Penises and Eye Contact…

...It's Just One of the Bare Necessities of Naked Life!

Ever wondered what to do when someone won’t stop staring at your knees while you’re naked? Or how to keep a straight face when every penis in the sauna suddenly salutes?

Welcome to the world of Kristin, a suburban Seattle nudist who has seen it all, laughed at most of it, and is still trying to figure out why men think “not staring” means drilling their gaze into her kneecaps.

This isn’t a guide to enlightenment. It’s a field manual for surviving the absurd realities of nudist life:

• The delicate science of eye contact when everyone’s junk is out.

• Why penises are weird, but boobs are weirder.

• The unspoken etiquette of erections (spoiler: cold water is your friend).

• How to laugh your way through nudity without being the creepy one.

Kristin blends personal misadventures, suburban sass, and blunt practical advice into a book that’s equal parts comedy, confession, and crash course in being comfortable in your own (naked) skin.

Whether you’re a curious first-timer, a seasoned nudist, or just someone who loves inappropriate honesty, Penises and Eye Contact will make you laugh, cringe, and nod knowingly...even if you keep your pants on.

Perfect for fans of oversharing, body humor, and wondering why the knees are getting all the attention.