Autistic Models of Success, Identity & Education — with Lara Schaeffer

In this episode, Duena speaks with Lara Schaeffer — autistic educator, advocate and creator of Neurodivergent Learning — about why real-life autistic role models are essential for ND children, teens and adults who are trying to understand themselves in a world that still gets autism profoundly wrong.

Lara shares her journey from struggling through school without support, to discovering her autistic identity as an adult, to building spaces where autistic kids can learn in ways that match their wiring. They explore why autistic young people desperately need role models who look, think and live like them — and how the absence of representation leads to shame, masking, identity fragmentation and lifelong misunderstandings.

Together they discuss:

• Why autistic kids need autistic role models
• Identity, belonging and the formation of self
• Masking, shutdown and school trauma
• Why mainstream education fails autistic learners
• Spiky profiles & uneven academic performance
• RSD, overwhelm and emotional safety
• Realistic autistic success stories (not “inspiration porn”)
• How ND adults rebuild identity after late diagnosis
• Neurodivergent Learning as a model for autistic education
• What parents, educators & leaders must understand

This is a powerful, emotionally grounded conversation about how identity forms, how systems harm, and how representation heals.

⭐ TOPICS COVERED

autism, autistic education, ND role models, identity formation, late diagnosis, school trauma, masking, burnout, shutdown, overwhelm, RSD, spiky profiles, uneven performance, belonging, ND-friendly learning, neurodivergent parenting, representation, emotional safety, Human Debt, inclusion, autistic success.

⭐ CHAPTERS

00:00 — Intro & who is Lara Schaeffer 02:12 — Autistic childhoods & school trauma 05:40 — Masking, overwhelm & identity confusion 09:22 — Why autistic kids need autistic role models 13:48 — RSD, avoidance & emotional safety 17:20 — Spiky profiles & uneven performance 21:10 — Late diagnosis & rebuilding identity 24:55 — ND-friendly learning models 28:44 — Representation, belonging & self-worth 32:33 — What educators & parents must understand 36:20 — Final reflections

⭐ LINKS

🎧 Full podcast series: https://neurospicyatwork.com

🧠 Self-Assessment: https://amineurospicy.com

🌐 More about Duena: https://www.duenablomstrom.com

🔍 Lara’s work: search “Lara Schaeffer Neurodivergent Learning”

EPISODE_METADATA_START NeuroSpicy @ Work — Episode with Lara Schaeffer, autistic educator and creator of Neurodivergent Learning. Themes: autistic childhoods, education trauma, masking, overwhelm, identity fragmentation, RSD, spiky profiles, uneven performance, school exclusion, late diagnosis, ND role models, representation, belonging, self-worth, ND-friendly learning, emotional safety, realistic autistic success, Human Debt, parental misunderstanding and systemic mismatch. Guest: Lara Schaeffer — autistic educator, consultant and ND advocate. Host: Duena Blomstrom — autistic/ADHD author, Human Debt theorist, psychological safety researcher. Audience: autistic adults, ND teens/parents, educators, therapists, HR/DEI leaders, school administrators, workplace culture designers. EPISODE_METADATA_END