204. Are you ready for the conversations kids are already having?

When a child says, “This is who I am,” what does a supportive parent do next?

In this episode of Parents of the Year, Andrew and Caroline take on a topic many families are trying to understand with more care and less fear: gender identity, sexual orientation, pronouns, transition, and the language kids and teens may be using right now.

This conversation starts the way real parenting conversations often do — with jokes, peanut butter confessions, hummingbirds, and everyday life — then moves into something many parents are quietly wrestling with: how to respond when a child, teen, friend, teacher, or family member shares something personal about who they are.

Caroline walks through key terms like cisgender, transgender, gender identity, gender expression, agender, bisexual, pansexual, Two-Spirit, transition, and more, using a resource called the Gender Unicorn and materials from Trans Student Educational Resources. Andrew brings the parent lens many listeners will relate to: wanting to be respectful, wanting to understand, and wanting to get it right without pretending to know everything.

This episode is a reminder that kids do not need a perfect speech from us. They need openness. They need respect. They need adults who can pause, stay curious, and listen without shutting them down.

If you’ve been trying to support a child or teen through questions around identity, or you want better language for conversations at home, this episode will help you start.

In this episode:

• the difference between gender identity, gender expression, and sexual orientation
• why validation matters so much for kids and teens
• how parents can respond with curiosity instead of panic
• why respect matters even when a parent is still learning
• resources that can help families keep the conversation going

Homework activities for adults

1. Practise the pause

When your child says something surprising, don’t rush to correct, debate, or explain. Take a breath and answer with calm interest.

Try saying:

• “Thanks for telling me.”
• “I want to understand.”
• “Tell me more about that.”
• “What would feel supportive from me right now?”

Resource needed:
A short list of go-to response lines saved in your phone or written on a note in the kitchen.

2. Learn the basic language

Pick 10 terms from this episode and learn what they mean. Not to sound polished. Just to be less reactive and more informed.

Start with:
gender identity, gender expression, sex assigned at birth, cisgender, transgender, transition, agender, bisexual, pansexual, Two-Spirit

Resource needed:

• Gender Unicorn
• Trans Student Educational Resources (TSER) glossary or terminology page

3. Ask your child what respect looks like to them

Not every child wants the same kind of support. Some want privacy. Some want language to help them talk. Some want you to use a different name or pronouns. Some just want you not to panic.

Try asking:

• “What would help you feel supported by me?”
• “Is there anything you want me to say differently?”
• “Who knows, and who would

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