Elias Zapple
AUTHOR

Elias Zapple

Elias Zapple was not born in 1922, as some would have you believe. His date of birth is not really relevant anyway. What is relevant is that he arose out of a tulip that was growing in some old granny's garden in Camberwell. How he got to be in a tulip is not really clear, nor is it clear how he got out of the tulip, and years later wrote the smash hit musical, 'Love, be a Stranger', which was an international flop.

After that success, he went on to work as a 19th century Victorian chimney sweep, when he was inspired to write the acclaimed series of books entitled 'Duke & Michel'. It is believed the fumes from the chimneys did so much damage to Elias, that it was a miracle he ever ate a cupcake again.

Later, he travelled back in time to the present, and went on a series of trips to many foreign and distant lands. During these travels, Elias met and listened to many interesting people, choosing to ignore all of them. He did, however, learn a couple of things: i) the earth is flat; and ii) you should never eat a banana when it's not ripe.

Many questions are often asked by his adoring public. Are you human? How many chimpanzees can fit inside a fridge? What is that thing growing on the side of your head? To which Mr Zapple has always smiled, turned away and swum off into the sunset; having only once been bitten by an unfriendly shark.

Elias Zapple continues to work towards the unification of Korea, and writing children's stories that parents will spend huge sums of money on. He wishes you all to know that every penny made from the books will go straight into his bank account, which he will then spend on a lavish, new tent.

For more Zappleness, please visit Elias Zapple's website at: www.eliaszapple.com

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Best Sellers

    • Jellybean the Dragon (The Wacky Adventures of Jellybean the Dragon & a Child Astronaut) (Ages 6-10)

    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: Gail Shalan
    • Length: 1 hr and 34 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      3.5 out of 5 stars 9
    • Performance
      2.5 out of 5 stars 6
    • Story
      2.5 out of 5 stars 6

    Jellybean is a clumsy dragon. As a matter of fact, all dragons are clumsy. So when Jellybean falls from the sky and lands in front of Emma, naturally a series of calamitous events occur....

    • 1 out of 5 stars
    • Annoying and boring

    • By Israel J on 03-23-17

    Regular price: $6.95

    • El libro de las babosas de Elias Zapple [Elias Zapple's Book of Slugs]

    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: Alfonso Sales
    • Length: 41 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4.5 out of 5 stars 3
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 3
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 3

    Conozcan a mis herócias Babosas. Steve, la Babosa, El General Fairfax la Babosa, Gino la Babosa, Akira la Babosa Ninja, Selina la Babosa y muchas, muchas más....

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Super entretenido!

    • By Lucia Ramos on 11-19-15

    Regular price: $3.95

    • Nicu - el pequeño vampiro con 'grandes colmillos' [Nicu - The Littlest Vampire: In 'Big Fangs']

    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: Alfonso Sales
    • Length: 44 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars 6
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars 6
    • Story
      5 out of 5 stars 6

    En una casa fantasmal en lo más profundo de las montañas de Transilvania vive Nicu, un vampiro que no tiene colmillos....

    Regular price: $3.95

    • Duke & Michel: The Mysterious Corridor

    • Duke & Michel, Book 1
    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: John Pennington
    • Length: 4 hrs and 18 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    Skateboarder Michel is freaking out as his cousin Romain has gone missing. Michel sticks his head through a hole in the garden fence and is sucked into a giant vortex....

    Regular price: $14.95

    • Le Livre des Limaces d'Elias Zapple [Elias Zapple's Book of Slugs]

    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: Bertrand Bosredon
    • Length: 36 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    Laissez-moi vous présenter mes limaces héroïques : Steve la Limace, Général Fairfax la Limace, Gino la Limace, Akira la Limace Ninja, Sélina la Limace et bien d'autres encore....

    Regular price: $3.95

    • Nicu: der kleinste vampir in "Fangzahnlos" [Nicu: The Smallest Vampire in "Fangzahnlos"]

    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: Ilja Rosendahl
    • Length: 35 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    In einem gespenstischen haus tief in den bergen von Transsilvanien lebt Nicu, ein vampir ohne fangzähne. Ja, das ist richtig, ohne fänge....

    Regular price: $3.95

    • Nicu: der Kleinste Vampir: in Große Fänge

    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: Ilja Rosendahl
    • Length: 34 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    In einem gespenstischen haus tief in den bergen von Transsilvanien lebt Nicu, ein vampir ohne fangzähne. Ja, das ist richtig, ohne fänge....

    Regular price: $3.95

    • Cyril the Dragon

    • The Jellybean the Dragon Stories, Book 2
    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: Gabrielle Baker
    • Length: 1 hr and 49 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    Jellybean the Dragon has been dragonnapped by the dragon-hating knights from Camelot and it's up to 10-year-old astronaut Emma and Cyril the Dragon to rescue him....

    Regular price: $6.95

    • El Dragon Jellybean [Spanish Edition]

    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: Alfonso Sales, Laura Sales
    • Length: 1 hr and 22 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars 7
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars 7
    • Story
      5 out of 5 stars 7

    Jellybean es un dragon muy torpe. De hecho, todos los dragones lo son. Asique cuando Jellybean cae desde el cielo y aterriza a los pies de Emma, una astronauta de 10 anos....

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Una historia para niños

    • By Fernando on 12-17-16

    Regular price: $6.95

    • Elias Zapple's Rhymes from the Cabbage Patch (Zany, Funny, Illustrated Poems For Ages 9+ Book 1)

    • By: Elias Zapple
    • Narrated by: Richard Mann
    • Length: 50 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars 2
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars 2
    • Story
      5 out of 5 stars 2

    Inside this audiobook, you will find: Funny nonsense from my mind. Zany rhymes and slimy tales....

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Fifty Minutes of Unadulterated Fun in Zapple-world

    • By Convoke on 12-09-14

    Regular price: $3.95

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