Using IFS To Lead Your Family With Clarity

There is an Internal Civil War that rages in us. We think we are one single, consistent person, but in reality, we are a complex system of 'Parts.' We have the Protector, the Provider, the Achiever, and the Wounded Child—and often, they are all fighting for the steering wheel of our lives.For the Sentinel, true leadership doesn't start with commanding others; it starts with commanding yourself. If you are 'blended' with your anger or your anxiety, you aren't leading—you’re reacting. To be a Durable Dad, you have to do the inner work to move from being 'Part-led' to being 'Self-led. And I’ve brought the perfect guest joining us remotely to guide us in the right direction to starting that inner work.In this episode we are joined by Kurt Bush, the founder of Brimstone Coaching Group. Kurt is an expert in Internal Family Systems (IFS), a powerful modality that helps men map their internal landscape. He’s here to show us how to negotiate with our internal 'Protectors' so we can show up as our best, most integrated selves at home and in the boardroom.To learn more about Brimstone Coaching Group or get started, visit: https://www.brimstonecoachinggroup.com/To be a guest on The Fatherhood Challenge visit: https://podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/thefatherhoodchallengeCreate your podcast today! #madeonzencastrhttps://zencastr.com/?via=thefatherhoodchallenge00:05.34Jonathan GuerreroMost men live without a so a constant, a most limb yeah most men live with a constant quiet friction. You want to be in the patient, present father when you walk through the door. But a part of you is still revving up from the office, ready to bark at the first sign of chaos. You want to lead with confidence. But another part of you, the inner critic, is constantly whispering that you aren't doing enough.00:32.76Jonathan Guerrerothat you are failing and falling short or that you're just one mistake away from it all falling apart. This is the internal civil war. We think we are we are one single consistent person, but in reality, we are a complex system of parts.00:49.82Jonathan GuerreroWe have the protector, the provider, the achiever, and the wounded child. And often they're all fighting and steering, but they're all fighting for the steering wheel of our lives. For the Sentinel, true leadership doesn't start with commanding others. It starts with communicating yourself. If you are blended with your anger or your anxiety, you aren't leading, you are reacting.01:13.81Jonathan GuerreroTo be a durable dad, you have to do the inner work to move from being part-led being self-led. And I've brought the perfect guest who will join us remotely and guide us in the right direction to starting that inner work, all in just a moment, so don't go anywhere.02:12.57Jonathan GuerreroGreetings everyone, thank you so much for joining me then this episode called Using IFS Lead Your Family with Clarity. Today, we are joined by Kurt Busch, the founder of Brimstone Coaching Group.02:26.35Jonathan GuerreroKurt is an expert in internal family systems or IFS, which is a powerful modality that helps men map their internal land space. He's here to show us how to navigate our internal protectors so that we can show up as our best, most integrated selves at home and in the boardroom. Kurt, welcome to the Fatherhood Challenge.02:46.04Kurt BushHey, Jonathan, thanks for having me Really glad to be here.02:49.75Jonathan GuerreroOkay, here's my favorite question, Kurt. What's your favorite dad joke?02:53.66Kurt Bushah Jonathan, i I'm ready for this one. Uh, let me, let me take a deep breath and like getting character for a second. Uh, so the other day, John, I was, I was at the grocery store.03:04.44Kurt BushUh, you know, I bought, I bought all the things I needed and I put my milk up on the, on the conveyor and the cashier said, sir, would you like your milk in a bag?03:15.00Kurt BushAnd I looked at her and I said, no, the carton will be just fine.03:24.36Kurt Bushthat's That's my favorite dad joke, actually.03:27.97Jonathan GuerreroI like it.03:30.36Kurt BushThanks. Thanks.03:31.38Jonathan GuerreroIt's original. It's original to me at least.03:33.62Kurt BushThanks. Yeah.03:35.35Jonathan Guerrerookay03:35.64Kurt BushYeah.03:37.46Jonathan GuerreroAll right. Well, thank you for sharing that.03:39.80Kurt BushYeah, of course.03:41.91Jonathan GuerreroOkay. so So you do IFS work, which is dealing with parts. Most therapists don't go there. How in the world did you get interested in this? What's your story, your background?03:56.12Kurt BushYeah, that's a really good question. Thanks for asking it. And I always like to say to I'm not a therapist. i'm I'm a coach that is, that has some certification that has some training in IFS.04:07.96Kurt BushAnd you know, I like to use the line. I'm not just ah ah not just the president. I'm a member. However, that goat, the old hair club for men kind of thing. I'm not, I'm not just the user, but, but I also use it in my own ...