Let George Do It - The Marauder

George receives a letter that reads "Dear Mr. Valentine, my name is Ralph Saxon. I'm a writer, a very foolish writer, because like all of my breed, I've had a lifelong desire to spend a winter in the woods, to get away from the tensions and fears and neuroses of the city, to live simply with simple normal people. Well, here I am, a tiny deserted resort in the Lobo Range, and of course, it's all an illusion. I'm surrounded by more tension and fear than I ever knew before. And a friend of mine, the owner of the place, Hans Bjorkman, has become neurotic to the point of insanity, to the point where I can't control him, to the point where all he thinks of is the Marauder, the invader, the pirate and cutthroat of the animal kingdom. Mr. Valentine, this man is obsessed by the idea of murdering a mountain lion." George and Brooksie attempt to travel to the winter resort in George's car, but the roads are covered in ice, and they get stuck about five miles from their destination, so they have to walk the rest of the way in blizzard conditions. Finally arriving, they see a man on the front porch of the lodge. Brooksie says "If we can only get out of this wind". The man says "I got a big fire in the fireplace. Where'd you leave your car? George says "About five miles back, that hill beyond the Aspen Grove". Brooksie says "Yeah, the road was like glass. It was frozen practically solid". The man says "Here, we go. The front door is around this porch. I don't think your friend Saxon's back yet, been out communicating with nature. He's crazy like an Eskimo". George says "Hey, is your name Hans Bjorkman?" The man says "Me? Heck no. He's crazy too. Everybody is except me. I'm just peculiar. Everyone calls me Pinochle. Here, better wipe your feet". Suddenly, they hear something that sounds like a woman screaming in the distance! Brooksie says "Listen, George, it's a woman! Something's the matter with her!" Pinochle says "What's it sound like to you, city boy?" George says "Well, it doesn't sound like a baby crying. What was it? Cat?" Pinochle says "Yep, that's it. Cat, Puma, Cougar, Panther, Nuisance. Take your pick".