Appreciated the integration of approaches used in this book toward finding long term ways to work through addictions. I'm using this for my food addictions and working with some anxieties. Highly recommend and I'll post again when I experience using the methods longer term. I'm going to buy some copies for family members now!
Recently my son was arrested for watching under-age pornography. Since that time I have been reading, watching, and researching every book article, website, and video I can get my hands on to learn how best to help him. This book is fantastic in setting a course that can be followed by both of us to create a loving life for him. I work as a facilitator in my church's 12-step program and see miracles happen daily with the participants. I can't wait to infuse these meetings with some of the knowledge I have learned from this book.
Very good book, although I'm not religious, I kept an open mind and went through the book in the timeframe suggested. Although I've had one relapse since reading it, it wasn't a bad relapse and I no longer feel like a hopless slave to smutland.com.
I liked the different Approach to the over-arching sex or lust addiction this book takes as compared to 12-step programs. Definitely a good alternative for someone who can't get to a meeting, but requires the motivation to change
My husband has accepted that he has an addiction and I read most of this book with him/followed through the processes. I can honestly say it's a little silly in the way it's written from fictitious people's lives but it's somewhat believable that they could exist. With that aside, it has a lot of really good principals and I'm overly anxious/controlling because I want to protect my marriage. This book doesn't make me feel like it's asking too much of ME. It doesn't have a 'taper off' kind of approach. It doesn't have an 'accept it's going to happen every now and again' kind of approach. I was really afraid it was going to have a step I wasn't willing to allow, ie: trust that he's not doing it when he says he's not doing it. From what he says, he's not looking at porn or masturbating at all. He's going on 4 months of not viewing and not doing.
From his perspective, the book has helped. He's been struggling with addiction since he was 11, his father thinks it's a man thing. He does have times where he's completely exhausted from his temptations but it's a lot easier to say no than it used to be. He can talk about it easier now, he can clearly see the damage it does in his life and how much better he feels when he is in control.
Unfortunately for us, there aren't any local programs for porn addicts but he does attend a 12 step meeting (this book isn't 12 step) in addition to completing the book. He likes that he is in a non-judgmental environment and he appreciates that he can talk about it without hurting me (as I am not there).
The only negative I have is that this doesn't really have much for the repairing a relationship process. I don't know what to do or where to start but the book isn't meant to be about fixing a relationship, it's about gaining control over your addiction.