Rasputin's Supernatural Dating Service

Monsters, ghosts, dead, undead, and Frankensteins still unsure if they're depressed because they're abominations against existence or if it's just been forever since they've been laid, all can find love with Rasputin's Supernatural Dating Service! Eli Kowalski has seen his share of freaks as a Certifier for Rasputin's Supernatural Dating Service. It's his job to weed out the real monsters from the weirdos with too much black lipstick. While on a routine certification, he comes across the Tablet of Nicaea. A powerful witch and self-proclaimed -Men's Rights Activist- wants to steal the tablet and use it to kill all supernatural creatures so that -nice guys- like him can have a better chance with women. Eli must unite with the supernatural policing agency, the witch's ex-girlfriend, and the constantly-naked Rasputin to save supernatural creatures in the name of love. He'll probably excuse himself from Rasputin's victory orgy, though.