Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck

Maurice James is a comedian, host, actor, and co-creator of Kinky Comedy from Jackson, Mississippi where his formal sex education came from an Episcopalian school science class taught by a teacher who carried a petrified bull testicle cane… and where sex ed mostly felt like mitosis and meiosis rather than anything connected to his own body.

Want to her Maurice and I unfiltered reading Reddit stories? Join the afterparty over on Patreon!
https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck

Where to find Maurice:
Instagram: @mauricejamescomedy & @kinkycomedy

Kinky Comedy: https://www.kinkycomedy.com

Where to find Arielle:
Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck
TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck

Bonus stories found exclusively on Patreon

• STORY 1: My life has imploded. Husband 29M slept with my mom 55F right before we got married two years ago.
• STORY 2: I told my girlfriend I sometimes think about other girls during sex and she lost it

Like your jewlery a bit kinky? Me too. Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here: https://lovecrave.com/arielle

Episode Cheat Sheet

02:32 The origin of Kinky Comedy and bringing kink and comedy together
04:11 Why being a good Dom requires communication, trust and emotional intelligence
08:14 Yes / No / Maybe lists and negotiating kink scenes
10:33 Why sex is like producing a film or planning a journey
12:57 Rope bondage, body awareness and communicating boundaries
15:08 Practicing "no" and learning to hold boundaries
19:11 Maurice's unexpected introduction to kink at a Tinder dinner party
21:21 Why kink communities value clarity and communication
23:41 Shame, sexuality and the fear of being rejected by community
25:59 Coming out as kinky and the real career risks involved
30:39 Authenticity, privilege and living a fully expressed life
37:37 Growing up in Jackson, Mississippi
39:53 Sex education in religious private school
42:11 Why sex education needs to be ongoing and age appropriate
44:31 Abstinence education and the harm of ignoring sexuality
48:23 High school sex culture, late bloomers and learning from friends
50:23 Munches, kink community and finding people on the same journey
52:06 Losing a job, breakup and starting stand-up comedy
54:05 Building Kinky Comedy from a backyard show to a touring production
57:55 Community support and watching creative projects grow
59:58 Producing a show vs developing as a comedian
01:01:37 Comedy etiquette and why audiences shouldn't film comedians

Justin Herman is a television director and producer, internationally touring stand-up comedian, and co-creator of Kinky Comedy originally from Albany, New York where his formal sex education consisted of one awkward school lesson separating boys and girls, a confusing anatomical chart, and a diner conversation with his dad about "the birds and the bees" that definitely did NOT cover kink.

In this episode we talk about the lifestyle community, kink and non-monogamy, how Kinky Comedy accidentally became a hub for sexually liberated audiences, the anthropology of play parties, why lifestyle spaces tend to create deeper friendships, and what happens when kinky jokes collide with vanilla comedy crowds. We also get into porn magazines as early sex education, polyamory as emotional calculus, consent culture in BDSM communities, and the surprisingly wholesome reality of seeing your friends thrive in sexually open environments.

Then, Justin and I go deep reading Reddit stories over on Patreon!
https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck

Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 4p PT / 7p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck

___________________________________________

Where to find Justin:
Instagram: @justin_herman
Kinky Comedy: https://kinkycomedy.com
Website: https://justinhermancomedy.com

Where to find Arielle:
Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck
TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck

Bonus stories found exclusively on Patreon:

• STORY 1: Am I the asshole for wanting my girl to do more cleaning around the apartment?
• STORY 2: Am I the asshole for banning my sister's boyfriend from my house and closing the door in his face?

Like my cuffs? Me too! Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here:
https://lovecrave.com/arielle

_____________________________________________

Episode Cheat Sheet

02:05 What Kinky Comedy is and how it started
06:40 What "the lifestyle" actually means (kink, BDSM and non-monogamy)
09:10 Why women watching male-male porn often feel safer and more connected to the pleasure
11:15 Building community through sex-positive comedy shows
15:50 Why kinky jokes bomb in vanilla comedy rooms
18:20 XBIZ, adult industry spaces and sexual openness
20:40 Seeing your friends have sex and what it teaches about personality
23:00 The anthropology of play parties and lifestyle spaces
25:15 Why polyamory requires extreme emotional intelligence
27:30 Body positivity, vulvas and seeing real bodies in lifestyle spaces
29:35 Why naked confidence makes everyone hotter
31:50 Consent culture and why lifestyle spaces prioritize women's comfort
34:05 Negotiation vs coercion in kink and BDSM dynamics
36:00 The Orgy Dome at Burning Man and radical consent practices
38:10 Why people attend play parties without having sex
40:13 Justin's real sex education: awkward school lessons and the diner birds-and-bees talk
42:20 Porn magazines as early sex education for teenage boys
46:30 Why boys looking at porn together is its own weird cultural ritual
49:40 Punching down in comedy and evolving standards in humor
54:15 Why comedy should evolve as society evolves
56:30 The origin of the "real good sex guy" title
58:50 Growing Kinky Comedy into a real community event

Lotus Lain is an adult performer, producer, intimacy coordinator and sex worker advocate originally from California's Central Valley where growing up in a small town meant most of her real sex education came later through curiosity, the internet, and eventually working in the adult industry itself.

In this episode we talk about the unexpected overlap between porn and Hollywood, how the adult industry approached consent, boundaries and choreography long before mainstream film and television caught up, and why productions eventually realized they needed intimacy coordinators. We also get into mentorship in the adult industry, what actually happens on set when filming sex scenes, and why performers deserve experts guiding those moments.

Catch Lotus and I gettin' real reading Reddit stories over on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck

Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 4p PT / 7p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck

____________________________________________________

Where to find Lotus:
Instagram: @icy.lotus
TikTok: @icy.lotus

Where to find Arielle:
Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck
TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck

Organizations we support:

• Free Speech Coalition
• Sexual Wellness Professional Alliance

Bonus stories found exclusively on Patreon:

• STORY 1: My husband (37M) has been seeing other women and I (36F) don't know if I should give him another chance. What would you do?
• STORY 2: AIO? My daughter didn't listen to the teacher during a female emergency and is now receiving a referral

Like my cuffs? Me too! Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here:
https://lovecrave.com/arielle

___________________________________________________

Episode Cheat Sheet:

02:29 Growing up in California's Central Valley
04:28 Discovering the adult industry
06:36 Mentorship and "porn mom" lineage
08:45 Consent and boundaries on adult film sets
10:55 The logistics of filming sex scenes
13:18 Why Hollywood eventually needed intimacy coordinators
15:31 Differences between porn sets and traditional film sets
17:38 Choreographing realistic sex scenes
19:54 Why actors need experts guiding intimate scenes
22:15 Performer advocacy and safety on set
24:35 The rise of intimacy coordination in Hollywood
26:58 What film productions still get wrong about sex scenes
28:40 Why sex workers understand boundaries and consent
30:41 Supporting performers during vulnerable scenes
33:01 Changing the culture of filming intimacy