"People who dwell in the past get stuck in the past." - Marc Andreessen. (https://www.youtube.com/shorts/b6Zw50f5jJk)

"Introspection causes emotional disorders." - Andreessen again.

"Reinforcing negative neural pathways via therapy or introspection is a recipe for disaster." - Elon Musk.

“And also, this is very important to understand about me, I am not into psychoanalysis, right. I think there is far too much of it and I think people spend far too long, constantly analysing themselves. I do what I do because I believe in it.” - Tony Blair

This idea is gaining traction, especially among a certain group of guys: that self-awareness is not only not helpful, but that it's actively harmful. It might take some of your edge away and leave you prone to introspection. As therapists and couples coaches, Matt & Graham are interested in why the idea is gaining ground, and how to work with those men, whether they want individual work or come to them as part of a couple. Short answer: we don't try and convince them that going back to their childhoods and spending lots of time understanding themselves and feeling their feelings is the way forward. We move quickly to show them how therapy can help them solve practical problems in their lives.

If you'd like to work with Graham or Matt, you can find them at www.grahamjohnston.uk and www.matwotton.com

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Matt and Graham dive into the Manosphere on this episode of Crazy In Love. They respond to the recent Louis Theroux documentary on Netflix and this article which suggests Gen Z men are more likely to demand that their wives obey them:

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2026/mar/05/gen-z-men-baby-boomers-wives-should-obey-husbands

But what's the reality behind young men's beliefs about women? Should we be worried, or is this a moral panic similar to Grand Theft Auto and gangsta rap? How much influence do the likes of Andrew Tate have on young men? Are young women more at threat from predatory beliefs and values of their partners?

They draw on this thread from Owen Winter looking at the British Election Study:

https://x.com/OwenWntr/status/1902986069508780493

And this report from Male Allies UK:

https://www.maleallies.co.uk/voice-of-the-boys-report/

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Matt and Graham get their teeth into some advice from couples therapists about seven signs you might be heading for divorce, ranging from "you stop arguing" to "you take up ultramarathons" (yes, really).

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2026/feb/20/seven-surprising-signs-youre-heading-for-divorce

Along the way, in considering all seven, they return to some time-old signs of relationships longevity and fulfilment such as treating each other with respect and retaining some independence.

Jump in and enjoy!

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