A Hard Silence

One Daughter Remaps Family, Grief, and Faith When HIV/AIDS Changes It All

De: Melanie Brooks

Narrado por: Melanie Brooks

In the mid 1980s, Canada's worst public health disaster was unfolding. Catastrophic mismanagement of the country's blood supply allowed contaminated blood to be knowingly distributed, infecting close to two thousand Canadians with HIV. Among them was Melanie Brooks's surgeon father who, after receiving a blood transfusion during open-heart surgery in 1985, learned he was HIV positive.

At a time when HIV/AIDS was misunderstood and public perception was shaped by fear, prejudice, and homophobia, victims of the disease faced ostracism and persecution. Wanting to protect his family from this stigma, Melanie's father decided his illness would be a secret they'd all keep. They did not know that her father would live past that first year, but he did. And for ten years before his death in 1995, from the time she was thirteen until she was twenty-three, Melanie's family lived in the shadow of AIDS. She carried the weight of the uncertain trajectory of her father's health and the heartbreaking anticipation of impending loss silently and alone. It became a way of life.

A Hard Silence is an intimate glimpse into Melanie's memories of coping with the tragedy of her father's illness and enduring the loneliness and isolation of not being able to speak. With candor and vulnerability, she opens her grief wounds and brings her reader inside her journey, twenty years after her father died, to finally understand the consequences of her family's silence, to interrogate the roots of stigma and discrimination responsible for the ongoing secret-keeping, and to show how she's now learned to be authentic.

©2023 Vine Leaves Press (P)2024 Melanie Brooks

Reseñas de la Crítica

"Melanie Brooks is that rare writer who can delve as deeply into the world of ideas as she can the pitted terrain of the human heart." Andre Dubus III, author of Such Kindness and Townie

"Quite simply, unforgettable." Monica Wood, author of When We Were the Kennedys

The continuity of the story, the honesty and descriptive nature that really brought you into the narrative.

Thank you for sharing your heart and your story Melanie. I’m so sorry you and your family had to go through all this by yourselves, but so glad for all the people you will now reach and help with your story.

On the Edge of this Family Secret

I grew up in the 70s-80s and remember feeling worried and empathetic about the AIDS epidemic. However, it also felt far from me.
*It was in this author’s house and kept secret!*

I cannot imagine. And then the church’s response…
I 💗 memoirs and this one kept me on the edge of my seat with its well-crafted movement and language through this unfortunately true family story!

Heart-wretching and raw!

This was a vulnerable, emotional, intensely honest memoir about the personal impact of the HIV/AIDS epidemic. When Melanie is 14, her dad gets diagnosed with HIV from a blood transfusion. Back in the 80s, little was known about this disease and the stigma was all too real, causing the Brooks' family to make the hard decision to lock down their secret -- a secret that festered inside Melanie for a solid decade.

My heart breaks for this author and what she and her family went through. To have a sick and dying father is one thing, but to be ostracized from the church AND to navigate their struggles alone -- in complete silence -- takes their suffering to a whole new level. If it had been cancer, they would've received boundless levels of support, guidance, religious community, and more. But with HIV/AIDS, they were left to carry this burden alone.

The writing was superb, going between the present day and the past, weaving together moments of hope, grief, celebration, denial, anger, compassion, and more. This was a book club pick and I'm excited to hear what everyone has to say about it.

I loved that Melanie was able to narrate the audiobook version herself. Not all authors possess the talent to do this, but Melanie did a phenomenal job! I was pulled right into the story and didn't want to stop listening.

If you love heart-wretching memoirs with piercing honesty, this is a must read!