#196 Trusting our future selves to be resourceful with Dr Jan Eppingstall

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticketSubscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribePodcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ This episode, I’m joined by Dr Jan Eppingstall to talk about why so many of us who hoard struggle to trust our future selves to cope without keeping everything “just in case.” We get into how doubts about our own resourcefulness and fears about scarcity keep us stuck, and share practical ways to build confidence in our ability to handle whatever comes next. If you’ve ever worried you won’t manage without every single spare part or backup item, this conversation’s for you. Trusting Our Future Selves to Be ResourcefulThe psychological struggle of believing in one’s ability to cope without keeping everythingPersonal anecdotes from the host about surprise resourcefulnessExploration of cognitive distortions surrounding trust in future adaptabilityResourcefulness in Hoarding BehaviourContradiction: Resourceful justifications for keeping items vs. fear of not being resourceful if they’re discardedThe role of loss aversion and catastrophic scarcity thinkingImagining multiple uses for broken items versus inability to visualise coping without themThe ‘Just in Case’ MythReading and analysis of Ru Kotryna’s Instagram post on ‘just in case’ keepingDiscussion of how this reflects distrust in future selfEmotional impacts: fear of change, sufficiency, and facing the future without backupHow Distrust in Future Selves Manifests in Hoarding‘Insurance hoarding’ and duplicate/back-up keepingInformation hoarding for fear of forgetting needed detailsEmotional insecurity and sense of powerlessnessHost’s personal examples (nature as a self-soothing tool and fear of its impermanence)Navigating Ephemerality and ChangeConversation about the fleeting nature of things and the difficulty in accepting impermanenceReflection on attempts to freeze time by hoardingBehaviours and Thoughts Stemming from Lack of Self-TrustExecutive function issues (planning, organisation, working memory)Trauma and past experiences of genuine scarcityShame and immediate anxiety-reduction through keepingAvoidance and ‘comfort objects’ as safety strategiesPsychological Mechanisms Behind ‘I Don’t Trust Future Me’Discontinuity between current and future selfImpact of ADHD and perimenopause on executive functioning and time perceptionCognitive gaps between imagining needs and recalling/locating stored thingsIrony of ‘preparedness’ leading to greater unpreparednessBuilding Trust in Future ResourcefulnessThe value of journalling resourceful momentsSmall experiments: let go of duplicates and record how needs are met afterwardReviewing past examples of having coped or improvised successfullyConsumerism and the Illusion of SolutionsAttraction to gadgets and solutions for perceived problemsThe sunk cost fallacy and struggles to let goOwning up to aspirational or impulse purchases and being flexible in letting go if they don't workScarcity Thinking and Its Long-Term EffectsPersonal stories of genuine scarcity and the enduring fear it createsHow fear of not having enough directs attention to objects as solutions, rather than inner resourcefulnessDifficulty breaking the object-focused habit even after circumstances changeBreaking the Pattern: Psychological Approaches in TherapyBuilding evidence of existing skills and resourcefulnessAddressing deeper self-worth issues and messages from childhoodThe importance of social connections, seeking help, and curiosityThe Power and Pitfall of Backup SystemsPossessions as emotional and practical backupDrawback: Items often become inaccessible or forgottenThe paradox of keeping as “preparation” that often fails in practice due to volume and executive dysfunctionStrengthening Connection with Future SelfUsing ACT techniques and self-compassionTreating your future self like a friend and planning for their needsInternal monologues about preparing spaces and making life easier for future-youAlternative Pathways to Security and PreparednessCommunity and social resource sharing (borrowing, lending among friends/family)Developing adaptability, self-confidence, and skills rather than accumulating more itemsExperimenting with minimalism and embracing uncertaintyActionable Steps for Building Trust in ResourcefulnessSaying “I’ll figure it out when I need to”Experimenting with running out of non-critical suppliesDocumenting and reflecting on resourceful problem-solvingLetting go of low-risk items and noticing outcomesThe reminder that listeners have survived all past problems resourcefullyEncouragement to recognise and trust personal growth and capabilitiesEmphasis on learning, adaptability, and present-focused living Links The Ru Kotryna Instagram post that inspired this episodePodcast ep 183: ADHD, executive dysfunction and ...