"Well, when Jesus looked down from the cross, he didn't think, 'I am giving myself to you because you are so attractive to me.' No, he was in agony, and he looked down at us--denying him, abandoning him, and betraying him--and in the greatest act of love in history, he STAYED. He said, 'Father, forgive them, they don't know what they are doing.' He loved us, not because we were lovely to him, but to make us lovely. That is why I am going to love my spouse. Speak to your heart like that."
Last summer, when I was 100% single, one of my good friends recommended I read this book. "Like, when I'm dating someone?" I asked. "Nope. Read it right now." And I am so glad I did. This book has gone a long way in rewiring and reframing the subtle, selfish way I look at relationships, not just romantic ones. It is a beautifully blunt study in love that never forgets to point back to the One who put that desire for love in our hearts in the first place, God.