EP 64: Gray Rock & Glow Up with Julie Danielson: Rebuilding Life After a Toxic Marriage

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura welcomes Julie Danielson—Life Coach, author, host of the "Get Over Divorce" podcast, and creator of the "Get Over Divorce Collective," a coaching program that helps women heal powerfully and create a life they love after divorce. Julie discusses healing after divorce, especially from narcissistic relationships, sharing her personal journey and the challenges of co-parenting with a toxic ex. She offers practical strategies like setting boundaries and using the Gray Rock Method. Together, they emphasize the importance of self-care, supportive communities, and rediscovering joy after trauma. Listeners are encouraged to reclaim their self-worth, embrace new experiences, and connect with resources for ongoing support and empowerment. Key Topics & Timestamps Julie's Divorce Story (00:02:18) Julie shares her background, early marriage, and the personal journey leading to her divorce. Personal Growth After Divorce (00:06:33) Julie discusses her self-improvement, career growth, and the decision to end her marriage. Co-Parenting and Divorce Logistics (00:07:57) Julie explains the divorce process, co-parenting arrangements, and how clear agreements helped. Empowered Dating and Self-Worth (00:11:32) Laura and Julie reflect on dating with self-worth, authenticity, and not shape-shifting for others. How Julie Became a Divorce Coach (00:13:25) Julie describes her journey into coaching, the importance of authentic connections, and building her program. Julie's Second Marriage and Continued Growth (00:15:44) Julie shares meeting her current husband, the growth within a healthy relationship, and career transitions. Building a Coaching Business (00:17:39) Julie talks about starting her coaching business, focusing on helping women through divorce. Narcissistic Abuse vs. "Regular" Divorce (00:18:51) Discussion on the differences between divorcing a narcissist and a typical divorce, and the prevalence of narcissistic abuse. Losing Friends and Outgrowing Social Circles (00:26:31) They discuss how healing and setting boundaries can lead to losing friends who thrived on drama. Neuroplasticity and Healing the Brain (00:35:25) Discussion on how trying new things helps heal the brain after abuse and builds new neural pathways. Advice for Women Newly Divorced (00:37:11) Julie shares the "gray rock" method for dealing with toxic or narcissistic exes and minimizing emotional responses. Turning the Tables on the Narcissist (00:40:09) How gray rocking annoys narcissists and helps reclaim personal power. Handling Provocations and Staying Factual (00:41:42) Advice on not justifying or explaining yourself, sticking to facts, and not reacting to provocations. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Julie, 'As you grow and change, you are reaching new levels.' Julie, 'You don't need that drama in your life. Drama is life-sucking, and drama is what the narcissist surrounds himself with.' Julie, 'Your brain just expanded and you created a new neurotransmitter that says, "Oh, I can do this."' Laura, 'I'm good. And I do not ever have to acknowledge it because I've done too much work. I'm worth more than that. And so I will gray rock my life away.' RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE HEALING GROUP: https://www.patreon.com/c/thatswhereimatpodcast CONNECT WITH JULIE: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/juliedanielson.CHATInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliedanielson_coaching/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@getoverdivorcecoachBook a free Divorce Breakthrough Session with me, I will help you uncover some blocks and blind spots so you can breakthrough to your next level of healing faster. https://www.getoverdivorce.com/scheduleLaura on Julie's podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/144-husbands-behind-a-mask/id1511048997?i=1000659284917The Gray Rock Method https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method "Boundaries aren't walls—they're bridges back to yourself." Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.