Kathryn Gordon is the co-author of the bestselling book "Relationship GRIT" and wife of best selling author Jon Gordon.

Kathryn discusses her candid journey of nearly 30 years of marriage.

Using remarkable vulnerability, Kathryn reveals the framework that helped her and Jon overcome significant challenges and build a thriving relationship that's stood the test of time.

[EMBED PLAYER HERE]

• [00:03:15] 👋 Kathryn introduces herself and her journey from behind-the-scenes supporter to author and entrepreneur
• [00:06:40] 💘 The unexpected and persistent way she and John met (and almost didn't meet!)
• [00:11:20] 💔 Early marriage challenges and how they navigated having children while building businesses
• [00:15:30] 🧠 Introduction to the G.R.I.T. framework: God, Resolve, Invest, Together
• [00:18:45] 💯 Why perfect-looking couples often end up divorced
• [00:21:10] ⚖️ Why you shouldn't keep score in your relationship
• [00:24:30] 👏 The transformative power of complimenting your partner
• [00:28:15] 💪 Focusing on strengths instead of weaknesses
• [00:32:40] 🗣️ Why "where there is a void in communication, negativity will fill it"
• [00:35:50] 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 The importance of regular family team meetings
• [00:39:20] 🚶‍♀️ Why walking together transforms difficult conversations
• [00:43:15] 🎢 Kathryn's one lesson for listeners: "Relationships are like riding a rollercoaster"

• G - God: Putting faith at the center of your relationship
• R - Resolve: Commitment to work through challenges instead of walking away
• I - Invest: Continuously investing time and energy in your relationship
• T - Together: Making decisions and facing obstacles as a united team

• Don't keep score - relationships have seasons where give and take naturally fluctuate
• Compliment each other regularly - even (especially) when you don't feel like it
• Focus on strengths, not weaknesses - appreciate what your partner excels at
• Communicate expectations clearly - don't expect mind-reading
• Have regular family/couple team meetings
• Walk and talk - side-by-side communication reduces confrontation

In this week's conversation, Joe Ciccarone sits down with Stephen Marche, acclaimed Canadian writer and cultural commentator whose work appears in The New Yorker, The Atlantic, and The New York Times.

Stephen shares insights from his book "On Writing and Failure," discussing the inevitable struggles of the creative process, the realities of rejection, and why perseverance might be the only thing that truly matters.

02:15 - Introduction to Stephen Marche and his diverse writing career 🖋️

04:30 - The power of short-form books and the Voltaire quote about pocket pamphlets 📖

07:10 - "The first job of a writer is to write. The second is to persevere." 💪

09:45 - Herman Melville's tragic story: how Moby Dick sold fewer than 400 copies 📚

12:30 - James Joyce couldn't even get hired to teach English as a second language 😮

15:20 - "Trying to find fulfillment in writing is like trying to learn how to fly by jumping off a cliff" 🧠

17:40 - Anne Frank's diary was rejected 15 times by publishers 📝

19:25 - The gap between intention, action, and consequence in creative work ⏳

22:10 - Why success is temporary and often disconnected from quality of work 🏆

24:30 - Margaret Atwood's story about still feeling insecure despite enormous success 🌟

26:15 - Depression as an occupational hazard in writing careers 😔

28:45 - "The quality of your writing has very little effect on the success of your career, but it's the only thing that matters" 💯

31:20 - Stephen's experience writing for Esquire and the intensive editorial process 🔍

35:10 - Why there's no such thing as required reading 📚

37:40 - Cormac McCarthy didn't sell more than 5,000 copies until he was 60 📖

41:35 - Stephen's writing routine: sleep as a creative superpower 💤

46:20 - The myth of alcohol fueling creativity 🍺

48:50 - Stephen's one lesson for aspiring writers 🎯

50:15 - Current projects and spending a day with Shakespeare 🎭

Stephen Marche is a Canadian writer, cultural commentator, and novelist. His work regularly appears in The New Yorker, The Atlantic, and The New York Times. With a PhD in Shakespeare studies, Marche brings both scholarly depth and journalistic clarity to his writing. His book

In this entertaining and inspiring episode, Joe Ciccarone sits down with Tim Conniff, who transitioned from being a healthcare sales director to a full-time stand-up comedian and keynote speaker. Tim shares his remarkable journey from bombing a college speech to becoming a successful comedian, proving it's never too late to try something new.

01:45 - Introduction to Tim Conniff and his multiple roles in life 🙋‍♂️

03:20 - Tim's first experience with public speaking in college and how badly it went 😅

05:10 - The 30-year gap between Tim's first comedy experience and his return to the stage 📅

08:15 - How Tim's son quitting basketball opened up time for him to pursue comedy 🏀

10:30 - The moment Tim had his "I can do that" realization at a local comedy club 💡

12:45 - Tim's rapid rise in comedy: from open mic to hosting shows in just six months 🚀

15:20 - The challenge and rewards of being a "clean" comedian in today's landscape 🧼

18:40 - Tim's creative process for writing and refining jokes 📝

21:15 - The structure of jokes and how comedians work to get laughs every 6-15 seconds ⏱️

23:30 - How Tim balances his corporate career with his comedy pursuits 💼

25:45 - Tim's keynote "Your Comfort Zone Is No Joke" and its message 🎤

27:10 - The powerful question: "When was the last time you did something for the first time?" 🤔

29:45 - Tim's experience performing for patients with traumatic brain injuries 💪

32:20 - Simple ways to get out of your comfort zone that anyone can try 🌱

35:10 - Tim's personal practices for clearing his mind (running and hot yoga) 🧘‍♂️

38:40 - The ONE lesson Tim hopes listeners take away 🔑

40:15 - Fun closing questions: dream day with Zig Ziglar or Jim Rohn 🌟

Tim Conniff is a former sales director for a large healthcare company who now focuses full-time on his work as a stand-up comedian and keynote speaker. After rediscovering his passion for comedy in 2022, Tim quickly rose from open mic performer to hosting shows and delivering paid gigs across the Philadelphia area. His keynote "Your Comfort Zone Is No Joke" combines clean comedy with inspirational messages about challenging yourself and trying new things.

• It's never too late to try something new - Tim started his comedy career in earnest at middle age
• Having an "I can do that" moment instead of saying "I could never do that" can change your life
• The iterative process is crucial - in comedy, sports, or any skill, you improve through consistent practice
• Clean comedy creates more opportunities and challenges you to be a better writer
• Getting out of your comfort zone leads to growth, new opportunities, and a more fulfilling life
• When you help enough people get what they want, you'll get what you want (Zig Ziglar)

• Website: TimConniff.com
• Instagram: @TimConniff

In this powerful episode, Joe Ciccarone sits down with Jim Murphy, author of the viral sensation "Inner Excellence" that was famously read by Eagles wide receiver AJ Brown on the sidelines during a game. Jim shares his remarkable journey from minor league baseball player to mental skills coach for elite athletes, and how his book rocketed from Amazon ranking #532,000 to #1 overnight.

00:05 - Introduction to Jim Murphy and his background in mental skills coaching 🧠

03:12 - The viral moment when AJ Brown was spotted reading "Inner Excellence" on the NFL sidelines 📱

06:45 - Jim's personal journey: from financial struggles to overnight success 💰

09:30 - Understanding "Inner Excellence" philosophy and the concept that "every beginning has an end and every ending has a new beginning" 🔄

12:15 - Jim discusses how losing his baseball vision led to a greater vision for his life 👁️

15:40 - The core philosophy: "What's essential is invisible to the eye" and focusing on what truly matters ❤️

18:22 - How to be "unoffendable and unirritatable" in a world full of criticism 🛡️

21:10 - The importance of understanding that "your opponent is not your enemy, but your partner in the dance" 🤝

23:45 - Freedom to choose your thoughts - breaking negative thought patterns 💭

26:30 - The PALMS acronym for ego: Possessions, Achievements, Looks, Money, and Status 🌴

28:15 - "We do not climb mountains to get to the top. We climb them to see who we can become" 🏔️

31:40 - Jim's personal practices for clearing his mind and recharging (including cold plunging!) ❄️

34:10 - The one lesson Jim hopes listeners take away: slow down and ask God how you can grow 🙏

36:25 - Fun closing questions: dream day with the Obamas and tattoo quote "Selfless is Fearless" ✨

Jim Murphy is a #1 NY Times Best Selling author and mental skills coach who works with professional athletes and high-performers. His book "Inner Excellence" focuses on training the mind for extraordinary performance and the best possible life. After Eagles wide receiver AJ Brown was seen reading the book on the sidelines during a January 2025 game, the book skyrocketed from selling 2-3 copies a day to over 100,000 copies in a week, achieving the coveted #1 spot on the New York Times bestseller list.

• Instagram: @InnerExcellenceJimMurphy
• Twitter: @InnerExcellence
• Website: innerexcellence.com

In this powerful episode, we sit down with Dr. Hillary Cauthen, clinical sports psychologist and author of "Hello Trauma, Our Invisible Teammate."

Dr. Cauthen shares her expertise on understanding trauma's impact on performance, developing resilience, and creating a culture that champions growth and healing.

00:45 - Introduction to Dr. Hillary Cauthen - clinical sports psychologist, author, podcaster, and mom of four

02:15 - Dr. Hillary's journey from athlete to sports psychology - moving to Maine and recognizing the need for specialized mental performance coaching

05:20 - Defining trauma as a physiological response that our brain makes meaning of

06:30 - The prevalence of trauma - 70% of adults have experienced trauma (reported cases only)

08:45 - Different trauma responses and how they impact recovery

10:35 - The three ways people deal with trauma: minimizer, enabler, and moral authority

14:20 - Seven steps to dealing with trauma

15:10 - Step 1: Acknowledge that something happened

16:15 - Step 2: Seek feedback and consult experts

17:20 - Step 3: Conduct conversations with care with everyone involved

18:30 - Step 4: Ask people what they need instead of assuming

20:15 - Step 5: Create a plan of action together

21:00 - Step 6: Discuss action steps and keep each other updated

22:10 - The power of hope in the healing process

22:45 - Emotional hygiene and the importance of mental wellness check-ins

24:30 - Balancing empathetic engagement with accountable action

26:45 - The difference between culture and climate in organizations

28:20 - The importance of finding people doing high-level work and learning from them

31:10 - The power of journaling for mental health and clarity

36:40 - Questions to ask yourself: "What is my role right now?" and "What's the one thing I need to do?"

39:30 - Share Your Secrets: How Dr. Hillary recharges (music, naps, bubble baths)

42:00 - The power of napping for performance enhancement

43:50 - Book recommendation: "The Tao of Pooh"

44:30 - One lesson to take away: "Be a good human and have empathy"

45:10 - If Dr. Hillary could spend a day with anyone: her grandfather

46:30 - Dr. Hillary's tattoo: "My heart is your heart, your heart is my heart"

In this episode of the Built Not Born Podcast, Joe welcomes author and entrepreneur Phil Van Treuren to explore how ancient Stoic philosophy can transform our modern lives.

Phil is the author of "The Little Book of Stoic Quotes," and shares profound insights on living in the present moment, embracing obstacles, and finding peace in our chaotic world.

• Author, entrepreneur, and "perpetual work in progress"
• Built a successful DTC e-commerce business from his basement
• Published four books on Stoic philosophy lessons
• Founder of Stoic Simple, where he sells his books and publishes blog posts

• Phil's one-sentence definition after a year of research
• Why Stoicism has experienced a renaissance in modern culture
• Recommendations for beginners: Ryan Holiday and Donald Robertson

• Why humans struggle to stay present compared to animals
• How focusing on the past leads to depression and looking too far ahead causes anxiety
• Seneca's wisdom: "The primary cause of both hope and fear is that instead of adapting ourselves to present circumstances, we send our thoughts to the future"

• How to embrace and love whatever fate you're given
• Finding opportunities in obstacles and challenging circumstances
• Using difficulties to become a better person

• Writing entire books on his cell phone while juggling family life
• How limitations forced him to become a better writer
• Embracing and loving the constraints of your circumstances

• The misconception that Stoicism means suppressing emotions
• Learning to step back and examine emotions before acting on them
• Creating space between stimulus and response

• How remembering mortality can spur positive action
• Planning meaningful experiences with loved ones
• Removing the ego from thinking time is guaranteed

• Comparing Seneca, Epictetus, and Marcus Aurelius
• The unique writing styles and contributions of each philosopher
• Phil's appreciation for different aspects of each Stoic master

• A quiz testing knowledge of real Marcus Aurelius quotes versus movie lines
• The surprising connection between the movie and actual Stoic philosophy

• Finding comfort in knowing the world will continue without you
• How this perspective brings peace and reduces ego
• Our responsibility to make the world better for future generations

• "The Little Book of

In this episode, Joe welcomes back best selling author Derek Sivers for a deep dive into his new book "Useful, Not True" and explores how our beliefs shape our reality. Derek shares insights on choosing beliefs that serve us better and making peace with what we can't control.

🕒 00:00 - 03:45 - Introduction and catching up

• Jiu-jitsu training space as a podcast background
• Previous podcast appearance discussion
• Derek's book writing process

🕒 03:46 - 12:30 - Exploring "Useful, Not True"

• Core concept of choosing beneficial beliefs
• Derek's research journey through philosophy and religion
• Writing approach and keeping books concise

🕒 12:31 - 20:15 - Emotions and Decision Making

• How emotions decide before logic kicks in
• The importance of mental state
• Strategies for controlling emotional responses

🕒 20:16 - 28:45 - Questions for Self-Reflection

• Identifying outdated beliefs
• Dealing with distractions
• Finding your top priority

🕒 28:46 - 35:30 - Making Peace with Uncertainty

• Being okay regardless of outcomes
• Derek's experience moving from Oxford to New Zealand
• Adapting to unexpected changes

🕒 35:31 - 45:00 - Rapid Fire Questions

• Best investments in life
• Dealing with overwhelm
• Future plans and priorities

1. Choose beliefs based on their usefulness rather than absolute truth
2. Control your response to situations by managing your mental state
3. Regularly question whether your old beliefs still serve you
4. Journal daily to gain clarity when feeling overwhelmed
5. There's always another way to look at any situation

• 📖 "Useful, Not True" by Derek Sivers
• 📖 "Hell Yeah or No" by Derek Sivers
• 🎙️ Derek's Previous episode: Built Not Born (#66) - Hell Yeah or No

• Website: sive.rs
• Book: Useful, Not True
• Contact: Say Hello to Derek

© 2025 Built Not Born Podcast. All rights reserved.

#BuiltNotBorn #DerekSivers #UsefulNotTrue #Entrepreneurship #PersonalDevelopment #JoeCiccarone #MindsetShift #Podcast #Philly #NewZealand #Beliefs #true #author #books

💫 "I wanted to be part of something bigger than myself. And that's what my father helped me with - he led me in the right direction. The biggest team there is, is the United States military." - Lt. Colonel Jodi Pritchard

Featured in James Patterson's #1 New York Times bestseller "Walk In My Combat Boots: True Stories from America's Bravest Warriors," Lt. Colonel Jodi Pritchard (USAF) shares her remarkable journey from a West Virginia farm to becoming a distinguished Air Force flight nurse and CCAT (Critical Care Air Transport) team leader.

⏱️ Time Stamps:

[00:00] - Introduction and family military legacy

[03:45] - First deployment to Operation Enduring Freedom

[07:30] - Powerful story of transporting wounded and fallen soldiers

[12:15] - Experience of taking fire while landing in Baghdad

[16:20] - The mindset required at age 22 in combat situations

[21:30] - Story of soldiers' resilience and brotherhood

[26:45] - Mental health challenges and breaking the stigma

[32:15] - The importance of decompression after deployment

[37:30] - The meaning behind her memorial tattoo

[42:15] - Advice for aspiring military medical personnel

[45:30] - The importance of remaining humble

[48:45] - Behind the scenes with James Patterson and the book

🎖️ Four generations of military service in her family

🚁 20+ years as a medevac flight nurse

🏥 Critical missions transporting wounded warriors

💪 Mental resilience and PTSD awareness

🌟 Leadership lessons from combat experience

"You're the best part of their worst day." - On being a medivac flight nurse

"Never stop believing in yourself." - Lt. Col. Jodi Pritchard

Lt. Colonel Pritchard's story is featured in James Patterson's & Matt Eversmann's "Walk In My Combat Boots" (2021), which shares 45 powerful stories from America's service members. Her profile particularly focuses on her critical missions during Operation Enduring Freedom and her role in medical evacuations.

🎙️ Built Not Born Podcast