E105: Self-Help - Conflict to Connection: Build Stronger Relationships - Kristine Scott (Conflict Resolution Expert)

Conflict is a natural part of life. It's inevitable that we will encounter disagreements and clashes with others from time to time. But what if there was a way to transform conflict into something positive? Something that could actually strengthen our connections with others? It may sound like a superpower, but it's actually something that many people overlook. We often believe that conflict can only have one winner, leading us to miss out on the potential for growth and understanding. In this episode, we will explore how we can navigate conflict and turn it into an opportunity for connection.Kristine ScottIn 2008, Kristine took an AmeriCorps job running a meal program for unhoused young people. Almost 50 youth arrived on Kristine’s first night. What happened next was terrifying. Her purse went missing, there were fights and screaming guests. Kristine vowed to never return. But then something unexpected happened. A 17-year-old guest instantly turned the chaos into quiet, polite behavior with a single phrase. This began Kristine’s journey moving from conflict avoidant to conflict embracing. She has since trained thousands of people how to respond not react, lean in and not lash out.To learn more about Kristine’s mission to create “conflict resolutionaries” wherever she goes, see https://www.seattleconflictresolution.comKristine’s book recommendation (Live Kind, Be Happy)🔥 Our Sponsors: How do you know where to invest your efforts when helping your Agile teams? You could simply ask them, but what if you need a more scalable and robust approach? One platform that I personally use and recommend is Comparative Agility. It has the world's largest Agile maturity index with over 4m data points from over 14,000 organisations. You can try it out completely FREE at the following link, and be sure to let me know your thoughts:👉🏽 https://bit.ly/3Zi5OXw⚡️ In each episode, Paddy Dhanda deep dives into a new human Superpower and practical advice on how you can apply it immediately.👉 Sign-up to Newsletter: https://www.superpowers.school/subscribe👉 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/paddydhanda/★ BUY ME KO-FI ★If you enjoy the podcast, then you can donate a small amount here as a token of your appreciation: https://ko-fi.com/paddydhandaTranscription:[00:01:01] Paddy Dhanda: Dear friend, thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of the Superpower School podcast. I'm your host, Paddy Dhanda, and on today's episode we have a topic that impacts every single one of us in some way or other. And so I have a chief trainer with Seattle Conflict Resolution.Christine Scott has joined me today who's an expert in conflict resolution. Hey, Christine. Welcome to the show. Thank you, Paddy. Christine, you are from the city where Starbucks started. Would you like to tell us a bit more about this wonderful city of yours in case anyone hasn't been there?[00:01:41] Kristine Scott: We like to tell everybody that super rainy and that you don't wanna come here.That way all of the folks that are moving here, we can offset the bad traffic a little bit. But it's beautiful. I've got mountains on one side, the Puget Sound and the ocean on the other orcas and bears and just beautiful, natural stuff. It's great for those of us who like to hike and go[00:02:02] Paddy Dhanda: snowshoeing.Oh, and are you a Starbucks drinker?[00:02:06] Kristine Scott: I actually, I'm pretty scary on coffee, so I am not.[00:02:10] Paddy Dhanda: Oh my God. Oh wow. So they haven't worked their magic with you, so that's disappointing. 'cause I was gonna ask you like, what is the quality of Starbucks there versus anywhere else?It's a bit like Guinness, people say if you have a Guinness in Ireland, it tastes totally different to anywhere else in the world. Because that's where it comes from.[00:02:28] Kristine Scott: Well, that, that's a challenge I might wanna take up. Yeah. The Guinness Challenge, not the coffee challenge.Oh, okay.[00:02:36] Paddy Dhanda: I'm not sure which one I'm more excited about, but yeah, I think both of those would be good for different times of the day maybe. Christine, which superpower would you like to bring to this particular episode?[00:02:45] Kristine Scott: Well, I would love to talk about conflict resolution.The superpower to turn conflict into connection is something that a lot of people miss out on because we have bought this narrative that conflict has only one winner. And so we miss a lot of opportunities to actually turn all of the big feelings and the raw emotion and the honesty that comes with that into connection with others.So there's basically three superpowers that I have identified as a part of good conflict resolution. I would love to talk people through how that works.[00:03:24] Paddy Dhanda: Oh, now you got me intrigued. I can't wait for this conversation. But before we dive in, Christine. I wanna know how you got into this, because a question I often ask my guests is, when ...