Clavicular

Clavicular. The James Joyce of incel forums. The icarus of looksmaxxing. The Truman Burbank of Kick. The sleep paralysis bouncer of every fifteen year old’s dreams. The sex symbol of 2026? Welcome back to another season of sex on the internet, where Hannah and Maia issue a formal apology for being the nth cultural critics to try a definitive take on the least compelling man of the hour. Clavicular became a media darling after singing Kanye’s “Heil Htler” at the club, intentionally hitting a man with his cybertruck, yelling the n word into restaurants, and doing the rounds at NYFF. But what he really wants to be known for are his extreme beauty practices, so gender affirming in nature he may have closed the circle on misogyny - the walking answer to: “fellas, is it gay to f*ck a woman?” As Clavicular ascends into his desired state as a hard bodied Chad but nihilistically neuters himself in the process, has he finally realized Benedict’s thesis: everyone is beautiful, and no one is horny? Tangents include: Lindy West and the polycule from hell, and SNL as the Vegas residency of comedy.

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