Ladies, it's time to embrace our mess! Because our mess has the most to offer us.

In our latest episode, Monique shares her transformative experience with a group of women who bravely confronted their struggles and emotions. Each woman, while successful in her own right, expressed feelings of falling short in various aspects of life—be it motherhood, relationships, or career. This candid discussion highlights a common theme: the burden of perfectionism and the unrealistic standards that high achieving women often impose on themselves.

Join in to find out how accepting your mess can give you real clarity and a better way to connect with who you really are.

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GEMS DROPPED

“I ​think ​this ​is ​the ​nature ​of ​high ​achievement, ​where ​we ​feel ​we're ​coming ​up ​short ​because ​the ​bar ​is ​way, ​way, ​way ​too ​high. ​And ​that, ​way, ​way, ​way, ​way ​too ​high ​bar ​serves ​us ​in ​many ​ways ​throughout ​our ​life. ​And ​so ​it's ​tricky ​when ​that ​same ​strength ​becomes ​your ​greatest ​weakness. Having ​an ​extremely ​high ​bar ​in ​life, ​​when ​you ​don't ​wield ​it ​with ​intention, ​with ​thoughtfulness, ​is a ​lot ​of ​suffering.”

“If ​you ​allow ​it, ​if ​you submit ​to ​yourself, ​​you ​get ​to ​find ​that ​the ​message ​​is ​not ​actually ​too ​much ​for ​anybody.“

“Many ​people ​won't ​take ​that ​step, ​won't ​move ​past ​that ​threshold, ​that ​marker ​of ​control, ​​that ​line ​of ​demarcation, ​because ​they ​believe ​if ​they ​start ​crying, ​ ​if ​they ​start ​raging, ​if ​they ​let ​the ​sadness ​out, ​the ​confusion ​out, ​that ​they'll ​never ​stop. ​That ​it ​feels ​so ​vast ​and ​so ​deep ​that ​no ​one ​can ​contain ​it. ​No ​one ​would ​be ​able ​to ​hold ​the ​space ​for ​it. ​And ​it ​feels ​unending. be. ​It's ​never ​as ​scary ​as ​you ​think ​it's going ​to ​be. ​And ​when ​you ​allow ​yourself ​to ​let ​some ​of ​that ​steam ​out ​of ​the ​pot, ​you ​allow ​yourself ​to ​be ​out ​loud ​in ​your ​mess, ​like ​you ​just ​kind ​of ​relinquish ​control, ​again ​in ​safe ​held ​space, ​that ​you ​get ​to ​meet ​the ​side ​of ​yourself ​that ​you've ​been ​dying ​to ​meet.”

“Our ​mess ​has ​the ​most ​to ​offer ​us, ​our ​mess ​has ​​the ​peace ​that ​we're ​craving, ​our ​mess ​has ​the ​creativity ​that ​we ​can't ​access, ​​our ​mess ​is ​where ​our ​compass ​lies ​in ​seasons ​of ​life, ​where ​we ​feel ​so ​lost.”

“Just ​because ​somebody ​is ​feeling ​fragile ​in ​a ​moment, ​somebody ​is ​breaking ​and ​cracking ​in ​a ​moment, ​doesn't ​mean ​that ​that ​is ​who ​they ​are. ​That ​fragility ​is ​something ​that ​we ​experience ​sometimes, ​that ​we ​move ​through, ​that ​we ​learn ​from, ​that ​we ​need ​to ​just ​be ​with. ​And ​then ​you ​find ​your ​way. ​We ​are ​all ​whole.”

“​It ​is ​a ​practice. It ​is ​a ​skill. ​It ​is ​a ​capacity ​to ​build ​within ​yourself. ​And ​it ​takes ​a ​lot ​of ​strength ​and ​willingness ​and ​just ​faith ​​that ​you ​can ​allow ​yourself ​to ​be ​seen ​by ​yourself ​and ​by ​others, ​to ​be ​witnessed ​as ​well, ​at ​your ​most ​honest, ​​at ​your ​most ​real ​and ​raw.”

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In this episode, Monique examines the struggle many women face when longing to reconnect with a former version of themselves. She addresses the common longing of wanting to "get back" to who they used to be, exploring the nuances of this desire in the context of new life chapters.

Through an insightful coaching conversation with a woman who feels lost after stepping back from her career to raise her child, Monique highlights the challenges of balancing motherhood with personal aspirations.

Tune in to hear the full conversation and gain practical steps to reignite your creativity and confidence while walking through your individual journey.

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GEMS DROPPED

“In ​retrospect, ​when ​you ​get ​to ​this ​stage ​of ​life ​and ​you ​have ​children ​and ​your ​priorities ​change, ​your ​rhythms ​change, you ​sometimes ​miss ​parts ​of ​yourself ​​that ​felt ​less ​​encumbered, ​that ​felt ​like ​you ​had ​less ​constraints.”

“You're ​never ​going ​​to ​be ​unencumbered ​the ​way ​that ​you ​were ​10, ​15, ​20 ​years ​ago. ​Wherever ​that ​version ​of ​you ​is ​that ​you're ​looking ​back ​to, ​she's ​not ​coming ​back. She's ​never ​going ​to ​come ​to the present ​day ​to ​rescue ​you ​from ​this, ​your ​current ​context ​and ​the ​current ​place ​that ​you ​feel ​stuck ​in.”

“​It's ​not ​that ​we ​necessarily ​have ​to ​resent ​where ​we're ​at ​today, ​but ​when ​we ​want ​to ​go ​forward ​and ​we ​don't ​feel ​like ​we ​have ​the ​tools ​that ​we ​need ​today, ​we'll ​reach ​backward ​to ​a ​version ​of ​ourselves ​that ​cannot ​help ​us ​in ​our ​new ​context. ​I ​do ​love ​connecting ​with ​former ​versions ​of ​ourselves ​in ​some ​instances, ​but ​she ​can't ​be ​the ​captain ​of ​this ​ship. ​You're ​the ​captain ​now. ​She ​was ​equipped ​for ​the ​season ​that ​she ​came ​through. ​She’s ​obviously ​laid ​some ​groundwork ​for ​you ​to ​be ​who ​you ​are ​today. ​​But ​we ​can't ​go ​back ​searching ​for ​that ​version ​of ​ourselves ​to ​fully ​direct ​where ​we're ​going ​next.”

“We cannot ​compare ​our ​capacity ​or ​our ​experience ​or ​our ​own ​energy ​to ​that ​of ​other ​people. We ​all ​have ​different ​boundaries ​and ​limitations ​and ​you ​should ​be ​assessing ​that ​on ​an ​individual ​basis. ​If ​you ​want ​to ​push ​through, it's ​an ​individual ​assessment and ​you ​understand ​how ​you ​want ​to ​define ​the ​bounds ​of ​limitation ​for ​yourself.”

“You ​can ​​at ​the ​end ​of ​the ​day, ​write ​down ​one ​thing ​that ​you ​found ​beautiful ​or ​inspiring ​or ​unique ​or ​curious. ​What's ​one ​little ​thing ​to ​begin ​to ​train ​your ​brain ​​to ​focus ​on ​a ​little ​bit ​more, ​to ​begin ​to ​grow ​that ​relationship, ​to ​begin ​to ​feel a connection to creativity ​again. ​It ​can ​be ​small. ​These ​things ​don't ​have ​to ​be ​grand. Oftentimes ​it ​is ​just ​these ​little ​small ​commitments, ​these ​very ​simple ​revelations ​that ​we ​just ​have ​to ​respond ​to ​that ​will ​make ​all ​the ​difference. ​It's ​those ​incremental ​things ​over ​time. That ​is ​how ​people ​win.”

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In today’s fast-paced world, the conversation about community matters more than ever, especially in a time when isolation is one of the biggest challenges many women are facing. In this episode, Monique breaks down the huge difference between simply being in a room with people and being in a space where someone can truly say, “I’m in the right place. This is where I belong.” She explores why so many women leave group programs, masterminds, and memberships feeling underwhelmed, not because the space was “bad,” but because it wasn’t curated with the depth, specificity, and psychological safety needed for real transformation.

Monique unpacks what aligned community actually means, why group size and curation matter, and how to stop settling for spaces that force women back into survival when they are seeking spaces that support thriving. Tune in for a deeper conversation on discernment, alignment, and how to find a space that truly supports growth, belonging, and becoming more of who you are.

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GEMS DROPPED

“There ​is ​a ​huge ​difference ​between ​finding ​community ​and being ​in ​a ​room ​where ​you ​can ​look ​to ​your ​left, ​you ​can ​look ​to ​your ​right ​and ​say, ​”I'm ​in ​the ​right ​place. ​This ​is ​where ​I ​belong. ​I'm ​so ​glad ​I'm ​here. This ​is ​making ​sense.”

“Aligned community has ​to ​be ​one ​of ​the ​most ​overused ​phrases ​and ​I ​think ​that ​we ​don't ​really ​know ​what ​alignment ​is ​and ​what ​it ​actually ​requires.”

“​Group ​size ​matters when ​you ​are ​trying ​to ​actually ​grow ​your ​network, when ​you ​are ​actually ​trying ​to ​grow ​yourself, ​not ​just ​up ​level ​your ​skills, ​but ​you ​are ​trying ​to ​see ​yourself ​evolve, ​move ​past ​a ​lot ​of ​those ​internal ​barriers, ​the ​things ​that ​are ​scaring ​you. ​Like ​the ​extremely ​vulnerable, ​interpersonal, ​internal ​work. ​So ​who's ​in ​the ​room ​and ​what ​connection ​you ​feel ​to ​those ​folks ​really ​matters.”

“You ​have ​to ​know ​what ​your ​goals ​are. ​If ​your ​goals ​are ​things ​like ​exposure ​or ​inspiration ​or ​like ​broad ​networking, ​larger ​rooms ​can ​work ​beautifully. ​But ​if ​your ​goal ​is ​actually ​identity ​transformation, ​​you ​want ​to ​become ​different. ​If ​your ​goal ​is ​depth ​and ​community, y​ou ​want ​to ​feel ​connected, ​begin ​to ​establish ​new ​bonds ​with ​people, size ​matters. ​ ​No ​one's ​going ​to ​tell ​you ​that. ​But ​I'm ​telling ​you ​that ​today.”

“​​High ​quality ​rooms ​create ​transferable ​insights.​That ​is ​the ​goal.”

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If you’ve been telling yourself you’re “just not disciplined enough,” this episode is your permission slip to stop weaponizing that story.

Because the truth is you’re trying to create from a body that’s depleted.

In this episode, Monique names what so many high-achieving women experience: you can hold a crystal-clear creative vision for years… and still shut down the moment you finally have time to work on it. Not because you’re lazy. Not because you don’t want it badly enough. But because pressure and creativity don’t thrive in the same conditions.

Tune in as Monique breaks down why execution can happen under adrenaline, urgency, and cortisol, but creation requires something else and offers a grounded shift that changes everything.

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GEMS DROPPED

“You ​don't ​actually ​lack ​discipline. ​You're ​just ​trying ​to ​create ​from ​a ​body ​that ​is ​truly, ​completely ​depleted.”

“​Rest ​is ​not ​a ​reward ​that ​you ​get ​after ​you ​create. ​It's ​the ​requirement ​before ​you ​do.”

“You ​can't ​solve ​for ​your ​dream ​from ​the ​same ​place ​you ​produce ​from ​for ​your ​job. ​​That ​place ​​is ​pressure. The kind ​of ​pressure ​that ​has ​depleted ​you.”

“There ​is ​a ​middle ​space between ​burnout, ​which ​we ​have ​to ​acknowledge. And ​what ​I ​think ​is ​in ​that ​middle ​space ​is ​restoration.“

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In this episode, Monique explores a moment so many high-achieving women experience. That moment an opportunity appears and you quietly start building a case for why you shouldn’t take it.

Using the launch of her new YouTube channel as a real-time example, Monique shares what it looks like to move forward without waiting to feel “ready.” She unpacks the familiar fears that often surface when visibility increases, such as What if it flops? What if people judge me? What if I’m not enough? and offers a grounded reframe.

For anyone sitting on a pivot, a transition, or a new chapter, Monique encourages you to shoot the shot, stop self-disqualifying and see what happens.

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GEMS DROPPED

“​Don't ​count ​yourself ​out ​before ​​you ​give ​it ​a ​shot.”

“We ​have ​this ​​very ​interesting ​relationship ​to ​our ​achievements ​as ​high ​achievers ​where ​it's ​like ​as ​soon ​as ​you ​achieve ​something, ​you ​write ​it ​off. ​It's ​just ​like, ​okay, ​on ​to ​the ​next.We ​have ​just ​been ​dismissing ​over ​and ​over ​and ​over ​again, ​not ​enoughing ​over ​and ​over ​and ​over ​again. ​Through ​every milestone, ​every ​point ​of ​new ​expansion, ​every ​big ​lesson ​learned, ​or every ​iInternal ​shift. These are huge ​things, but ​we ​discount ​​so ​much ​of ​it.”

“​I ​don't ​know ​what ​it ​is ​that ​you ​might ​be ​facing. What it is ​that ​you're ​hesitating ​to ​go ​for, ​to ​toss ​your ​hat ​in ​the ​ring ​for, ​to ​apply ​for, ​​to ​step ​into, ​a ​phone ​call ​that ​you ​have ​been ​holding ​off ​on ​making, ​there's ​a ​person ​that ​you ​want ​to ​mentor ​you, ​​someone ​that ​you ​want ​to ​connect ​with, ​anywhere ​you ​want ​to ​be. ​Shoot ​your ​shot. ​Shoot ​your ​shot.”

“Whatever ​the ​thing ​is ​that ​you ​are ​holding ​yourself ​back ​on, ​​with ​intention,​ shoot ​your ​shot. ​Stop ​counting ​yourself ​out ​and ​see ​what ​happens. ​​Know ​that ​you ​can ​cope ​and ​that ​you ​will ​grow. ​Guaranteed. ​In ​any ​case, ​you ​will ​grow. “

“​​We ​have ​to ​push ​ourselves ​into ​​new ​limits. ​And ​I ​think especially ​to take ​emotional ​risks. ​These ​are ​the ​things ​that ​make ​us ​feel ​very ​vulnerable. ​​Oftentimes ​we ​feel ​a ​lot ​more ​equipped ​to ​take professional ​risks, ​tactical ​risks, ​strategic ​risks. ​But we ​don't ​always ​want ​to ​take ​the ​emotional ​risk. And ​the ​emotional ​risk ​is ​​where ​it's ​at. ​That's ​where ​you're ​going ​to ​see ​yourself ​transform.”

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In ​this ​day ​and ​age ​when ​​there ​are ​a ​lot ​of ​things ​that ​want ​to ​stifle ​our ​dreams ​and ​stifle ​our ​energy ​and our ​creativity ​about ​what ​it ​is ​that ​we ​can ​build ​or ​do ​or ​how ​we ​can ​exist ​in ​the ​world, we need support with dreaming.

In this episode, Monique shares what came up during a recent dream session she led with her clients, and why making space for self-reflection and imaginative play is such a powerful (and necessary) practice. You’ll hear her unpack our relationship with dreaming and the ongoing work of becoming, not the version of yourself that gets approval, but the version that feels true. She also offers a gentle but clear shift: instead of chasing external validation, start paying attention to what you actually desire, because those internal cues are often the most honest fuel for your ambition.

If your dreams have been feeling distant, smaller, or harder to access lately, this conversation will help you reconnect. Tune in, explore what’s calling you forward, and take one small step toward reclaiming your dreams.

GEMS DROPPED

“​Dreaming ​can ​feel ​really ​tough, ​especially ​for ​women ​who ​are ​positioned ​to ​be ​the ​caretakers ​of ​this ​world ​in ​our ​communities, ​in ​our ​families, ​​in ​our ​offices, everywhere ​we ​go. ​And ​so we ​get ​wrapped ​up ​in ​what ​everybody ​else ​needs.”

“To ​have ​a ​relationship ​to ​the ​dream, ​which ​is ​like ​more ​of ​a ​destination ​positioning, ​as ​opposed ​to ​having ​a ​relationship ​to ​dreaming, ​which ​is ​the ​act ​​of ​creating, ​engaging ​with ​the ​dream. ​I ​think ​the ​line ​of ​delineation ​there ​is ​​one ​points ​to ​where ​am ​I ​supposed ​to ​go ​or ​and ​how ​am ​I ​supposed ​to ​go ​there. ​The ​other ​one ​points ​to ​who ​am ​I ​supposed ​to ​be and ​so ​that's ​the ​question ​​I'll ​pose ​to ​you, ​which is who ​it ​is ​that ​you're ​trying ​to ​be?”

“The ​dream ​is ​really ​just ​a ​byproduct ​or ​a ​symptom ​of ​​you ​being ​who ​you ​are ​meant ​to ​be ​​expressed ​as here and ​now, ​right? ​Are ​you ​behaving ​as ​her? ​Are ​you ​existing ​as ​her? ​Are ​you ​at ​the ​energetic ​frequency? It's ​just ​what ​happens.”

“Whether ​or ​not ​we ​know ​it, ​y', ​all, ​we ​have ​mantras ​running ​through ​our ​heads ​every ​day. ​Directing ​our ​beliefs, ​directing ​our ​actions, ​​all ​of ​our ​choices. You're ​already ​running ​off ​of ​a ​mantra, ​and ​it ​is ​your ​job ​to, as ​often ​as ​you ​can, ​examine ​what ​is ​the ​mantra ​that ​I'm ​living ​by ​right ​now. ​What ​is ​the ​track ​that ​is ​running ​through ​my ​mind ​that ​is ​directing ​my ​thoughts, ​my ​emotions, ​my ​behaviors, what's ​in ​there ​​and ​is ​it ​serving ​me? ​Because ​sometimes ​it ​is, ​and ​sometimes ​it ​isn't. ​Many ​times, ​especially ​in ​a ​season ​where ​you ​are ​triggered ​by ​fear ​and ​overwhelm, ​those ​kinds ​of ​things, they ​don't ​come ​from ​nowhere, ​and ​they ​don't ​have ​an ​impact. ​That's ​just ​external. ​It's ​like ​your ​mind ​is ​running ​on ​something. ​And ​so ​we’ve ​got ​to ​get ​a ​hold ​of ​our ​thoughts, ​and ​we ​have ​to ​replace ​our ​thoughts.”

“Your ​dream ​is ​about ​who ​you ​wish ​to ​be. How ​you ​wish ​to ​be ​expressed ​in ​the ​world. ​It's ​not ​about ​the ​destination ​or ​the ​accomplishments. ​It's ​about ​how ​you ​want ​to ​feel ​about ​yourself. ​​The ​kind ​of ​woman ​who ​is. The ​kind ​of ​woman ​who ​does. ​The ​kind ​of ​woman ​who ​exists. Are ​you ​willing ​to ​put ​her ​at ​risk ​to ​make ​other ​people ​feel ​better?”

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In this introspective episode, Monique shares her self-discovery journey and what it’s taught her about shifting her relationship with money and consumption.

You’ll hear how she’s approaching better money management through a low-buy challenge, plus the real lessons she’s carrying forward from past accountability efforts in other parts of her life.

This conversation is a reminder that financial wellness isn’t meant to be done alone. When we name what’s true, share the messy parts, and ask for support, we create a healthier, more fulfilling relationship with money. Tune in now.

GEMS DROPPED

“​I ​think ​that ​our ​relationship ​with ​money ​and ​finances ​is ​just ​like ​any ​other ​relationship ​in ​life ​where ​it ​is ​a ​continuous ​growth process, ​a ​continuous ​learning ​curve with ​reevaluation ​and ​reinvestment ​and ​retesting ​and ​retrying.” ​

“When ​we ​say ​we ​want ​something, ​then ​we ​don't ​do ​it, ​It's ​because ​you ​didn't ​commit. ​You ​didn't ​really ​want ​it. ​You ​wanted ​to ​want ​it, but your ​behaviors do ​not ​demonstrate ​that ​commitment.”

“One ​thing ​I ​know ​about ​myself ​is ​that ​if ​I ​have ​an ​accountability ​partner, ​an ​accountability ​group ​that's ​also ​serious, ​I ​am ​​golden. ​I ​am ​golden. ​I ​work ​out ​so ​many ​things ​in ​my ​life ​through ​relationships. It's ​a ​tool, ​​it's ​a leveraging ​piece ​that ​I ​use ​to ​help ​me ​meet ​my ​goals.”

STAY IN TOUCH

Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to ambition@moniquershields.com.

In today's fast-paced world, women often find themselves at a crossroads, grappling with their professional identities and the desire for personal growth.

In this candid conversation, Monique discusses the societal pressures that often keep women tethered to outdated identities and the necessity of forging authentic connections that foster growth and transformation. Her message serves as a reminder that change is possible, and with the right support, women can achieve their dreams and redefine success on their own terms.

Tune in to discover how to reclaim your worth, embrace your agency, and build meaningful relationships that support your growth.

GEMS DROPPED

“I ​do ​believe ​that ​we ​all ​should ​own ​something. ​​It ​does ​not ​matter ​if ​you ​work ​full ​time ​and ​you ​are ​a ​corporate ​baddie. ​You ​are ​busting ​down ​doors ​and ​climbing ​all ​the ​ladders… I ​do ​believe ​that ​we ​should ​all ​own ​something.”

“You ​need ​to ​actually ​take ​the ​reins ​of ​your ​own ​story ​and be ​able ​to ​not ​only ​build ​it, ​​but ​speak ​about ​it ​and ​move ​in ​it. To ​actually ​exist ​in ​this ​new ​identity.”

“Transformation ​is ​a ​choice, ​but ​it's ​also ​a ​result ​of ​relationships. ​You're ​not ​going ​to ​find ​transformation ​by ​reading ​a ​book. ​You're ​not. ​You ​might ​find ​a ​spark ​that ​leads ​you ​down ​a ​path ​towards ​​growth ​and ​development ​and ​transformation, but information ​is ​not ​transformation. ​Information ​in and ​of ​itself, ​does ​not ​mean ​that ​you ​have ​actually ​made ​meaning ​of ​it. ​And ​I ​know ​that ​as ​we ​endeavor ​to ​make ​big ​changes ​in ​our ​world ​and ​big ​changes ​in ​our ​life ​that ​if ​we ​continue ​to ​exist ​only ​in shallow ​spaces, ​then ​we ​are ​missing ​out on ​the ​transformation.”

“I ​know ​when ​I ​feel ​like ​I'm ​down ​in ​the ​dumps ​about ​something ​and I'm ​doing ​that ​thing ​where ​it's ​like, ​well, ​I ​just ​need ​to ​do ​better. ​I'm ​just ​not ​enough. ​I'm ​not ​doing ​enough ​of ​the ​things. I ​gotta ​push ​harder. ​I ​just ​need ​to ​pull ​myself ​up ​by ​my ​bootstraps. ​All ​that ​bs. ​We ​self ​isolate ​as ​well. ​It ​puts ​you ​in ​this ​sort ​of ​self ​fulfilling ​cycle ​of ​the ​thing ​that ​you ​need ​most, ​which ​is ​the ​degree ​of ​support ​that ​you ​are ​not ​getting ​from ​the ​outside ​through ​an ​aligned ​community. ​When ​you ​don't ​do ​it, ​it ​just ​leads ​you ​to ​further ​and ​further ​self ​isolation ​and ​shame.”

“Depth [in relationships] ​is ​about ​alignment ​and ​a ​mutual ​willingness ​to ​continuously ​reach ​for ​realignment ​and ​overlap ​and ​ways ​in ​which ​to ​know ​each ​other ​more ​and ​to ​create ​more ​and ​more ​permission ​to ​know ​each ​other.”

"When you've ​got ​the ​passion, ​​the ​ideas, ​the ​access ​and ​the ​networks, ​but ​you ​still ​won't ​move. ​ ​That's ​your ​signal. ​It's ​not ​you. ​There's ​nothing ​else ​that ​you're ​lacking…​​Stop ​blaming ​yourself. … ​There ​is ​something ​about ​your ​environment, ​your ​community, ​the ​systems ​that ​exist ​around ​you, ​or ​don't ​exist ​around ​you. ​That ​is ​what ​is ​lacking. ​And ​so you ​have ​to ​solve ​for ​those ​things ​with ​the ​resources ​that you ​have.”

“​’I’ve ​shouted ​from ​the ​rooftops ​that ​this ​is ​how ​we ​have ​to ​move ​in ​the ​society ​that ​exists ​around ​us. ​This ​is ​how ​we ​have ​to ​move. ​You ​cannot ​be ​passive ​with ​this. ​You ​cannot ​be ​wishing ​upon ​a ​star ​and ​hoping. ​This ​is ​not ​a ​time ​for ​just ​being ​hopeful. ​You ​gotta ​take ​action ​and ​use ​what ​you ​have ​to ​get ​what ​you ​want.”

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