By the time you see this episode, I’ll be in Tanzania, petting lions and riding zebras.

(Ok, I KNOW, that’s not likely to happen, but I wish it could!)

This week marks a lot of milestones.

It’s the one-year anniversary of my father’s passing, and part of my reason for visiting Tanzania is to honor his memory and express gratitude for making sure he left behind the funding I’d need for the trip.

It’s also the 200th episode of Fine is a 4-Letter Word – and as I was doing my last-minute packing and thinking about what I’d share, what immediately came to mind are the many valuable friendships and connections I’ve made through interviewing our amazing guests, working with our production team, and having the chance to dialogue with you – the listener – about what we share here.

Thus the topic of this very short (just 12 minutes and 50 seconds) episode, which is all about valuing yourself equally in friendships.

I’ve been around long enough to see friendships come and go – and stay – and am convinced of the validity of the saying “Some are for a season, some are for a lesson, and some are for life.”

In today’s episode, YOU are the subject.

When you tune in now, you’ll discover a simple but powerful blueprint that helps you determine which of your friendships serve you equally with the other person, which don’t, what you may be able to do to correct it, and what happens if you can’t.

At the very end, I have two very short “asks” of you – one is about the podcast, and one is about the status of your friendships.

I only ask if you could please give each one of them their due – it will take but a couple minutes – because the benefits you gain may astound you.

Lori’s hype song as she records this special episode is “Raise Your Glass” by Pink.

Resources:

• My Website: https://ZenRabbit.com/
• LinkedIn: https://zenrabbit.com/linkedin/
• Facebook: https://zenrabbit.com/facebook/
• Instagram: https://zenrabbit.com/instagram/
• Visit the “FINE is a 4-Letter Word” store at https://zenrabbit.printful.me

Invitation from Lori:

This episode is sponsored by Zen Rabbit.

Smart business leaders know trust is the foundation of every great workplace. And in today’s hybrid and fast-moving work culture, trust isn’t built in quarterly town halls or the occasional Slack message. It’s built through consistent, clear, and HUMAN communication.

Companies and leaders TALK about the importance of connection and community. And it’s easy to believe your organization is doing a great job of maintaining an awesome corporate culture. Because you’ve got annual all-hands and open door policies, and “fun" team-building events.

But let's be real. Leaders who are serious about building real trust are finding better ways to strengthen culture, create connection, and foster community.

That's where I come in. Forward thinking companies are hiring me to produce internal/private podcasts. To bring leadership and employees together through authentic stories, real conversations, and meaningful connections. Think of it as your old-school printed company newsletter - reinvented for the modern workforce. I KNOW, what a cool idea, right?!

If you run, work for, or know of a company that wants to upgrade...

If you’re having difficulty finding what you’re looking for in life, have you thought about looking in a completely different place? One that might require walking away from what you have?

Of course you can say that’s a lot easier said than done, especially if it feels like there’s not a whole lot out there for you.

For Shaun Murphy, known internationally as Mister Motivation, the idea of staying in place, settling, and subsisting never really worked for him. Fine is a 4-Letter Word, and at every step of the way, standing still has never been “fine” for him.

His father was murdered when he was six years old. His mother, an immigrant from Barbados, was poverty-stricken yet resourceful and would go through walls to make sure the family had enough – not much, for sure, but enough – with about $100 per month to spare. And yet, if she was down to her last $20 and met a starving stranger on the street, she’d buy them a good meal. So showing up, working hard without complaining, staying grounded in service, and helping other people – these were the core values the experience imprinted on Shaun.

After high school, he briefly went to college then dropped out to serve in the military for eight years. But when he got out, he discovered three unpleasant truths.

One, there is not nearly enough support for military servicepeople transitioning to civilian life. Two, after eight years of active duty and living well, all of a sudden he was back to not knowing for sure where his next meal would come from. And third, he found that as a man in his community, a man just couldn’t talk about it when things aren’t fine. Even if his buddies gave him an understanding ear in the moment, they might embarrass him over it a few weeks down the road. And women would see him as soft.

Shaun’s next job was working in the mailroom at NYU, where he learned a priceless lesson I’ll let him tell you about. Next it was off to Iraq, working as a combat civilian working the postal mission. And then he was introduced to Teach for America and realized this was his calling. By now, he had a good-paying steady job and career prospects. “Impact over income”, Shaun tells us – so he got the degree he needed and took a huge pay cut for the opportunity to spread wealth into the lives of others.

Fast-forward a bit, and Shaun found himself a former college dropout who had become a college professor teaching college students how to succeed in college.

There’s so much more to this story, as I’m going to let Shaun tell you in his own words. Now, he’s an accomplished motivational speaker, musician, author – and sports team owner. I can’t wait to share.

Shaun’s hype song is "The Bunker" by Mister Motivation.

Resources:

• Shaun Murphy’s website: https://mister-motivation.com/
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mrmurphy1/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/misterm0tivati0n
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/misterm0tivati0n/
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@mistermotivation492
• Claim your copy of Shaun Murphy's book, Unbreakable Valor: Triumph Through the Soul of...

A lot of companies use positive-sounding cliches like “people over profit” and “work-life balance”. This sounds good, until somebody pulls the sales reports and says “we need more revenue and profits”. Then, the bottom line becomes the bottom line. This is sometimes served with a side of “you come to work to do work, change the world on your own time”.

Now, picture a model where putting people over profit actually increases profits. Where work-life balance is not measured using number of hours worked or percentage of time in the office vs. working remotely. Being involved with a company that breaks the rules and norms for its industry, where coming to work to do work means doing your part to change the world.

Christian Agulles has created all of these things in an industry known for squeezing its engineers like getting that last drop out of the toothpaste tube.

Born and raised in College Point, a little town in Queens, Christian was a devout Catholic who went to church, went to Catholic school, and had the whole Catholic experience that, as he describes it, formed him and scarred him at the same time. His father, a police officer, was shot in the line of duty when Christian was seven. Even being able to retire on three-quarters pension, that money didn’t go far supporting a family including Christian and his two younger brothers. His mother went to work in the school cafeteria so she could align her schedule with her sons, and cleaned houses on weekends. By example, she taught Christian to not be afraid to do hard things and to do them with grace.

While starting his family, Christian spent the first 20 years of his career with an engineering firm that moved him around the country to open new offices. But over those 20 years, his employer was repeatedly acquired and evolved into company that focused more on acquisition, revenue, and EBIDA. It was right around this time he was recruited to join PAE. Everything worked out fine, yes? Well, Fine is a 4-Letter Word.

Did his moment of realization come from a coaching session at PAE with Sandy Lindstrom, known for the “polishing the diamond” principle, where he found out they did not feel he was very good at delivering feedback?

Was it discovering that his foundational values around doing hard work with grace could be merged with volunteerism, altruism, and contribution?

In a moment, when I bring Christian on, he’s going to guide us through his experience leading a Certified B-Corporation and how he’s taken one of their metrics – utilization – and redefined it to build PAE into a company that has a net positive impact not only on its employees, but on society as a whole. If, up until now, you’ve seen your best-laid plans get trumped by “the bottom line” when bills are due, this could be what you need to hear.

Christian’s hype songs are "Bring It On Home To Me" by Sam Cooke and "Right to Be Wrong" by Joss Stone.

Resources:

• Christian Agulles’ website: https://www.pae-engineers.com/
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christian-j-agulles/

Invitation from Lori:

This episode is sponsored by Zen Rabbit.

Smart business leaders know trust is the foundation of every great workplace. And in today’s hybrid and fast-moving work culture, trust isn’t built in quarterly town halls or the occasional Slack message. It’s built through consistent, clear, and HUMAN communication.

Companies and leaders TALK about the importance of...