. Sharon’s insights not only highlight the dire need for advocacy but also serve up some practical advice for foster parents navigating the educational landscape. So, whether you’re a seasoned foster parent or just curious about the system, you won’t want to miss this conversation packed with valuable info and a few laughs along the way!

Sharon Dunleavy, a passionate advocate for foster care education, brings her wealth of experience to the conversation, diving deep into the often-overlooked needs of children in foster care. With a background in special education and over two decades in ministry, Sharon's journey into foster care advocacy stemmed from a desire to serve vulnerable kids. She shares how she transitioned to training foster parents on educational advocacy, emphasizing the critical role that education plays in the lives of foster children. The statistics she presents are staggering: 20,000 youth age out of foster care annually, yet 25% fail to graduate high school. These numbers highlight the urgent need for informed advocates like Sharon, who work tirelessly to ensure that every child in the foster system receives the educational support they deserve. The conversation touches on systemic issues within the foster care system and the importance of trauma-informed practices in schools, shedding light on how teachers can better understand and support their students. Sharon's insights serve as a wake-up call for all of us to step up and be advocates for these children, whose futures depend on the support and resources we provide today.

Takeaways:

• Foster kids need strong advocates; their voices often get lost in the shuffle.
• Educational rights for foster kids can be confusing, so it's crucial for foster parents to understand them.
• Trauma significantly affects the brain's development; early intervention can help improve outcomes for foster kids.
• Discipline is about teaching, not punishment; it's essential to focus on the positives in behavior management.
• Many foster kids face mental health challenges; being trauma-informed is key to supporting their needs.
• Statistics reveal that a large percentage of youth aging out of foster care face dire challenges; awareness is the first step to change.

Companies mentioned in this episode:

• sharondunlevy.com
• Every Student Succeeds Act
• Individuals with Disabilities Act
• Family First Prevention Services Act
• Annie Casey Foundation
• Aquarius Rising
• Split Rock Studios
• Joe Fulginiti

Terria Roushun joins me today to dive into the heart of hair care and its cultural significance, especially for transracial adoptive parents of Black children. She emphasizes that caring for a child's hair is not just about styling—it's about recognizing and affirming their identity and heritage. Terria, a licensed cosmetologist and trauma-informed care expert, shares her journey from a corporate career to empowering families with the knowledge and tools they need to navigate cultural nuances in hair care. We chat about the importance of understanding the history behind Black hair and how it intertwines with self-esteem and pride. Plus, Terria offers practical advice for parents feeling overwhelmed by the challenges of caring for their child's hair, reminding us all that it's totally okay to learn and grow together in this journey.

Terria Roushun, the founder of Hair Essentials and a certified trauma-informed care expert, joins Rachel for a rich discussion that goes beyond hair care – it’s about understanding identity, culture, and love. As we kick things off, Terria passionately explains how learning about the cultural significance of hair is a vital part of parenting black children. She emphasizes that it’s not just about keeping hair neat and styled; it’s about making a profound statement to your child: “I see you, I value you.” With humor and insight, Rachel and Terria dissect the common fears and anxieties that adoptive parents face when caring for a black child’s hair. It’s like diving into a treasure chest of wisdom, where you realize that every coil and curl carries a story and a history.

Throughout the conversation, they tackle the misconceptions surrounding black hair, dispelling the idea that it’s a daunting task that requires some magical product. Instead, Terria encourages parents to view hair care as an opportunity for connection – a bonding time that can lead to deeper discussions about identity and self-worth. With relatable stories and practical tips, Terria inspires parents to embrace this journey with love and confidence, reminding them that learning how to care for their child’s hair is not a chore but a beautiful act of love.

The episode is not just educational; it’s also heartwarming and empowering. It serves as a reminder that the journey of transracial adoption is filled with both challenges and immense joy. Listeners will leave feeling motivated to not only take care of hair but to also celebrate the unique identities of their children. If you’re looking to enrich your understanding of hair care in the context of cultural identity, this episode is your golden ticket!

Takeaways:

• Understanding the cultural significance of hair in black children fosters self-esteem and identity.
• Hair care for black children is deeply intertwined with history and personal pride, beyond mere maintenance.
• Transracial adoptive parents must actively engage in learning about hair care to empower their children.
• Creating a positive hair care routine can transform it into a bonding experience between parent and child.
• Parents often underestimate the emotional weight of hair care for their black children, leading to anxiety.
• Terria emphasizes that learning about black hair is a continuous journey, not just a one-time task.

LINKS:

Terria's website

Terria's Facebook Group

Rachel Fulginiti sits down with Dr. John DeGarmo, a powerhouse in the world of foster care and adoption, to dig into the importance of providing every child with a forever family. Dr. DeGarmo shares his heartfelt journey into fostering, sparked by personal loss and a desire to help kids who have faced unimaginable challenges. With over 60 children welcomed into his home, he’s not just talking the talk; he’s living it. We dive into the nitty-gritty of what it means to foster, the misconceptions that often cloud the process, and the critical need for compassionate support within the foster care system. Trust me, this episode is packed with insight, inspiration, and a few laughs along the way!

Dr. John DeGarmo, a passionate advocate for foster care, shares his deeply personal journey in the world of fostering and adoption. As he opens up about his initial reluctance to become a foster parent, he recounts the tragic loss of his first child and how this experience ignited a desire within him and his wife to help other children in need. With a heartwarming candor, John elaborates on how his family has fostered over 60 children and adopted three, emphasizing the profound impact this journey has had on his biological children, instilling in them a spirit of compassion and service to others.

The discussion also dives into the challenges faced by foster parents, particularly in light of the mental health crisis exacerbated by the pandemic and the alarming rise in human trafficking cases linked to vulnerable children in foster care. John highlights the urgent need for more foster families and the critical role that support services play in the lives of both foster parents and the children they care for. He candidly shares anecdotes that illustrate the chaos and joy of raising a large family, including humorous moments that arise from the unique experiences of fostering.

In a heartfelt conclusion, John reminds listeners that while they may not be able to change the world, they have the power to change the world for a child in their home. His story is a powerful testament to love, resilience, and the transformative power of family, encouraging everyone to consider how they might help children in crisis, even if foster parenting isn’t an option for them.

Takeaways:

• Dr. John DeGarmo emphasizes that every child deserves a loving, forever family, which is a fundamental belief driving his work in foster care and adoption.
• The podcast highlights the significant challenges in foster parenting, including grief and loss when children are reunified or leave the home for any reason.
• Foster parents must be well-prepared and supported, as the experiences can vary drastically with each child's unique background and needs.
• Dr. DeGarmo shares personal anecdotes illustrating the joys and challenges of fostering, including humorous moments that come with raising kids in a chaotic environment.
• The need for foster families has grown, especially post-pandemic, with rising mental health issues and a lack of resources for both children and foster parents.
• Awareness and advocacy are crucial; even if one can't foster, there are many ways to support children in crisis within the community.

Links referenced in this episode:

• fromfoster2forever.com
• foster2foreverpodcast (Instagram)
• The FosterCare Institute (Dr. John's organization)