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In the wake of a suicide, the most troubling questions are the most difficult to answer: How could we have known? What could we have done? And always: Why? Written by a clinical psychologist whose own life has been touched by suicide, this book offers the clearest account ever given of why some people choose to die.

“There is no good way to state these facts, which must be acknowledged. My husband and I had two children and lost them both: Vincent in 2017, at sixteen, James in 2024, at nineteen. Both chose suicide, and both died not far from home.” There is no good way to say this—because words fall short. It takes only an instant for death to become fact, “a single point in a timeline.” Living now on this single point, Li turns to thinking and reasoning and searching for words that might hold a place for James.

If you're struggling with suicidal thoughts, please know that you are not alone. When you're suffering, life can feel overwhelming and even insurmountable. This guided journal offers a safe space to help you process these difficult thoughts, soothe emotional pain, and create a crisis plan if needed. Grounded in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), this journal provides gentle writing prompts to help you safely explore your thoughts and feelings, understand symptoms and triggers, and identify your reasons for living.