#174: Shame vs Guilt (and Why it Even Matters)

If you’ve ever bent a decision around “not wanting to feel guilty,” this one’s for you.

Today we separate guilt (outward, action/outcome-focused: “I did something wrong”) from shame (inward, identity-focused: “I am wrong”).

Which matters because when you can spot authentic emotions that help you repair or realign—you can drop the inauthentic, habitual stuff that only fuels people-pleasing, FOPO, and misaligned decisions.

Here’s where we go:

• The fast distinction: Guilt vs. Shame
• What’s usually going on when we feel “guilty” for a choice (hint: you’re probably shaming yourself)
• How authentic emotions guide useful repair vs. how shame paralyzes
• Questions to sort authentic vs. inauthentic shame/guilt (and act accordingly)
• A boundary example from real life

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