Welcome back to the Don’t Pick the Scab Podcast—the place where post-divorce scars turn into your greatest superpower! I’m David, your host, and today we’re tackling a subject that’s rarely talked about but absolutely life-changing for men over 40: sexual energy transformation.

Whether you’re newly single or still healing from divorce, this episode is for YOU. Our special guest, Matt Cook, has coached over 80,000 men worldwide to reclaim their confidence, rebuild intimacy, and channel raw sexual energy into EVERY area of life—not just the bedroom! 😎✨

Here’s what you’ll discover in this episode:

• How to overcome performance anxiety and “stage fright” when dating or starting a new sexual relationship after divorce.

• The powerful mindset shift: Why you don’t “control” your penis—and why that’s actually liberating!

• Matt’s #1 bedroom hack: You don’t need an erection to enjoy and give pleasure—plus, why this can transform your confidence overnight.

• Why focusing on your own pleasure (instead of “performing” for her) is the secret to stress-free, deeply connected sex.

• The porn trap: How high-speed video porn hijacks your sexual energy and what you can do to detox, rewire your brain, and feel truly alive again.

• The science of oxytocin: How “old school” romance, eye contact, and non-sexual touch can rebuild your libido, banish anxiety, and spark real intimacy—even if you’ve struggled for years.

• Why scheduling sex (instead of waiting for “spontaneity”) is the relationship hack men over 40 need to keep love and passion alive.

• Dating advice for men over 40: Why meeting women in person beats dating apps, and Matt’s simple steps to confidently connect, flirt, and build attraction—no games, just real results.

• The “shock absorber” mindset: How to stay grounded, masculine, and emotionally strong (and why this is so attractive to women).

• The truth about mismatched libido, menopause, and what REALLY keeps intimacy alive long-term.

If you’re ready to banish shame, ditch performance anxiety, and step into a new era of confidence, healing, and abundance after divorce—this episode will give you the roadmap. Matt’s practical, no-BS advice will help you laugh, learn, and take action.

matt

👇 What’s one question or struggle you have about dating, sex, or confidence after 40? Drop it in the comments—I read every one and love connecting with you guys!

If this episode helped you, don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share with a fellow man who needs it. Your comeback starts now! 🚀

Matt Cook Website

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Welcome back to the Don’t Pick the Scab Podcast! In this episode, host David sits down with the inspiring Tim Tamashiro—bestselling author, keynote speaker, and part-time monk—to explore how men over 40 can truly heal and find purpose after divorce. If you’re feeling lost, stuck, or just plain tired of suffering, this conversation is for you. 🧘‍♂️💬

Why Do We Suffer So Much After Divorce?

Tim shares his own journey through a recent divorce after 28 years of marriage, revealing how suffering is a natural part of life—but it doesn’t have to define you. Drawing from ancient Buddhist wisdom, neuroscience, and his own “part-time monk” mindset, Tim explains the concept of the “second arrow”: while the first arrow (divorce) is unavoidable, the second arrow (repeated suffering) is optional. Learn how to stop picking the scab and start healing for real. 🩹

Rediscovering Purpose with Ikigai.

Many men define themselves by their roles as husbands and fathers. After divorce, it’s easy to feel lost. Tim introduces the Japanese concept of Ikigai—your reason for being—and shows how curiosity, wonder, and self-compassion can help you redefine your identity and find new meaning in life, even after 40. 🌱

Practical Tools for Healing

• Mindfulness & Meditation: Learn how to shift from your “default brain” (the old, reactive part) to your “design brain” (the mindful, intentional part).

• Humor as Medicine: David and Tim share how laughter—even at the absurdity of divorce—can be a powerful tool for healing and releasing anger.

• Letting Go of Control: Struggling with what happens at your ex’s house? Tim shares the Buddhist parable of the second arrow and offers actionable advice for releasing the need to control what you can’t.

• Therapy & Positive Psychology: Why seeking help isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom.

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The Unexpected Benefits of Divorce Tim and David discuss how divorce, while painful, can also be a chance to reinvent yourself, rediscover what makes you happy, and build a life that’s truly yours. From enjoying the little things (like a spoon left on the counter!) to embracing change, this episode is packed with hope and practical wisdom. 🌟

Join the Conversation! How have you found purpose or healing after divorce? What’s your “second arrow,” and how are you learning to let it go? Drop a comment below and share your story—your experience could help another man on his journey. 👇

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and hit the bell so you never miss an episode of Don’t Pick the Scab Podcast. If you want to share your story or have a question for David, leave it in the comments!

Remember: Suffer less, happy more. Let’s heal together! 💬🧘‍♂️

Tim on YouTube

#DivorceRecovery #MenOver40 #DontPickTheScab #Ikigai #HealingAfterDivorce

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Are you a man over 40 facing divorce and feeling overwhelmed by the process? You’re not alone—and you don’t have to go through it blindly. In this episode of the Don’t Pick the Scab Podcast, host David sits down with Joe Dillon, a seasoned divorce mediator with a unique blend of financial expertise and deep personal insight. Joe’s mission? To help men like you navigate the emotional and financial minefields of divorce with clarity, confidence, and fairness. 💪

Joe brings 28 years of mediation experience and an MBA in finance to the table, making him a rare expert who understands both the numbers and the emotions behind every tough conversation. Most mediators are lawyers or mental health professionals, but Joe’s financial background means he can break down the real costs of divorce—child support, alimony, property division—and help you see the big picture, not just the dollar signs. 💵

In this candid conversation, you’ll discover:

• Why 75% of divorce is about the numbers—and how to make them work for you

• How to avoid the courtroom drama and keep control of your future

• The biggest mistakes men over 40 make during divorce (and how to avoid them)

• How to handle the emotional rollercoaster, even if you think you’re “fine”

• Why mediation leads to better outcomes for you and your kids

• The truth about “fair” settlements—and why it’s about lifestyle, not just money

• How to prepare for mediation, stay calm, and negotiate like a pro

• What to do if you’re stuck in anger or blame—and how to break the cycle

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Joe shares his personal story of growing up in a litigated divorce, the lessons he learned, and why he’s passionate about helping men avoid the same mistakes. You’ll also get practical strategies for budgeting, negotiating, and keeping your cool—even when emotions run high. 🧘‍♂️

If you’re ready to move forward, protect your finances, and build a better future for yourself and your kids, this episode is a must-listen. Don’t let anger or confusion dictate your next chapter—get the tools and insights you need to thrive after divorce.

👉 What’s your biggest fear or question about divorce mediation? Drop a comment below and let’s talk about it! If you found this episode helpful, hit LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE with a friend who needs it.

#DivorceRecovery #MenOver40 #DivorceMediation #DontPickTheScab #DivorceAdvice #Podcast

Everything Joe Dillon

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