Counting on Death

A Marine Infantryman's Journey from the Front Lines of Combat to the Fight for Peace

De: Joshua Shores

Narrado por: Dan Bittner

Joshua Shores was just nineteen years old when he deployed to Iraq in 2005. A Midwestern kid raised in a close-knit, supportive family, he had developed a strong sense of duty and honor.

Both sides of his family had proudly served their country, fostering a legacy of service that would guide his own path. Serving in Alpha Company, 1st Battalion, 5th Marine Regiment, Shores was a teenager among battle-hardened peers, far removed from the naïve assumptions of war that he had once held.

Based on meticulous notes taken throughout his deployment, this vivid account follows his experiences as he navigated the brutal realities of war. Shores’ grueling seven-month deployment was marked by day-to-day struggles and nightmarish events. Driven by a desire to redeem himself and reconcile the harrowing experiences of his first deployment, Shores chose to return to combat a second time, this time to Afghanistan with the first-ever Marine Special Operations Company Bravo. But upon returning home, he faced new and equally daunting battles—struggling with survivor’s guilt and a profound sense of being misunderstood by those who had once known him.

Illuminating both the triumphs and failures he encountered on the front lines, his memoir offers a deeply personal perspective on the true cost of combat, providing a modern-day perspective on the psychological and emotional impacts of battle. This is the harrowing story of a teenager’s descent into the darkest parts of the soul and his arduous quest for redemption and self-discovery, capturing the relentless emotional toll of war even after the physical battles end.

Counting on Death serves as both a guide for new warfighters and a candid exploration of a veteran’s battle to find peace after service.

©2025 Joshua Shores (P)2025 Blackstone Publishing

Powerful

Well done Josh. Well done. This was an amazing memoir. I couldn’t stop listening - finished in one session.

Honest and Raw!

This was a great listen - both the story and the narrator were captivating. There are no rose colored glasses used when the author recounts his experience in the Marines, and he is not afraid to share the negative choices and consequences that followed. It was a privilege to hear this unfiltered version of events and follow along the highs and lows. I feel like I have a better understanding of what veterans have endured and will forever have to endure after their experience if they are lucky enough to come home.

Raw view of combat in Ramadi Iraq 2005

Listening to this book brought back so many emotions and memories. I laughed, I cried, I hurt and in the end I feel a sense of healing because this book helps share the bond of truth in combat that we Marines live with. Semper Fi
Make Peace or Die

An incredibly honest memoir

As someone who has worked in the mental health field for many years, but who has not had personal experience in the military, I am incredibly grateful for this honest story of the Author’s experience throughout deployment and returning home.

Exceptionally written memoir

This Marine has bared his soul sharing his memoir and how war has changed his life. The good and the bad. So emotional. A must read!

Great First Person Account of Combat and Growth.

This book is absolutely worth the read—or listen. Its first-person perspective and vivid detail bring the story to life in a way that feels deeply personal and real. The writing is compelling, and the narrator does an outstanding job drawing you in; I found it hard to stop listening.

Having spent time in Ramadi myself, I can say that the author’s portrayal of events, combat, brotherhood, anxiety, and the lasting effects on those involved is both accurate and profound. It’s a raw and honest reflection of the human experience in war.