For two decades, the United States was home. Then one day, it wasn't.I had built a life on American soil—a career in tech, friendships that spanned cultures, and a sense of belonging I thought was permanent. I paid taxes, chased promotions, and planned a future, believing that my contributions mattered more than a stamp in a passport.But for millions of immigrants, "home" is a fragile concept, resting not on lived experience but on the shifting sands of immigration policy. My "pothole moment" wasn't just a job loss; it was the sudden, jarring realization that my entire identity could be unraveled by a single visa denial. The years of hard work, the community I had built, the very person I had become—all reduced to a bureaucratic decision.*About Life Choices & Potholes* is the story of what happens when the life you've meticulously built is taken away, leaving you with just two suitcases and a one-way ticket to a country the system calls "home"—a place you haven't truly known for twenty years.This is a raw, unflinching look at the human cost of visa instability—the sleepless nights, the constant anxiety, and the disorienting experience of "reverse culture shock" when you become a foreigner in your own land. It’s about the absurdity of having to prove your worth all over again, captured in the skeptical interview question: **"So you lived abroad? Now what?"**.My journey back to India was a bureaucratic odyssey, from a frantic, cross-country visa application sprint just to be able to fly back to the U.S. in an emergency, to the logistical nightmare of transporting my dog, Sauli, across continents. It’s a story of navigating not just Mumbai’s chaotic streets but also the emotional labyrinth of starting over when you feel you belong nowhere—too American for India, too Indian for America.This memoir goes beyond policy debates to explore the real, human toll of a system that can halt careers, defer dreams, and challenge your very identity and dignity. It's for anyone who has ever lived in the limbo between visas, who has felt the ground shift beneath their feet, or who understands that "home" is not just a place on a map, but a life you build.Because when your right to belong is questioned, the biggest pothole you face isn't on the road—it’s the one that forms in your heart.👉 About Life Choices & Potholes is my memoir of resilience, identity, and starting over. You can find it here: https://amzn.to/45QpjNe

What happens when the life you meticulously planned for two decades collapses? In this riveting episode, we dive into the memoir About Life Choices & Potholes by Kay Jay, framing her journey as a powerful debate between two opposing forces: the relentless pursuit of a structured, Western ideal of success versus the chaotic, resilient, and unpredictable path of starting over.On one side of the debate: The carefully constructed identity. A successful software engineer in San Francisco with an overpriced latte, a five-year plan, and a life built on corporate efficiency and convenience. This is the voice of stability, ambition, and the dream of making it in America—a life where success is measured by job titles, and home is a place you build, not one you return to.On the other side: The great Indian return. A life thrust upon her by a jarring "pothole moment"—job loss, heartbreak, and sheer exhaustion. This side argues for embracing the fall, for navigating the absurdity of reverse culture shock, and for finding a new definition of success that has nothing to do with a corporate ladder. It's a life of haggling with auto-wallahs, dealing with landlords who wage war over crow-feeding, and discovering that jugaad (making things work) is the ultimate survival skill.Join us as we explore the central conflicts of this raw and hilarious memoir:• Career & Identity: Is a "real" engineer one who builds dams, as her father insists, or one who builds the digital world? We debate the generational clash over what constitutes meaningful work and the absurdity of proving your worth through resumes when you've lived between two worlds.• Love & Letting Go: From the ex who reappears at a wedding with emotional "breadcrumbs" to the Zoom romance that fizzles in the real world, we dissect the messy landscape of modern relationships. When is it time to walk away from an "almost love" and choose yourself?• Home & Belonging: What does "home" truly mean when your childhood house is demolished and you feel like a foreigner in your own land? This episode tackles the profound disorientation of losing your visa, your sense of belonging, and realizing the life you built over two decades can be reduced to two suitcases.• The Ultimate Question: Are life's potholes devastating setbacks or the universe's way of rerouting you to where you truly belong?Tune in for a story about reinvention, resilience, and the difficult, often comical, journey of learning that smooth roads make for boring stories.About Life Choices & Potholeshttps://amzn.to/45QpjNeAlso Available in Indiahttps://amzn.in/d/5L17dUg

In this episode, we delve into author Kay Jay’s "Beautiful Men" series, examining the intricate storytelling of The Dog Walker and The Chef. While some critics dismiss The Dog Walker as a narrative misstep—citing repetitive narration and an awkward protagonist—others see that very discomfort as the point: a bold experiment in portraying raw longing, messy affection, and the unpolished reality of love. We’ll unpack how Kay Jay deliberately resists the polished arcs of conventional romance to embrace vulnerability, embarrassment, and emotional honesty. Along the way, we’ll explore The Chef as a tonal counterpoint, examine the author’s inspirations drawn from her life as a novelist and devoted dog mom, and ask: what happens when romance refuses to follow the rules?Author Website: https://kjgupte.com/writers-lounge/Beautiful Men: https://amzn.to/463SY5CMore Books from the author: https://amzn.to/4gpcSLY