Healthy Anger, Healthy Body - with Dr. Gabor Maté

When does being “nice” start hurting your health? We explore the surprising science that links suppressed emotions—especially healthy anger and buried grief—to immune function, inflammation, and long-term disease risk. Drawing on affective neuroscience, we break down the core mammalian systems wired for rage, fear, panic and grief, care, seeking, and play, and explain why these circuits exist to protect boundaries and connection, not to create chaos.

Gabor Maté's website: https://drgabormate.com/

I share how anger operates as a boundary-setting signal that says something vital: this is not okay. When that signal gets muted to keep relationships intact, the immune system can mirror the shutdown. You’ll hear clear, practical language for telling the difference between healthy and unhealthy anger, plus simple steps to honor your limits without escalating conflict—naming the feeling, identifying the crossed boundary, and choosing proportionate action. We also unpack how childhood survival strategies, like staying quiet to preserve attachment, can turn into adult patterns of chronic niceness, migraines, flares, and burnout.

We look at striking research: longer survival among people with ALS who expressed anger, and a large study of women showing higher mortality when marital unhappiness stayed unspoken. The takeaway is not to explode; it’s to listen to the body’s early alarms and speak plain truths before stress hardens into illness. If you’ve ever wondered why “the good die young,” this conversation reframes goodness as self-respect, not self-erasure.

If this resonated, follow the show, share it with someone who needs better boundaries, and leave a quick review so more listeners can find these tools. Your story matters—what boundary will you protect today?

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