Why does someone who divorces a narcissist keep going back to them?

A listener writes in, “My best friend divorced her narcissistic ex two months ago — but she keeps talking to him, then ignoring him, then reaching out again. She says she wants to move on, but she can't seem to break the cycle.”

In this episode, Dr. Kerry explains why leaving a narcissist doesn't automatically break the trauma bond and why survivors struggle to escape.

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If you'd like Dr. Kerry to answer your question on air, email it to clients@kerrymcavoyphd.com or use this link.

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Break free from narcissistic abuse with ReclaimYou. The app that's like having Dr. Kerry as your personal coach in your pocket 24/7. Get personalized support, healing exercises, and expert guidance whenever you need it. Join the waitlist now and be first to reclaim your life at studio.com/drkerry

Resources

• ReclaimYou: Dr. Kerry's AI-powered coaching app
• The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
• First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
• Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

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Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D, a retired psychologist & author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationships and deconstructing narcissism.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice. If you are in crisis, please call 911 or your local emergency number.

Have you ever felt completely drained after spending time with certain people in your life?

This week, Coach Dan Ratner joins Dr. Kerry to explore the hidden world of emotional vampires: the 12 types of energy-draining people we all have in our lives and why narcissists are the most dangerous of them all. Dan shares his powerful KEEPER framework for identifying who truly deserves a place in your life.

PODCAST EXTRA EXCLUSIVE SEGMENT

Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here: https://substack.com/@breakingfreenarcabuse

MORE ABOUT THE PODCAST EXTRA INTERVIEW

🔹 Already know you have an emotional vampire in your life? Here's what to do next.

Coach Dan breaks down practical strategies for managing toxic people you can't simply cut out — from family members to coworkers — and how to protect your emotional energy without blowing everything up.

DANIEL RATNER is a relationship coach, speaker, and author helping people build healthier connections by recognizing draining patterns and setting stronger boundaries. A former entrepreneur turned personal growth expert, he is the author of Infinite Marriage and The Ten Secrets to a Passionate Marriage, with his upcoming book, Emotional Vampires, teaching readers how to protect their happiness from toxic people. Through his coaching, books, and public talks, Daniel provides clear, practical tools for improving self-esteem, cultivating "keepers," and creating relationships that fuel joy.

GET HIS BOOK
Emotional Vampires: How to Protect Your Happiness from People Who Will Suck You Dry

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Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Break free from narcissistic abuse with ReclaimYou. The app that's like having Dr. Kerry as your personal coach in your pocket 24/7. Get personalized support, healing exercises, and expert guidance whenever you need it. Join the waitlist now and be first to reclaim your life at studio.com/drkerry

Resources

• ReclaimYou: Dr. Kerry's AI-powered coaching app
• The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
• First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
• Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Dr. Kerry!

• Youtube
• Instagram
• TikTok
• Facebook

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D, a retired psychologist & author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationships and deconstructing narcissism.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice. If you are in crisis, please call 911 or your local emergency number.

Take the Toxic or Troubled? Quiz and get specialized help for your specific situation. https://kerrymcavoyphd.fillout.com/toxic-troubled-survey

My 62-year-old narcissistic brother moved in with my 86-year-old mother "temporarily" after his divorce six years ago. Now she's suffocating, the rest of the family stays away, and she won't let anyone intervene.

In this episode, Dr. Kerry explains why some mothers choose guilt over peace — and what to do when someone refuses to set healthy relationship limits for themselves. Learn how to protect your own nervous system while supporting a parent who is trapped by fear, obligation, and guilt.

Submit Your Question

If you'd like Dr. Kerry to answer your question on air, email it to clients@kerrymcavoyphd.com or use this link.

Follow on Apple

Follow on Spotify

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Break free from narcissistic abuse with ReclaimYou. The app that's like having Dr. Kerry as your personal coach in your pocket 24/7. Get personalized support, healing exercises, and expert guidance whenever you need it. Join the waitlist now and be first to reclaim your life at studio.com/drkerry

Resources

• ReclaimYou: Dr. Kerry's AI-powered coaching app
• The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
• First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
• Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Dr. Kerry!

• Youtube
• Instagram
• TikTok
• Facebook

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D, a retired psychologist & author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationships and deconstructing narcissism.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice. If you are in crisis, please call 911 or your local emergency number.