Queen Bees and Wannabes

Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence

De: Rosalind Wiseman

Narrado por: Lee Adams

“My daughter used to be so wonderful. Now I can barely stand her and she won’t tell me anything. How can I find out what’s going on?”

“There’s a clique in my daughter’s grade that’s making her life miserable. She doesn’t want to go to school anymore. Her own supposed friends are turning on her, and she’s too afraid to do anything. What can I do?”

Welcome to the wonderful world of your daughter’s adolescence. A world in which she comes to school one day to find that her friends have suddenly decided that she no longer belongs. Or she’s teased mercilessly for wearing the wrong outfit or having the wrong friend. Or branded with a reputation she can’t shake. Or pressured into conforming so she won’t be kicked out of the group. For better or worse, your daughter’s friendships are the key to enduring adolescence—as well as the biggest threat to her well-being.

In her groundbreaking book, Queen Bees and Wannabes, Empower cofounder Rosalind Wiseman takes you inside the secret world of girls’ friendships. Wiseman has spent more than a decade listening to thousands of girls talk about the powerful role cliques play in shaping what they wear and say, how they respond to boys, and how they feel about themselves. In this candid, insightful book, she dissects each role in the clique: Queen Bees, Wannabes, Messengers, Bankers, Targets, Torn Bystanders, and more. She discusses girls’ power plays, from birthday invitations to cafeteria seating arrangements and illicit parties. She takes readers into “Girl World” to analyze teasing, gossip, and reputations; beauty and fashion; alcohol and drugs; boys and sex; and more, and how cliques play a role in every situation.

Each chapter includes “Check Your Baggage” sections to help you identify how your own background and biases affect how you see your daughter. “What You Can Do to Help” sections offer extensive sample scripts, bulleted lists, and other easy-to-use advice to get you inside your daughter’s world and help you
help her.

It’s not just about helping your daughter make it alive out of junior high. This book will help you understand how your daughter’s relationship with friends and cliques sets the stage for other intimate relationships as she grows and guides her when she has tougher choices to make about intimacy, drinking and drugs, and other hazards. With its revealing look into the secret world of teenage girls and cliques, enlivened with the voices of dozens of girls and a much-needed sense of humor, Queen Bees and Wannabes will equip you with all the tools you need to build the right foundation to help your daughter make smarter choices and empower her during this baffling, tumultuous time of life.

Reseñas de la Crítica

“Wise, humorous, life-affirming advice for parents that is utterly respectful of girls. I recommend parents mark it up, turn the corners of pages, and heed Wiseman’s creative and practical strategies for guiding girls along the sometimes treacherous pathways of growing up today. Queen Bees and Wannabes is Mapquest for parents of girls, from fifth grade all the way to young adulthood.”—Patricia Hersch, author of A Tribe Apart: A Journey into the Heart of American Adolescence

“Who’s in? Who’s out? Who’s cool? Who’s not? Why is one girl elevated to royal status and another shunned? Queen Bees and Wannabes answers these unfathomable questions and so many more. Wiseman gives parents the insight, compassion, and skill needed to guide girls through the rocky terrain of the adolescent social world. This is such an honest and helpful book; we recommend it highly.” —Nina Shandler, author of Ophelia’s Mom and Sara Shandler, author of the bestselling Ophelia Speaks

“Laced with humor, insight, and practical suggestions, Queen Bees and Wannabes is the one volume that’s been missing from the growing shelf of girl-centered publications. Wiseman explains the inner workings of teen culture and teaches parents, educators, and peers how to respond.”—Whitney Ransome and Meg Miln Moulton, executive directors, National Coalition of Girls’ Schools

“Wiseman cuts through wishful parental thinking with a wonderful mixture of humor, facts, girls’ voices, and a healthy dollop of reality. No, the harm cliques cause is not a natural fact of life. Wiseman gives us both hope and strategies to help our girls (and boys) build a more healthy, nurturing world for themselves.”—Joe Kelly, author, Dads and Daughters: How to Inspire, Understand and Support Your Daughter When She's Growing Up So Fast, executive director, Dads and Daughters

“Rosalind Wiseman invites us into the “Girl World” with insight, honesty, and humor. Based on the most thorough, helpful research I know of, this book should be required reading for parents, teachers, and health professionals.” —Edes P. Gilbert, acting president, Independent Educational Services

Good but dated

I really enjoyed it but would love an updated modern version. Some of the issues teens are facing today are vastly different than they were in 2002

Audio Book is 2002 edition

Would you try another book from Rosalind Wiseman and/or Lee Adams?

Yes

Any additional comments?

This book was an older edition. I needed it for a class I was taking. The one I purchased was the newer edition and the updated chapters were not in the audible version.

Good but a bit dramatic

I have the impression that this books perspective is all girls are perpetually sexual victims. Not that that isn't a problem, it most certainly is and I appreciate the authors perspective. most people i know didn't experience such drama or trauma.

Quality info though clearly a bit dated

Solid information from a reliable source. Read a bit slowly and very long so needed to speed it up to get through it. I stopped to take notes several times.

Ecelente

I wish I have read this book a long time ago. I must read for parents.

Outdated but still applicable

I will probably have to buy the 3rd edition of this book (this one is the version published in 2002 - the year I graduated from high school!) and while a lot has changed about social dynamics (to put it mildly) I do see how the topics discussed still play out.

I'm glad I listened to the audio book because I don't have a lot of time to sit and read books cover to cover, and now if I get my hands on a physical copy of the new version, I can easily find the sections I need at any given time.

Must read for anyone dealing with Girls

As a parent of an up and coming tween and someone who works with 15 and 16 year old girls this book was eye opening and spot on!

The closest thing to a parenting manual!

We as parents need the bare truth. What to expect, what we need to understand, what we can do to help our children through it. To raise healthy, strong, brave
young adults. Give them what our parents couldn't.

A Universal Must-Read

This book was written with mother's, of adolescent girls, & adolescent girls in mind. The information, however, presented in this book, puts experience of anyone who has experienced adolescence & US High school, into context. This is an insightful book for women & girls, but also men & boys. Wiseman's tome would improve anyone's understanding of the chaotic time known as adolescence.

Excellent guide to navigating life with your teenage girl

I found the descriptions of the queen bees and all the other positions very interesting and easy to recognize. The only problem with listening to a book is not being able to go back and understand the terminology. I may have to get this in print so I can look up the useful conversation starters and things to say and not say to your daughter.