We try to guess comments pertaining to cryptids. Alternate titles for this episode were The Ohio Files, Metal Orcas, Boujee Aliens, The Clown Prince of the Swamp and Good ol’ Trolls.

Today we look at comments pertaining to animals. Topics include whether you should kiss your pet hedgehog (no), if Dodos were tasty, and which animal can eat with both sides of its body. Nick has a New York Times subscription and Sam has Reddit.

In our first zoological episode, we read comments about animals. Topics and tangents include: whether Joe Exotic would make a good pet, Elder Scrolls, Russians versus Floridians versus Hippos, cryptids, and prehensile penises.

We sift through comments on movie trailers. Topics covered include a protracted discussion of You, Me and Dupree, Idiocracy coming true, Renfield, Ren Faires, and semi-forgotten Best Picture winners.

We're back doing movies. In this episode, we look at comments on new and old movie trailers. Topics include: unauthorized biopics, Gerard Butler, Tetris intrigue, and mid-2000s era comedies.

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We read comments about well-known people. Topics and tangents include why people hate poetry, guillotine etiquette, and Rasputin.

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We read comment threads about people living and dead. (Mostly dead). Tangents include wrestling jargon, teenage AI, and the movie 300.

Email: closedcommentspodcast@gmail.com

In our second work-related episode, we try to make sense of comments about people's careers. Topics discussed include gamer mayors, renaissance faires, familiarity with death, lifeguard traps, elite priests, and The Good Nurse.

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