Descriptive Communication with Leadership Coach Joppe Quaedvlieg

In this episode, I’m joined by leadership coach and community builder Joppe Quaedvlieg for a heartfelt conversation about communication, personal agency, and what it actually takes to create trust, safety, and belonging, and how we can do this rather simply with one interaction at a time.

Joppe is the creator of Descriptive Communication, a practical approach to expressing what we want and need in ways that others can actually understand. His work grew out of lived experience: years of not knowing what he wanted, learning to people-please, and eventually realizing how much of our suffering and lost opportunity results from not being able to express ourselves clearly - to ourselves or to others.

We explore:

• Why the question “What do you want?” is so difficult but also transformative
• How vague language hides practical needs
• The link between clarity, nervous system safety, and trust
• Why descriptive communication builds agency, courage, and responsibility
• How community is created not through good intentions, but clear asks
• What leadership, relationships, and collaboration look like when honesty replaces performance
• Joppe's views on sisu

Joppe also shared his own poem, “I Consider Us a Village,” and walks us through the thinking behind his community practice Help Me Help You, showing how simple, specific requests can unlock collective resources we already have but rarely use.

I found the conversation both philosophical and practical. It’s about language, but even more it is about presence and the courage to be real with each other.

If you’re interested in leadership development, want tips to improve your relationships or are a community builder, or more generally, yo want to learn how to communicate with more clarity, this episode offers tools that you can start testing out immediately.

Check out Joppe's work at his website artiqula.com. There you can find his courses, coaching offerings, and also Joppe's 2025 book Reaching Escape Velocity!

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Sisu is a reserve of inner strength but it's also a way for us to know ourselves and impact the world in a positive way. Cultivating these reserves of inner strength starts with self-care and continues through self-inquiry. its power then extends to the world through our inspired acts of deep courage and compassion.

Thanks for tuning in! You can find out more about sisu, find links to research, and check out Gentle Power: A Revolution in How We Think, Lead, and Succeed Using the Finnish Art of Sisu at www.sisulab.com.

Sisu is great, love is greatness.