Ever fallen for someone who looked flawless on paper, but in real life turned out to be your personal nightmare with a Christian smile slapped on top?

In today’s episode, I sit down with Maile, a bright spark in our Flying Free community, who thought she’d landed in God’s will when she married her second husband. Instead, she found herself suffocating under spiritual gaslighting, emotional sabotage, and escalating violence, all hidden behind the shiny veneer of “good Christian marriage.”

This is a real story of what it looks like to wake up, break free, and rebuild your life, even when you’ve already done the divorce thing once before, and the church ladies are clutching their pearls at you for round two.

In this episode:

• The red flags Maile ignored during dating (love bombing, control, snooping)
• How spiritual abuse kept her stuck under the “good Christian wife” lie
• Why COVID became the unexpected wake-up call she needed
• How she found the courage to leave, even after already being divorced once
• What freedom and faith look like on the other side of abuse

Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here

Related Resources:

• Book mentioned: The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk.
• Some other survivor stories: Shelley’s story and Stacie’s story.

Have you ever crawled your way out of an emotionally abusive relationship, finally free, only to be met with cold shoulders, Christian cliques, and confused stares from the very people who should’ve been first in line at your welcome-back party?

Or maybe you’ve thought about getting out, but your instincts all tell you that you’ll lose everyone you love in the process?

In this episode, I answer two listener-submitted questions that go straight to the heart of what so many Christian women wrestle with post-abuse: rejection from family, exclusion in church, and the confusion that comes with trying to be a decent human in the aftermath of emotional trauma.

We talk:

• The underbelly of emotional immaturity
• Spiritual bypassing in religious circles
• What “grace” actually looks like (hint: it’s not begging for scraps)
• And why your healing is not up for debate

This one’s for every woman who’s been ghosted by her family or made to feel like a spiritual pariah in the church lobby.

Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here

Related Resources:

• Get a free chapter of my book, “Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage” and companion workbook when you hop on my mailing list.
• Listen to some related Flying Free Podcast episodes, including “Why Being Rejected by Your Church and Family Hurts So Bad” and “When You’ve Been Hurt by Church.”

So you’re getting out of your emotionally and spiritually abusive marriage (congratulations, by the way, you’re a hero), and you think the hard part is over? Honey, buckle up. This episode pulls back the curtain on what actually goes down in family court and why women like you and me need to step into the CEO role of our divorce process.

I talk with Amy Polacko, a woman who’s been through it, wrote a book about it, and now helps other women survive it. We cover everything from strategic silence and choosing the right attorney, to the "he’s such a good guy" nonsense that courts just eat up.

Here’s the low-down: You could be framed. Literally. Not metaphorically. Actually framed. So let’s talk about how to not let that happen.

Key Takeaways:

• You must be the CEO of your divorce. Do not—I repeat, do NOT—hand the wheel to someone else and hope for the best.
• The justice system isn’t always just. Especially if you're a woman who dares to leave an abuser.
• Document everything and hire smart. Get a coach before you get an attorney. Better yet, get Amy.
• Abusers have a playbook. And Amy knows what’s on every page.
• Your “Christian” husband might still screw you over. Faith language doesn’t mean he’s safe. It might just mean he’s scarier.
• Kids grow up. Even if you lose custody, there’s hope. Connection isn't court-mandated, it’s soul-deep. We’ll talk about what to do if the unthinkable happens.

Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here

Related Resources:

• Check out Amy’s website and get some one-on-one coaching with her.
• Get Amy’s FREE resource, 10 Divorce Mistakes You Can’t Afford to Make.
• Get the Proactive Playbook for Divorce or take her course, Divorce Decoded.
• Read her co-authored book, Framed: Women in the Family Court Underworld.
• Connect with Amy on Instagram.
• Go listen to some related Flying Free Podcast episodes, including “Winning Child Custody & Divorce Battles” and “How to Be the Parent Your Child Needs During Divorce.”
• And of course, consider joining the Flying Free Kaleidoscope where we make education and support for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages (or making their exit) affordable and life-changing. (Plus Amy is one of our resident coaches!)

Amy is a divorce coach and an award-winning journalist who is a domestic abuse survivor. Through her Freedom Warrior coaching business, she has guided hundreds of women out of toxic relationships and empowers women to be the CEO of their divorce. She is a former full-time investigative reporter on television. Amy’s work has been featured in HuffPost, The Washington Post, Newsweek, NBC News, The Independent, New York Observer and Ms. She co-authored the groundbreaking book FRAMED: Women in the Family Court Underworld with Dr. Christine Cocchiola which exposes the gender bias crisis in our justice system