
How to dance more in milongas
For argentine tango followers
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A couple of years ago, a woman approached me. She'd been into tango for quite some time, invested a lot in classes, events, and tango travel. She frequented milongas, and her experiences were a mixed bag - sometimes great, other times downright frustrating.
"I can't figure out why nobody asks me to dance. Do you have any insights? Don't worry, you can be straight with me. I'm just tired of this," she confided.
I responded to her question, but honestly, it was more of an educated guess. Over the next few years, I mulled over that answer, and it left me with a lingering feeling that something crucial was missing. The same issue cropped up repeatedly in my conversations with others.
It wasn't long before I realized that, like me, most people were operating on assumptions—assumptions that seemed entirely logical and self-evident:
"Men just want to dance with the young and beautiful."
"He's not dancing with me because I'm a beginner."
"Those folks over there? They think they're the tango superstars; they're just here to show off."
However, my mind tends to work a little differently. I have a penchant for challenging my own assumptions, for putting them to the test to see if they hold water.
So, I made a decision to approach this topic with fresh eyes, like a beginner. I embarked on a mission to ask over 16,000 social tango dancers why they choose to dance with some people, why they avoid dancing with others, and what steps they take to dance more.
The results surprised me, challenging my assumptions.
About me
My goal is to remove as many obstacles as possible that hinder the enjoyment and development of social tango dancers. However, I don't do it alone. I collaborate with thousands of subscribers of TheCuriousTanguero.com newsletter. Together, we identify the challenges faced by tango communities and work on finding solutions to make our tango lives a little better. I am the author of the book 'Tangofulness: Exploring Connection, Awareness, and Meaning in Tango,' and the editor of 'Tango Tips by the Maestros.'"
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