Episode 131 - So You Had A Religious Sex Dream

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Moroni opens the episode with The Flood Line, a blackberry Crown Royal and ginger ale cocktail that hits hard, pops loud, and sets the tone for a night that’s equal parts chaos and critique. The drink name riffs on Moses 7’s apocalyptic vibes, while the intro spirals delightfully through Costco Jesus art, pop-culture detours, and the usual GASP blend of reverence and profanity. The overall energy is loose, a little unhinged, and perfectly primed for talking about prophets who allegedly rearranged geology.

Scriptures: [00:32:04]

Abish tackles Moses 7, comparing the sparse biblical Enoch to the fully weaponized Mormon version who preaches, builds Zion, reroutes rivers, and makes mountains flee like startled pets. She walks through the LDS expansion of Enoch’s story—Zion as a literal utopia, God openly weeping, and a city so righteous it gets yoinked into heaven—then contrasts it with both the Bible’s two-sentence shrug and the apocryphal Enoch who acts more like a cosmic archivist than a social reformer. The segment frames Joseph Smith’s Enoch as less ancient prophet and more ideological prototype for Mormon communal theology.

Church Teachings: [01:02:17]

aaaAAAaaa digs into literalism as a defining and increasingly fragile pillar of Mormon theology, using Moses 7’s “mountains fleeing” as the launch point. Pulling from scripture, JST Genesis, Ensign articles, FAIR apologetics, and conference talks, the segment shows how early and modern leaders framed priesthood power as genuinely world-altering—breaking mountains, dividing seas—while later scholarship quietly reframes that power as symbolic or institutional once evidence fails to cooperate. The result is a sharp exploration of how literal claims are taught with confidence, then softened, spiritualized, or quietly retired when reality refuses to play along.

History: [01:38:39]

Abigail returns for what is jokingly labeled “part four of three” in her Satanic Panic series, tracing how fear-based moral hysteria deepened and spread the more she researched it. This installment situates Mormon culture as uniquely primed for panic—steeped in literal belief, supernatural causality, and rigid authority structures—making members especially vulnerable to conspiracy thinking. The segment underscores how the same literalism that props up prophetic mountain-moving also fuels real-world harm when paranoia is treated as revelation.

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