As we head into a new year, Chris and Melissa wanted to revisit a conversation that has quietly shaped their family more than almost anything else: the power of language.

This idea — that language creates — was one of the very first topics ever discussed on The Family Brand Podcast, and it's still one of the most talked-about episodes to this day. Because once you see it, you can't unsee it.

In this episode, Chris explains why language is never neutral. The words we use are either rooted in possibility or anchored in limitation — and over time, they shape our beliefs, our behaviors, our marriages, our kids, and even what we believe is possible for our lives.

Melissa shares real-life moments where she's seen language create identity — including a powerful story about how a single sentence labeled one of their children as "shy," and how quickly that label became part of his self-story. Together, they unpack how easily we talk ourselves out of what we want by using phrases like "I should," "I need to," or "that could never work."

They also explore how we often spend far more energy talking about what we don't want, don't like, don't have, or what isn't working — and how simply shifting our language can begin to change how life occurs for us. From an Uber conversation about health, to a heartbreaking post about a mother who hadn't seen her daughter in 14 years, this episode brings the concept of language into everyday life.

This isn't about toxic positivity or pretending things are perfect. It's about awareness. It's about noticing the words you use — with yourself, with your spouse, and with your kids — and asking whether they're creating freedom or reinforcing fear.

As Chris says, "If you upgrade your language, you upgrade your life."
And as a family, that's a powerful place to start.

LINKS:

All Links Family Brand!

• stan.store/familybrand
• familybrand.com/quiz
• familybrand.com/retreats.
  

Episode Minute By Minute:

• 00:00 – Holiday season, basketball season, and family life right now
• 01:45 – Why this conversation matters heading into a new year
• 02:30 – Revisiting one of the most impactful Family Brand episodes ever
• 03:10 – "Language creates" — what that actually means
• 04:10 – Words create either possibility or limitation
• 05:10 – How language shapes the culture of your home
• 06:00 – The Uber story: "I should go to the gym"
• 07:40 – Anchored in limitation vs. rooted in possibility
• 08:40 – Why guilt and shame don't create change
• 10:10 – The four language traps: don't want, don't have, don't like, isn't working
• 11:30 – Shifting energy toward what does work
• 13:10 – A heartbreaking story about language and impossibility
• 15:00 – Declaring what you want — then ripping the seed out
• 16:30 – Why staying limited feels safer than change
• 18:20 – Language creates identity (the "shy" story)
• 20:00 – How parents unintentionally label their kids
• 21:45 – Upgrading language without guilt or pressure
• 23:10 – Social media, negativity, and reinforcing limitation
• 24:30 – A simple experiment: change your language for one week
• 25:45 – Helping your kids shift language without correcting them
• 26:45 – Final takeaway: talk about what works
• 27:20 – Family Brand Quiz + free PDF invitation

Chief Reminding Officer: The Power of Repetition in Your Family

If you've ever felt like a broken record as a parent — constantly reminding your kids (or yourself) of the same things over and over — this episode will make you feel a whole lot better.

This week, Chris and Melissa talk about something they've been feeling in both their home and business lately: that quiet drift that happens when you stop doing the simple things that actually work. The routines that keep your house running. The systems that make your marriage stronger. The habits that help your family thrive.

And the truth they came back to?
Most families don't need a brand-new plan… they just need to remember the one they already have.

Chris shares a conversation that pushed him to revisit Excellence Wins by Horst Schulze, the cofounder of the Ritz-Carlton. One line jumped off the page:

"Great leaders are really just Chief Reminding Officers."

At the Ritz, they review the same guiding principles every 21 days — not because people don't know them, but because repetition is what keeps a culture alive.

As Chris and Melissa talk through examples from their own home, you'll hear how easy it is to slip into "sloppy" seasons — dishes piling up, routines disappearing, date nights pushed aside. Not because something is wrong… but because we forget what works.

Melissa shares why repetition used to feel boring to her — and how she learned to see it as one of the most loving, grounding things you can do for your family. When you remind your kids who they are, remind your spouse what your marriage is about, or remind yourself what your family values… you're strengthening your culture every single time.

This episode will make you feel encouraged, not overwhelmed. You'll walk away remembering that you don't need to reinvent your life — you probably already have the tools, rhythms, and values that work. You just need to return to them, repeat them, and keep reminding the people you love most.

LINKS:

All Links Family Brand!

• stan.store/familybrand
• familybrand.com/quiz
• familybrand.com/retreats.
  

Episode Minute By Minute:

• 00:00 – Recap: Family Brand Blitz and 20th anniversary reflections
• 01:30 – Introducing today's topic: becoming the Chief Reminding Officer
• 02:00 – Why repetition and reinforcement are underrated leadership traits
• 03:00 – The "authentic conversation" that sparked this episode
• 04:00 – Lessons from Excellence Wins and the Ritz Carlton's 21 rules
• 05:30 – "Ladies and gentlemen serving ladies and gentlemen" — defining culture
• 06:30 – Why repetition sustains identity better than constant reinvention
• 08:00 – Applying business lessons to family life
• 09:00 – How Family Brand uses corporate exercises to shape home culture
• 10:00 – Responding to the "we need something new" mindset
• 11:30 – The real fix for "sloppiness" in teams and families
• 12:30 – Why date nights and routines matter more than new ideas
• 13:30 – How small sacrifices lead to peace and structure
• 14:30 – The "Family Works When…" and "Marriage Works When…" exercise
• 15:30 – Writing down what makes your family thrive
• 16:30 – Reinforcing vs. reinventing: the real job of leadership
• 17:00 – Melissa's insight: learning to love the act of reminding
• 18:00 – Final takeaway: stop fighting repetition — embrace it as the path to peace

Have you ever caught yourself saying "no" to your kids' adventures out of pure instinct — only to wonder later if maybe the risk was worth it? In this episode, Chris and Melissa talk about how they're learning to raise kids who are more confident, capable, and adventurous by saying yes a little more often.

The idea started after Melissa read The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt — a powerful book that explores how modern parenting and constant digital connection have created more anxious, less independent kids. Together, they reflect on how the shift from outdoor play to screens has changed childhood, and what parents can do to reclaim freedom and resilience for their kids.

They share personal stories from their own family — like letting their teenage son navigate New York City solo, their kids exploring Paris and Croatia by themselves, and their 10-year-old's first bike ride to school (which included a coyote sighting and a dog chase). Each story carries the same theme: that a little bit of risk, independence, and real-world adventure is not just okay — it's essential.

Chris and Melissa also discuss how media consumption has shaped our fears, why the world may not actually be more dangerous than it used to be, and how giving kids appropriate autonomy builds courage and confidence. They tackle the smartphone dilemma too — why they're rethinking when their kids get phones, and what it means to trade "connection" for constant anxiety.

This episode will inspire you to loosen the reins just a bit, trust your kids more, and rediscover the joy of letting them learn through life — not just lectures. As Chris puts it, "Adventure builds confidence. Confidence builds courage. And courage builds character."

LINKS:

All Links Family Brand!

• stan.store/familybrand
• familybrand.com/quiz
• familybrand.com/retreats.

Links For This Episode:

• https://www.anxiousgeneration.com

Episode Minute By Minute:

• 00:00 – The inspiration behind today's topic: The Anxious Generation
• 01:00 – Introducing the Family Brand Croatia Cruise (June 20–27!)
• 03:00 – Letting their 17-year-old explore New York City alone
• 05:00 – How independence builds confidence and perspective
• 06:00 – Kids navigating Paris, Croatia, and new cities on their own
• 08:00 – The 10-year-old's first solo bike ride (and wild encounters)
• 10:00 – How small risks create big growth and resilience
• 11:00 – Is the world really more dangerous than it used to be?
• 12:00 – The role media plays in fueling parental anxiety
• 13:00 – What The Anxious Generation teaches about freedom vs. fear
• 15:00 – Revisiting your family's smartphone rules
• 16:00 – Chris's powerful analogy: "Would you pay for your child's destruction?"
• 17:00 – The Harvard study on boredom and why it's good for kids
• 18:00 – Rediscovering stillness and creative thought
• 19:00 – Building community around shared parenting values
• 20:00 – Changing the narrative: why "different" is good
• 21:00 – Rewriting your family's agreements — it's never too late
• 22:00 – Holiday reflections: gifts that inspire adventure, not anxiety