What happens when grief hits your relationship? Every single one of us will face it — but how you handle it as a couple can either bring you closer together or tear you apart.

In this episode, John and Nicole get brutally honest about navigating grief while in a relationship. From losing parents to watching your partner struggle, they break down the uncomfortable truths nobody talks about — including why your grief isn't a free pass to treat people badly, and why shutting your partner out actually hurts more than letting them in.

🎯 What We Cover:

• Why grief hits differently when you're in a relationship vs. single
• How to support your partner without forcing them to grieve "your way"
• The balance between giving space and being present
• What to do when your partner shuts down after a loss
• Processing slow loss (like a parent with Parkinson's) vs. sudden death
• Why refusing to share grief deprives your partner of the chance to show up for you
• Creating a "new normal" after loss

⏱️ Timestamps:

0:00 - Preview: Your parents are going to die
0:41 - Episode intro
1:17 - Today's topic: Grief in a relationship
2:18 - Personal experience with loss
3:20 - Balancing support without forcing conversation
5:45 - TV show parallel: His and Her on Netflix
7:15 - When grief leads to isolation
9:22 - Why does grief affect people so differently?
10:37 - Being there without smothering
13:34 - We're all going to experience loss
16:24 - Grieving divorce and a parent's Parkinson's
17:36 - Slow loss vs. sudden death
20:00 - Dealing with potential loss and mortality
25:10 - The importance of preemptive acceptance
30:00 - "Dead before they're dead" mentality
33:11 - Pre-grieving the inevitable
34:35 - Appreciating life and living for those we've lost
35:50 - Creating a "new normal"
38:39 - You owe your partner honest communication about grief
42:05 - Grief beyond death: grieving changes in yourself
45:03 - "It hurts more when you DON'T come to me"
48:05 - Accepting your new normal together
50:32 - Wrap up

📬 Connect With Us:

📧 betterthanperfectpodcast@gmail.com
🌐 betterthanperfectpod.com
📺 Watch on YouTube: youtube.com/@BetterThanPerfectPodcast

New episodes every Friday at 7am PST! 🔔

What do you do when your partner hurts you? Do you lash out? Shut down? Pretend it didn't happen? In this episode, John and Nicole dive deep into what happens when we get hurt in relationships—and why most of us handle it completely wrong.The truth is, you're probably extending your own suffering way longer than necessary. That initial hurt? It only lasts 60-90 seconds. Everything after that is what YOU add to it.In this episode:• Why taking things personally is destroying your peace• The difference between malice and ignorance (and why it matters)• How to process emotions instead of expressing OR suppressing them• Why doing hard things makes you emotionally bulletproof• The one question that instantly shifts your perspective in conflictPlus, a real example from our own relationship where John dropped the ball—and what we learned from it.Email us: betterthanperfectpodcast@gmail.comWebsite: betterthanperfectpod.com

Men aren’t keeping the peace with “happy wife, happy life”—they’re losing respect, attraction, and leadership. In this conversation we break down why people-pleasing your partner backfires, how to set loving boundaries, and what it looks like to disagree without yelling or yielding. Let her be upset if she’s upset—and still lead with love.In this episode you’ll learn • Why “happy wife, happy life” quietly ruins marriages • The difference between people-pleasing and servant leadership • How boundaries create emotional safety (for both of you) • The skill of saying hard things kindly—without walking on eggshells • How men can reset a yes-man dynamic without power games • How women can be influential without bulldozing respect • Practical scripts to hold frame, stay calm, and move forward togetherChapters00:00 Intro02:10 Why “happy wife, happy life” fails in the long run07:45 People-pleasing vs. leadership (what women actually feel)14:18 Let her be upset: holding frame without being cold20:33 Boundaries that build safety, not control27:05 Scripts: say the hard thing—kindly and clearly34:12 When you’ve been a yes-man: how to reset with respect42:50 How she gives counsel without killing his leadership50:11 United front, long-term trust, and real intimacy56:40 Takeaways and next stepsKey takeaways • Stop managing her mood; manage your frame. • Calm voice plus clear boundaries is love in action. • Short-term upset is often the price of long-term trust. • Choose influence over approval.Connect with usPodcast site: betterthanperfectpod.comEmail your questions: betterthanperfectpodcast@gmail.comIf this helped, tap Like, Subscribe, and Share with someone who needs stronger love and better boundaries.#BetterThanPerfect #MarriageAdvice #MasculineLeadership #Boundaries #PeoplePleaserRecovery #RelationshipTips #Communication #LoveAndRespect #CouplesPodcast